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Teen Poetry #6
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Riley
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in the pouring rain

0 posted 2002-10-04 09:21 PM



pulse pounding
eat it eat it
greenish hue
f
a
  l
   l
    i
     n
      g
gone away
for now
i am back
why should i be here
nothing but a nusience

heaves come
slowly at first
then more
and more and more
up it comes
what i want

i scream
my waist is to big
i know it
promises

it hurts
so bad
but i know it has to come

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

© Copyright 2002 Riley Grant - All Rights Reserved
Local Parasite
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1 posted 2002-10-05 01:50 AM


This is very disturbing, as is the subject matter...

I'm glad to see you deviating from your usual subject matter to delve into something a bit more global.  This is an admirable step in everyone's poetic development.  I personally have a greater inclination to enjoy poetry that deals with a widespread problem, instead of just a personal one...

If this is a personal one as well, then my heart goes out to you.  You shouldn't ever have to feel like this, and I hope that you seek some kind of guidance.  Although if you're open enough about your problem to post a poem about it, then I suppose you're closer to recovery.

Great work, and keep smiling, Riley.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

SEA
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with you
2 posted 2002-10-05 02:42 AM


Riley,
this does touch so many. I hope truly that this isn't something you are personally going through, and if it is, and you want to talk (or email), I'm here. (((hugs))) ~SEA

Riley
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3 posted 2002-10-05 07:52 AM


Well.....it sorta is and isn't at the same time....my friends are all kind going through saying I'm to fat and what not....so I am kinda starting to feel weird around it...but its not totally about me because I am as thin as a bean pole...Thanks for your concern and replys!


Ri

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

SEA
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4 posted 2002-10-05 10:52 AM


Riley,
tell your friends to stop talking to you that way! (Or get new friends) Honestly, it's about being healthy, not skinny. Did you know that when girls do that, it totally jacks up their bodies, it messes with your chances of ever having kids, and oh yeah, you destroy vital organs too....let's not forget die from doing this (((hugs))) for you, don't let anyone persuade you to be anything less than your very best  

Local Parasite
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5 posted 2002-10-05 01:35 PM


Well Riley, if your friends really are calling you that even if you insist you're skinny as a bean pole... maybe it's them that have problems and need help, not you.

I don't care what they're doing to their bodies, you're smart enough not to kill yourself over something so stupid... I know that, which is why I'm not worried about you.

I trust you to make the best choices for yourself.

Riley
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in the pouring rain
6 posted 2002-10-05 02:25 PM


Getting harder it seems though Parasite..thanks anyway!

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

anonymousfemale
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7 posted 2002-10-07 02:53 AM


I don't really like this piece all that much. I find it most irritating when people that actually have no comprehension of this particular topic write about it and spin off utter crap. You might want to check your grammar as well. The 'to' should be 'too'.

~AF~

"It is far more difficult to murder a phantom than a reality." - Virginia Woolf

hexrain
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8 posted 2002-10-07 03:20 AM


the person i write about in most of my poems is going through this exact thing. she shuts herself out from the world and does this to herself, all the while she pretends that no one notices that she is doing it. it is sad to watch someone say they are "fat" when they are 20 pounds or more underweight. especially when you can tell they are not just striving for attention. it is important to explore this subject, even if its not from first hand knowledge. evry little bit helps... anonymousfelmale please, do not try to put down someones effort to make light of this horrible affliction.
Chloey
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9 posted 2002-10-07 07:59 AM


i really liked this Ri, i know our school has some gurlz who are funny about their weight they wanna be perfect and they are only jealous about skinny bean poles(like you and me)dont worry about ur weight yiu are a beautiful person and a lot of the fat comments are just jokes but i know they  arent funny somtimes!!!And anonymousfemale i think you were a lil' to harsh on her!!


              *$*Chloey*$*


You can fall from the sky,
You can fall from a tree,but,
The best way to fall is in love with me

[This message has been edited by Chloey (10-07-2002 08:00 AM).]

Riley
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in the pouring rain
10 posted 2002-10-07 08:08 AM


AF: I am quite knowlegable about this particular subject acutally, whatever you might think.... as my other friends have said this poem covers a quite hard subject to deal with. And obvisously everyone else did no think this was utter crap and you so oddly put it.

To everyone else: Thank you for replying.


Ri

~* Love humiliates you, hatered cradles you-White Olender *~

Skyfire
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11 posted 2002-10-07 10:52 PM


Riley I'm not sure I liked it, probably because of how close to home it hit. You wrote well about this topic though, and I think your friends are all boogers for saying those things about you. *hugs*

A toque IS a hat! And I have one!

quietlydying
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the wonderful land of oz
12 posted 2002-10-12 01:54 AM


i agree with you af.

i didn't enjoy this piece either, for the reasons stated above.

/jen/

i just haven't been the same since that house fell on my sister.

[the closest thing i've found to heaven is sitting here talking to you.bif naked]

Dopey Dope
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13 posted 2002-10-12 03:59 PM


I'm not really sure what this is all about. I mean, I know what it is about, but....it just confuses me how somebody could care so much about what other people say. Put somebody in front of me and I could find a million flaws, put myself in front of me and I could do the same. It's all a matter of how you see the world, I guess. I happen to be a positive person....I also happen to be quite skinny. People always comment on how skinny I am, but do I let it get me down? No way, I have no problem with my body and if others do, then their lives aren't that much better than the dirty minded hobo in the corner of my university building who constantly screams out to the girls.
Accept and overcome.

As for the poem, I liked it but it wasn't the best that I've read from you. I do, however look forward to more.

This post has been brought to you by the 'Totally Awesome Society of Puerto Rican Egotistical Sexy Men'.

Local Parasite
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14 posted 2002-10-12 04:04 PM


And I'm not going to let that skinny kid at the university discourage me from finding my one true love.  See?  It's great to be who you are.
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