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Open Poetry #22
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Summer Surrender........A Choka Poem
| Open Poetry #22 |
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Summer Surrender........A Choka Poem |
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CSKpoet Senior Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 845Island in Paradise 
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lightning’s blue white flash brightens night with fireworks complete with thunder romantic evening with you fire reflecting lovelights in your ember eyes the voice of the storm echoes boldly through canyons as squall line arrives secure in your loving arms desires inflame as you whisper in my ear summer surrenders electrically persuaded fall starts with a bang the touch of your lips on mine hearts beating in sync electrifying passions inevitably fall proclaims it’s full intent trees moan in the wind entwined together as one rapturous moment crying out that I love you a distant thunder rain falls softly on the roof blanketed by clouds enfolded in sweet embrace dreaming together in the tender warmth of love Poetry is: Passion, imagination and intellect running together. Aloha with warmest regards, Cheryl Stewart Koomoa [This message has been edited by CSKpoet (09-04-2002 12:19 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 Cheryl Stewart Koomoa - All Rights Reserved | |||
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the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
So romantic Cold hands means a warm heart |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Sounds like it would be fun in the winter too...James |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
This choka was superbly done! I enjoyed the images and the mood created with this beautiful piece of writing. Linda |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
CSKpoet Very romantic, enjoyed. |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Very nicely done, Although not actually correct. The Choka ends with two sevens, like the Tanka. I do like the way you broke this up into simi-stanzas Aids the reader pick up the mood. Usually this form is all bunched together. Gloom |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
beautifully, softly romantic what is a choka poem? Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
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Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  (smiles) Awwwwwwww, this is soooooo beautifully romantic, sweet friend, I love it, and may you forever share each warm balmy summer sunrise and sunset with your love happily! (kiss on cheek) This is gorgeous, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Cheryl, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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CSKpoet Senior Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 845Island in Paradise |
To all: Thank you all for the time to read and give me a shout On re-reading the poem I stand correted in the way I presented the poem as choka in an improper form I was taught a little differently and as usual there are always discussions over what form is correct. Here is a link to one: http://www.ahapoetry.com/richtank.htm I was taught to do a tanka 57577 linked by 575 or by 757 omni stanzas and then another tanka and yes...ening in a tanka of 57577 which I did fail to do here..thanks for pointimg that out for me to edit. aloha and warm regards to all, Cher Poetry is: |
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