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Open Poetry #22
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Mistletoe Angel
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0 posted 2002-09-28 05:22 PM


(Hanky-Alert Poem)

You Stupid Boy
By: Noah Eaton
9/28/02

Well I used to be scared every night
Lost myself in sorrow in the jester's venipuncture
No propensity to hope when I was anesthetized
Seems I would just go off on any random measure
School kids pushed me onto the pavement
I couldn't talk until I was three years old
Is there something terminally wrong with me?
I can remember my mom hugging me, crying with her face so cold

Saying, "You stupid boy!"
Will you be this way forever
You stupid boy
If only I could tell you how I feel whatsoever
You stupid boy
Don't tell me God made you this way
I just hope I come around someday...

3 A.M and I'm not sleeping
Don't want to have nightmares tonight
I'm fishing for answers to my questions
So many salty tears to fight
Spent two weeks in a quiet hospital
Felt my heart was in hemorrhage
The fear spread through me like a cancer
Living on Sesame Street, orange juice and syringes
And you said,

"You stupid boy!"
Will you be this way forever
You stupid boy
If only I could tell you how I feel whatsoever
You stupid boy
Don't tell me God made you this way
I just hope I come around someday...

Couldn't speak, I couldn't move
You thought I was becoming mute
Had seizures in the night
I cried
Praying for an angel to arrive...

Sixteen days went by eventually
They discovered I had Asperger's Syndrome
Spent years attending a therapist for help
I just wanted so badly to go home
School kids pushed me onto the pavement
I couldn't talk until I was three years old
Is there something terminally wrong with me?
I can remember my mom hugging me, crying with her face so cold
Dropping to her knees, and she said:

"You stupid boy!"
Will you be this way forever
You stupid boy
If only I could tell you how I feel whatsoever
You stupid boy
Don't tell me God made you this way
I just hope you come around someday...
You said "You stupid boy!"
Will you be this way forever
You stupid boy
If only I could tell you how I feel whatsoever
You stupid boy
Don't tell me God made you this way
I just hope you come around someday...

I just hope you come around someday...
I just hope you come around someday...
I just hope you come around someday...
I just hope you come around someday...
Oh, you stupid boy...

Oh, you stupid boy...
You stupid boy...
You stupid boy...



"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira



[This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (09-28-2002 07:27 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Nadia Lockheart - All Rights Reserved
SEA
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with you
1 posted 2002-09-28 06:02 PM


Oh Noah, you aren't stupid at all.....
I hope all is ok with you today...(((hugs)))

Suetang
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since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
2 posted 2002-09-28 06:11 PM


Hello Noah

Your words chilled me to the bone and I felt your pain so vividly.  I can only hope that a lot of your pain has dispersed even tho I'm sure your memories are still clear.  I hope these words warm your heart a little :

When the willow bends
at the first hint of troubled breezes
our friends come running
to see how they can help.
Sometimes friends know
when they are needed even before
we realise it ourselves,
because we are accustomed to
letting them in on
the happenings of our lives

* * *

A real friend
never gets in your way
unless you happen to be
on the way down

* * *

One of the most beautiful
qualities of true friendship
is to understand
and to be understood

* * *

Take care my friend

Love Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2002-09-28 06:35 PM


Noah, thank you for the "hanky-alert"--I needed it.

I just looked up Aspergers Syndrome and it is a form of autism. Apparently it is a neurological disorder that makes it very difficult for those who have it to make friends, carry on conversations or feel a full range of emotions.

Look what you have managed to accomplish given the obstacles you have had to overcome. You, sweet Noah, have more friends than anyone on the planet, your "conversation" on the printed page is beyond human (of course it is--you're an angel!), and talk about expressing a wide range of emotions---well, the proof is in the pudding--you are awesome, you are smart and I and hundreds of other people LOVE YOU!

Stupid Boy? I don't think so! Smart Man?---Absolutely YES!!!

Love,
Linda

vandana
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4 posted 2002-09-28 06:49 PM


enjoy thank you for sharing  this
Bill Charles
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since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
5 posted 2002-09-28 06:52 PM


Noah - I read this and felt your emotions. You are not a stupid boy, no way.. You are one of the most gentle and caring persons I've had the privelege to meet...

