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Open Poetry #22
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Six Feet Beneath Sadness
| Open Poetry #22 |
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Six Feet Beneath Sadness |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL 
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When I woke up to rain this afternoon I knew that someone up there was crying for me flooding the world with all the tears I am stubbornly holding hostage inside my drowning heart. there is little comfort in the small things and I know that when flowers make me weep and fall shaking rather than find joy in them.. I know then that I have isolated myself from smiles. I woke up to rain this afternoon and someone was shedding the tears I don't want to open the gates for and I know that even the smallest comforts cannot shed light on all the gloom. I confess I am overwhelmed and can no longer bear this pack on my own and am bitter for being beaten rather than thankful that someone is there to carry it ever hovering and one self berating blow gives birth to a new one I am soon to be buried attending a funeral of a sick spirit I can no longer dance because I have become a puppet for sadness and the strings are tuat in their torture. "two hearts will build the foundation for one point of light |
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| © Copyright 2002 Jennifer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Moonlight Romeo 
since 2001-09-10
Posts 982The heart of you |
There is no burden so heavy that you have to carry it alone. There are also no tears that are shed that way either. Thank you. What light through yon window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
You portrayed such sadness, that my tears have now joined the ones falling from the sky. Linda |
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Such a sad piece ... share your burden. We are always here for you  Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Temptress, I had the need to post another reply. Since I read your poem, about 2 hours ago, I began to wonder if this was a portrayal of you and your feelings about your life right now. If so, keep talking to your friends here at PIP. Let the words and the feelings flow. We're here to listen---and enjoy your writing as well! Take care, Linda |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Jenn, This reminds me of one of my favorite Nine Inch Nails songs. I'd listen to the words he'd say. But in his voice I heard decay. The plastic face forced to portray. All the insides left cold and gray. There is a place that still remains. It eats the fear, it eats the pain. The sweetest price you'll have to pay. The day the whole world went away. Hope in the darkness, Mike |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Yes, wowow! A ton of thoughts and two tons of feel to them....I too hope that this is not your world at the moment...If so, you know we are here... |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Like this...the title says a lot about what to expect in the rest of the poem...James |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Gawd, Jen, I should read your poetry more often, I relate to this more than I could ever express...this is raw, powerful, brutally honest, and leaves that empty pit in the core of my stomach (and that's a compliment!)...excellent writing, you've moved me with this one~ Take care, Melissa~ "Poetry is not an opinion expressed... |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
"I am soon to be buried attending a funeral of a sick spirit I can no longer dance because I have become a puppet for sadness and the strings are tuat in their torture."  (big hugggssssss) Oh Jennifer, my heart goes out to you, I know this torturing feeling so very well too as I suffered it all throughout my boyhood but I also know being a witness of freedom that you too very soon will be cut free and like Pinocchio will find all his dreams come true and you will feel truly happy! (sigh) Keep believing in yourself, sweet friend, I believe in you, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jennifer, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you!' Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
I'm glad I read this before it popped off to page 2. A dynamic write of sadness. The title indeed says it all. I, with all the others, can only say, I hope this is not where you are right now. If so, please know, that at one time or another we have all been there. Not to negate the very real feelings you have placed here, simply to help you feel some kinship in your depth of dark thought. The White Rose~ |
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Ahh, Princess, very gentle smile. I come back to find the sadness over you, and yet, I know the smile is within, so let it out, for you are never alone... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
oh my, what pain here....very touching piece. |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
yes. . . this comes from deep within doesn't it??? that's what makes it so good. . . well done. . . -------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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