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Open Poetry #22
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RSWells
Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533


0 posted 2002-09-09 08:14 AM



Three days they figure he had hung
before his brother found him,
my Irish cousin Suzies son,
three day more police impound him.

The ruffled white silk casket lid
contrasts olive head and hands,
tis here we meet alas, amid
all the Loved ones his death strands.

Shock and shame's the Mothers toll,
I view the selfish carcass
which smote the body, maimed the soul
declivitous its darkness.

Tis lifelong guilt the brothers fee
his legacy for caring,
did Damon think that he'd be free
and not this pain be sharing?

Where'd ya see lad you would go
once yer candle dimmed to smoke?
Was yer darkness deepened so
that you thought its gloom you'd choke?

Damned ye now eternal hell
where in Minos tail you'll wring
and curl your shade e'er to dwell
seventh circle, second ring.

Masks we use for Love offcast
bare only two true faces,
God and self, this hope once passed
are just nouns death erases.

I know well that bleak canyon,
I've watched its walls arise
where boundless pain abandons
unheard ya think all cries.

Forever hear yer Mothers howls
your requested music bled,
there rooted in the hopeless bowels
some crap by the Grateful Dead.

And while I share depressions chain
I viewed you with distaste,
Your lasting impression's pain
what waste, what waste, what waste!


"Happy people have no history" - French Proverb

[This message has been edited by RSWells (09-09-2002 11:19 AM).]

© Copyright 2002 Richard S. Wells jr. - All Rights Reserved
WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
1 posted 2002-09-09 08:49 AM


And while I share depressions chain
I viewed you with distaste,
Your lasting impression's pain
what waste, what waste, what waste!

I could feel the deep sense of loss and the horrible tragic waste this is in your words.

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2002-09-09 09:33 AM


Intense. You write so well of darkness. I could feel pain, frustration, and disgust through your vivid imagery.
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2002-09-12 03:45 PM


A powerful write, a painful read, but oh the aftershock....*silence* now from me.
EarthenSoul
Member
since 2002-05-30
Posts 163
WA, USA
4 posted 2002-09-12 03:50 PM


Very strong and stinging!  Incredible display of emotion.  Harsh, but just.  Good write!
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
5 posted 2002-09-12 04:13 PM


This poem is not only a strong, dark piece but it depicts in the truest form, how some feel when someone dies that wastest their entire life being the way they were, and how it affected others.  Wow Richard, this was truly an excellent piece of poetry and I loved the chosen dialect you used as well.  Of course, the rhyme was sublime as usual.  

The most valuable thing you own is a smile, wear it, and share it.
Sharon    

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2002-09-12 04:33 PM


Richard

Depression steals the ability to see beyond the self to the waste and the pain of a foolish act.  With a bitter tongue you paint your feelings so well.  

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