BC

paladin
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Pensacola,Fl.
6 posted 2002-09-28 07:16 PM


My birth father got my 14yo mother pregnant and died on a beach in the south pacific.I was brought up with the stigma of being a bastard.My mother never mentioned my father with out a curse word.My grand mother said I had the evil of my father in my veins.She would look at me with cruel eyes and quote the bible."The sins of the father......."Words can do more damage than physical abuse.We can appear to be over them but the scars seldom show.It takes a strong man to show compasion and sensitivity.I respect you and salute you.The order of the golden heart for one of passions heros.  

paladin

Nightshade
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just out of reach
7 posted 2002-09-28 07:26 PM


Dearest Noah, Sometimes parents, people who think they are adults, children, pastors, and doctors can be so blind to the fact that each of us is special in one way or another. It just takes time and patience on the part of the caretaker. But, as the saying goes, "patience is a virtue." Not many of us have it. You have been through so much in your life and will probably face adversity once again, as we all do, but you will face it bravely and with a brilliance that outshines all others. Take heart my friend. I must go get another kleenex. hugs, Chris

Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away.

Tiersdin
Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364
east coast
8 posted 2002-09-28 07:39 PM


Noah, did you know that your name meant, "comfort" or "consolation"?  well it does and you are that to so many of us here.  Each time that you reply to my post, it feels as if I've been given the softest, squeeziest (though that's not a word ) hug. I'm always appreciative of that.  Others can be cruel and give up on you, but never ever give up on yourself.  You have proven, as Earth Angel mentioned, that you have long since out grown the little boy who was called such an unfair name.  But, even if you still feel him inside, cherish him, protect him, and most of all, remove the blame from him.  Nothing that happened was ever your fault.  Whenever you feel this way, remind yourself that you were just a child and it wasn't your fault.  

I love you, Noah..
*hugs*
~Tier

"I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..."

Singing Sparrow
Member
since 2002-05-12
Posts 94

9 posted 2002-09-29 10:15 PM




SS

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
10 posted 2002-09-29 10:27 PM



I love you sidekick.

SimplyGold
Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453

11 posted 2002-09-29 10:37 PM


Noah,

When I first read your warm and loving reply to my first post. I thought " this is an angel whose spirit soars and is a healer"
Your soul comes through so strongly, you are a blessing. You are intelligent, warm, caring, sensitive and tender. This list can go on. Do you doubt it? Just look at the reponses that you receive.

Noah, That experience was a lifetime ago. Feel pity for the one who used this. "Forgive them for they know not what they say. Forgive them for they know not what they do"

They cannot hurt you now, do not let them hurt you anymore.

I'm so glad you're you!

A loving Piptalk Friend  

[This message has been edited by SimplyGold (09-29-2002 10:45 PM).]

ecrivan
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since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
12 posted 2002-09-29 10:39 PM


Stop the crying now and start being happy...your values are precious and you have friends who value YOU


FuzzyFrazzledFraggle
Member
since 2002-09-20
Posts 155
Fraggle Rock
13 posted 2002-09-29 11:13 PM


and then some, Sweet Mistletoe Angel! Your words grace these pages with such style and your words definately made me cry! You've come a long way apparently, chin up! We all Love you, And God as you can tell will never let you down! You seem very optimistic and bring forth much love and friendship to everyone...send some my way if you can

Consider yourself fuzzed

CSKpoet
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since 2002-07-12
Posts 845
Island in Paradise
14 posted 2002-09-29 11:24 PM


I am just without the right words to express about this...all I can say is Look how beautiful a man Noah is, God's man, and a bright shining light who comforts all of us. Big huge hugs to you! Hope you can handle all of this love
You bloom so beautifully!
Cher

Poetry is:
Passion, imagination and intellect running together.

