navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Drained
Teen Poetry #6
Post A Reply Post New Topic Drained Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Marshalzu
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681
Lurking

0 posted 2002-09-12 04:08 PM


Drained

At the end of the day
as raindrops of misery reign
it’s not your makeup that fades
just the illusion of happiness
that has slowly d
                 e
                  c
                   a
                  y
                 e
                 d

and time leaves it’s mark
as the mist starts to SWELL
covering the dark rings
the scars of no sleep
the ugliness of another dawn

Andrew

"I still feel the pain in my heart, what once was pure is now diluted" - Biffy Cylro

© Copyright 2002 Andrew Sewell - All Rights Reserved
Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
1 posted 2002-09-12 09:11 PM


This is better! This is more like what I'm used to reading from you. My ego wants me to think this is about me, but it's all good. Don't stop writing, kay? Even if you hate the world, don't ever stop writing.

I don't drink. I end up making out with random guys. *thinks* Okay, random guys AND random girls. That is why I don't drink.

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
2 posted 2002-09-13 04:48 AM



*smiles at Rhonda's ego*

Andrew~
This really is well written and well expressed.
I definately have to echo Rhonda.
Don't ever stop writing.
I always enjoy reading you.
Hugs,
~Vicky




"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

[This message has been edited by vlraynes (09-13-2002 04:49 AM).]

PoetryIsLife
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763
...in my boxers...
3 posted 2002-09-13 11:50 AM


Damn. You are a truly gifted poet, Andrew.

Sincerely,
Titus

"I'll prepare myself, and one day my time will come."
            -Abraham Lincoln

Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...
4 posted 2002-09-13 10:56 PM


wow!!!! i reallllyyy liked this one alot! awesum job!!

~Ur feelings never change, u just learn 2 hide them~

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 1258
meet Morgana
5 posted 2002-09-14 10:43 PM


Watch your language, Daniel.

I'd have to agree with everyone above... sometimes appreciation is lost on too many words.. so I guess I'll just say.. thank you.

"you don't need one of these to let me inside of you" T.A.

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
6 posted 2002-09-26 07:13 PM




Because this is too good to sit at the bottom.
Love this one, Andrew.

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Allysa
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden
7 posted 2002-09-27 11:19 AM


WOW!  Breath-taking... I'm speechless... WoW!
Kudos!

"You're the center of adrenaline And I'm beginning to understand You could be the best thing about me." -SG

Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
8 posted 2002-09-30 01:56 PM


This is very good.  I especially like "the raindrops reign."  That's a really neat play on words.

Well written, Andrew.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Drained

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary