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Open Poetry #22
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ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA

0 posted 2002-09-19 09:51 PM





Soliloquy II

My treasure chest was levied
indentured to compositions that lay covered in obscurity
striving for poetry in motion but tamed into stillness
Why is it easier to release the soul
on paper
than with a repentant voice?
I dissected my errors like a surgeon
plans drawn with loose limb extremities until gotten right.
Write like this:and this, but not like
THAT
Everyone wants you to become one of 'us'
as if that sanctions their elective choices.
I think that is the purpose of writing:
not expunging, cleansing, but
validation.
You walk the ends of the earth in a lifetime
just to find where the world begins:
a place to start.
But we are all just cats with water bordering us
Paper Tigers
Some of learn how to swim
some of us . . .
don’t

Want to see my Lifesaving card?


[This message has been edited by ShadowRider (09-19-2002 09:52 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Picasso Lyrics - All Rights Reserved
the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
1 posted 2002-09-19 10:20 PM


I like this. It was very interesting.

Cold hands means a warm heart

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
2 posted 2002-09-19 10:51 PM


I love the introspect in this one, Jeff...
especially the last verse...
But I guess I'd better be on my way, if you are cat....because I am a chipmunk afterall....  without a lifesaving card
~ swimming hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
3 posted 2002-09-19 10:55 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Jeff, I wish that all of us could swim, sadly it seems many of us get dissolved in this mess of demands and we become uniform to everyone else and are chased away from our own true colors! (sigh) You truly are a lifeguard of wisdom and with words like yours I know you can always influence so many, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jeff, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
4 posted 2002-09-19 10:55 PM


So very excellent...paper tigers...
Yahuh...SWIM!

ThisDiamond

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
5 posted 2002-09-20 10:30 AM


Is that a picture of "The Thinker"---if so, methinks it reflects that aspect of you. Your work is always thought-provoking and your intelligence shines through.

P.S. Now that I've stroked your ego, may I
  borrow your Lifesaving card some time? hehe

~ May you never have need of that card again-----but keep your credit cards---you can't live without them! hahaha

EA

Dulcinea
Senior Member
since 2001-07-22
Posts 774
IN
6 posted 2002-09-20 01:43 PM


I really like this one, for so many reasons. I can't think of one line or phrase that is more predominate over the other as they all flow and connect together so well. Beautifully penned my love!

[This message has been edited by Dulcinea (09-20-2002 01:44 PM).]

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
7 posted 2002-09-20 01:47 PM


ShadowRider~
Wow !
Absolutely fantabulous !!!

Let me see that card ... your talent is showing !
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
           noles1@totcon.com                       

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