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Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

0 posted 2002-10-18 01:56 AM

~*~ The reference to buying stuff isn't towards alcohol or drugs, it's about food ~*~

Choker and chains
black collar and beads...
wreck my nails?
I don't think so, hunny;
you'll be buyin' me some
of that stuff I usually buy
for you...
  (walk me to the class from
    Hell and I might forgive you)
Black clothing and blue-black hair
blood red nail polish, black makeup
and red black lipstick
  (come over and help me feed my
    fish - I kinda have a lot)
I'll wear my black tank top and
your tie; and maybe let up on
the lipstick for once
I'll think about wearing your grey
hoodie to bring some colour to my life
or I'll just wear my scarf
  (and we'll go riding into the sunrise,
    cause the sunset is too cliche)

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

1 posted 2002-10-18 02:07 AM

Hey, Rhonda~
You already know that I love this poem.
I really enjoyed the way it takes off in so many
different directions.  It's a bit 'off the wall'
and I like that.  Very cool.
The imagery was great.  I could see it all.
I could just picture you all gothed out..lol.
Awesome write, my friend.
Hugs,
~Vicky
P.S. Great title too!

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

2 posted 2002-10-18 11:12 AM

Rhonda? Gothed out? I'd never have known...

I like how you used clothing to kind of describe certain aspects of yourself... that was pretty creative of you, reminded me of Macbeth sorta...

Nice work, Rhonda.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

3 posted 2002-10-18 11:55 AM

*frowns* *smiles* I like this it's very off beat and quite different to your usual writings. Thank you for sharing this with us

Andrew

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

4 posted 2002-10-18 01:58 PM

* smiles * Great write, talk to you later?

* hugs *

Riley

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

PoetryIsLife

Senior Member

since 2001-10-27

Posts 1763
...in my boxers...

5 posted 2002-10-18 04:24 PM

You already know the most important of my thoughts on this poem. So, I won't bother repeating them.

By the way, damn!

The new pic is lovely, me dear.

Sincerely,
Ti

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

6 posted 2002-10-18 07:27 PM

Hehe I liked the ending of it. The sunset is too cliche. Well done on the poem.

This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'.

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

7 posted 2002-10-25 05:46 AM

I'm thinking this one deserves another bump to the top.

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes
[This message has been edited by vlraynes (10-25-2002 05:47 AM).]

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