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regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

0 posted 2002-10-11 12:21 PM

I tremble.
      Cells scream with need.
I wait out this phenomenon.
      Though feeling forced,
I don't persue.

Just as calmness overcomes me now
      by your mere presence,
I beg God for serenity
      to fill the gouging void
when you do go.

It must be enough, this stark
                   realization

      that ~you~ even exist.

It is true, I underestimated
      the greatness of you.
And, also true
the world needs all of your energy
      more than I need some.

But, I swallow hard
      the lump of rage
      overpowering me.

Angry, not because I'll not be
                   part of you,
      but, because the world
                         you feel
so obligated to make right
will annihilate you,
      before ever accepting

          your truth.

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant

since 2002-06-08

Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA

1 posted 2002-10-11 12:23 PM

Awesome write. Very good with words you are.

Cold hands means a warm heart

Zinsser
Senior Member

since 2001-02-27

Posts 1641
Calif.

2 posted 2002-10-11 01:07 PM

This is very good... well done

~~ Connie ~~

LngJhnAg
Member Elite

since 1999-07-23

Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

3 posted 2002-10-11 01:11 PM

There's got to be more to this story than this, you tease! Cc'mon; out with it!

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

4 posted 2002-10-11 07:51 PM

the-loner-23, thank you

Connie, thank you, too

LngJhnAg, there was, and I'm not tellin!

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

5 posted 2002-10-11 09:36 PM

I like the style of this poem very much. Layered message, picked up more of it each time I read.

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

6 posted 2002-10-11 09:45 PM

Duncan, I enjoyed writing in this style, but, it just sort of put itself on paper as I wrote. I appreciate your comments a lot.

Thank you,
Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

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