Pathos of the Darkening Path (villanelle)

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RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

0 posted 2002-09-19 10:40 AM

My joie de vivre now passes light to shade
birth pure and white to age black desolate
yet through that breach all passions hues have strayed

Mosaically chromatic life inlaid
in youth it seems more brilliance then alit
my joie de vivre now passes light to shade

Through greens of Spring and jealousy it wade
'neath skies of blue and moods I would submit
yet through that breach all passions hues have strayed

Yes scarlet draped in lust I would parade
and blush in blood red anger when it fit
my joie de vivre now passes light to shade

The gold this life was Sun not wealth I'd made
intensity my colors I admit
yet through that breach all passions hues have strayed

So at this rainbows end the life I made
will have to do there is no changing it
my joie de vivre now passes light to shade
yet through that breach all passions hues have strayed

"Happy people have no history" - French Proverb

[This message has been edited by RSWells (09-19-2002 02:11 PM).]

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

1 posted 2002-09-19 11:12 AM

Richard

I don't know much about this form, but seems to me that this is fantastic! I enjoyed the read. Thank you.

RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

2 posted 2002-09-19 11:56 AM

Thank you Martie for your always generous comments. This I believe is the fifth villanelle I've posted here and I enjoy them. The form is (to quote from Nortons)
"A French verse derived from an earlier Italian folk song, retains the circular pattern of a peasant dance. It consists of 5 tercets rhyming aba followed by a quatrain rhyming abaa, with the first line of the initial tercet recurring as the last line of the second and forth tercets and the third line of the initial tercet recurring as the last line of the third and fifth tercets, these two refrains being again repeated as the last two lines of the poem."
Probably the most famous examples would be Dylan Thomas' "Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night" (dedicated to his fathers passing) and Theodore Roethkes "The Waking".
The difficulty is in having these lines all run smoothly and make sense in the bargain. I have fun with them but have far to go.

[This message has been edited by RSWells (09-19-2002 11:57 AM).]

Moonlight Romeo

Senior Member

since 2001-09-10

Posts 982
The heart of you

3 posted 2002-09-19 12:13 PM

Yes, I too have fights with the French, but you have done well here.

Thank you.

What light through yon window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.

the_loner_23
Member Ascendant

since 2002-06-08

Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA

4 posted 2002-09-19 03:06 PM

Awesome write

Cold hands means a warm heart

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

5 posted 2002-09-19 03:20 PM

I respect how well you wrote this villanelle. They are in my opinion, one of the most difficult forms of poetry to write.

I posted a villanelle called, "GOD'S LIGHT"
and I have to be honest, I had to follow the guidelines like I was reading a recipe book! hehe You really have to get your mind around these babies.

Kudos on this exceptionally well done villanelle.

Earth Angel

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

6 posted 2002-09-19 03:31 PM

RSWells,
They are hard to write and you did a very good job, enjoyed.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

7 posted 2002-09-19 03:45 PM

Indeed, you do have this form down....it suits your style of writing most perfectly, Richard.

And this poem, yes..."the dark night of the soul"--methinks I know this place. sighs, but

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