Aloha with warmest regards, Cheryl Stewart Koomoa

Paul Wilson
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United States
15 posted 2002-09-30 03:56 AM


Noah...You have but to read all these sweet replies and look into your heart for the answer.God has rescued you from this ordeal because he has a special place for you in his heart and a master plan of which you are a part of...Paul
Midnitesun
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Gaia
16 posted 2002-09-30 06:38 AM


Noah, you have climbed an emotional Pike's Peak...or was it Everest?
Look how far away from that deep valley you are now!
You are now in complete control, and the pathway is yours to choose.

rwood
Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793
Tennessee
17 posted 2002-09-30 07:20 AM


I've always seen beautiful things in your poetry. So much good..so much heart..and a sincere openness that most of us have to grow to learn..to express. A gift you are and have. Love and hugs.

Reg

NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise
18 posted 2002-09-30 10:49 AM


Noah, my sweet, lovable friend. I constantly talk with my friends about you telling them of your poems, your loving heart and how brilliant you are.

Your childhood was not filled with wonderful memories, but hopefully you can put those days behind you and know that now you are loved and admired.

You are special ... Hugs, Marti

Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
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Listening to every heart
19 posted 2002-09-30 11:04 AM


http://users.wpi.edu/~trek/aspergers.html#what

Isn't it interesting how people can come to conclusions without knowing "the rest of the tory"?  I have linked a site, Noah, to this poem of yours, so people can find out a little more about medical complications such as yours.

You have done so much with your life - I know you are going to continue to do oh so much more!

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
20 posted 2002-09-30 04:24 PM


{{{{{HUGZ}}}}} my friend, life is full of challenges... all of which somebody with a heart and mind as strong as yours will have no problems overcoming.  Stay strong my friend and you will make it with flying colors.

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



Cpat Hair
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21 posted 2002-09-30 04:49 PM


no way stupid... hard to live through these kinds of words, but you are proof it can be done.
SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
22 posted 2002-09-30 05:07 PM


Noah, first off, let me say, "You Are Not A Stupid Boy"! You are a very kind, thoughtful and compassionate person. I am so sorry you had to grow up hearing this.
Irie
Senior Member
since 1999-12-01
Posts 1493
Washington State
23 posted 2002-09-30 05:23 PM


~*Pushing back the tears*~

Oh Noah, this is SO sad, I almost couldn't finish reading it.
AS a mother of a 5 year old, I can't even imagine, and don't care to.
This is awful, for such a small child to go through, let alone any child.

If this is a personal experience you've had....I'm so sorry you have to deal with it.

HUGS to you!

~Sheri

"Don't wait for your ship to come in ...
Swim out to it"

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
24 posted 2002-09-30 06:45 PM


Noah

Perhaps the hateful words she spoke, and the time you spent being ill, helped make you the sensitive, sweet caring man you are.  Certain spirits are made stronger by adversity, and you, my friend, have a strong spirit.  

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
25 posted 2002-09-30 08:22 PM


noah-
you are certainly not stupid--in fact
i think you are brilliant! this was so
sad, i hope things are well for you now
take care hon.
amy

"if irish eyes are smiling...they are probably up to something" :)

passing shadows
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displaced
26 posted 2002-09-30 10:11 PM


I would cry if I didn't think that you were smart enough to know the truth
Auguste
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By the sea
27 posted 2002-09-30 10:27 PM


Noah, I have to agree with Linda.  You're a very special and wonderful person & friend.   
Krishankins
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28 posted 2002-10-01 02:27 AM


I see you got it posted, Noah. I would first like to applaud your WONDERFUL courage in being able to share this with so many people. I also applaud your writing ability. This is written so, that it feels like you are inside the child's mind. One line stood out to me the most,

"Living on Sesame Street, orange juice, and syringes"

This is so dramatic!! Sad piece, Noah. I'm sorry that you had to go through such an ordeal. You have definitely "came around". Your talent as a writer, and as a friend have been an inspiration to many.....MANY people here on passions. I can only imagine how many people in your everyday life have benefitted from knowing you. I know I have, and I've never even met you!!
I hope you continue to inspire those around you with the love, courage, and understanding that you give so freely every day.

Thanks for the write, Noah!!!!!!!!!

Kris

Hey dog, did you see the size of that chicken!?

BloomingRose
Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092
Florida
29 posted 2002-10-01 07:51 AM


Noah~ You are a bright and shining star, a light that turns a dark and gloomy day into instant sunshine.
Nothing about you is stupid. If only others (including me) had a heart as warm as yours.

Hugs,
Deb

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