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Teen Poetry #6
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Deep_Inside
Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 377
i can't stop hiding

0 posted 2002-09-27 02:36 AM



the stress is coming back to me
and i can no longer hold it in
i keep fighting with myself
and it's getting more voilent each day
my eyes are playing tricks on me
and i don't like seeing people that aren't there
i can't trust what my ears are hearing
their aren't that many poeple who call my name
no longer will i be alone
for the shaddow people are right by my side
the days are flowing together
i haven't slept for the past week
my emotions are changing so fast
i given up on them all
i dissapeared into a dark spot
i'm afired to go outside
my mind is controlling me without asking me
i think it's turning on me, i have to expet the worst
my paranoia is becomming uncontrolable
i can't stand haveing people around me
i'm fading in and out fo conshisness
i wakeup days from when i fell asleep
i'm starting to think the voices in my head are people
they really like talking to me
i can run buti can't hide
i'm eating myself from the inside

© Copyright 2002 Matt - All Rights Reserved
eor
Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
1 posted 2002-09-27 04:05 AM


i could have not said it more perfectly myself...eor
Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
2 posted 2002-09-30 02:00 PM


The closing rhyme was alright, but otherwise I felt this was a bit wordy.  You border on cliche with a few of the wordings you use.

This is alright, but I enjoyed your other more.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » I'm eating myself from the inside

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