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Open Poetry #21
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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a

0 posted 2002-07-16 08:14 AM


One night last week Balladeer Bold,
Tried to rob a house,
He crept up to the window,
As quietly as a mouse.

Through the window, into the room,
Which led to a great long hall,
If he had known twas an old maid's home,
He'd never had paid the call.

About nine o'clock the old maid came,
"Oh I'm so tired," she said.
Thinking that all was well that night,
She forgot to check under the bed.

She took out her teeth and a big glass eye,
And the hair from the top of her head,
Balladeer had a frightening fit,
As he watched from under the bed.

The old maid reached for her great big gun,
And to Balladeer said;
"Young man if you don't marry me,
I'll blow off the top of your head."

Balladeer scoped out the room,
But saw no place to scoot,
He looked at the teeth and her big glass eye,
and said, "Woman for God's sake shoot!"



© Copyright 2002 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
1 posted 2002-07-16 09:01 AM


I'm not about to shoot! LOL At my age, I can't be picky. *G*

ROFL... thanks for the morning grins, sweets... I enjoyed very much!


Charisma
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
2 posted 2002-07-16 09:06 AM


oh my gosh......oh my....you made me laugh, did I betrayed Balladeer now? I adore him you know.... but this was a cute write.



Charisma


Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
3 posted 2002-07-16 09:14 AM


Toe darling boy, this is simply too funny, I love it, I adore these quips between you too, it has me in stitches.

Thanks for the smile Toe it goes beautifully with the sunshine here. It’s a beautiful day and this is a fabulous bit of writing. I love it utterly utterly love it. Big smiles here, and a round of applause


Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

Breathe through the heat of our desire
Thy coolness and they balm
Let sense be dumb let flesh retire
Speak through the earthquake wind and fire

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
4 posted 2002-07-16 09:20 AM


Toe,
some words of encouragement,which I've also posted on my poem in case you don't get back here.

your words have grace and sometimes poise
you use them up as little toys
you make us laugh and that's a gift
heal torn hearts when there's a rift
you show your wisdom hid by wit
and make us think and smile a bit
you take the words turn them around
and leave us rolling on the ground
don't underestimate the bathroom wall
it's needed here by  one and all
just remember if you go
I have that tribute I will show
The one that shows just what you're not
your reputation will be shot

Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Music Maker
Member
since 2002-07-07
Posts 152
THE ORIGINAL !!!!
5 posted 2002-07-16 12:50 PM


Hey!!!!
I am trying to make my reputation around this table as the comedian...Stop being funny!  Desist forthwith.
I loved this one, We all need a smile a day and I have had a good one here.
Thank you.
Kind thoughts,
John

Grass won't grow under feet that don't move.

Neeraja
Senior Member
since 2002-06-22
Posts 812
The Netherlands
6 posted 2002-07-16 01:41 PM


This is so funny!!!  I love poems like this!!!  


Neeraja

Goodknight
Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386
Ohio, USA
7 posted 2002-07-16 01:48 PM


a funny poem - thanks for the good laugh - Paul
Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
8 posted 2002-07-16 02:39 PM


LOL.....this is so cute, Mr.Toe.
When I was little, one time...my parents hired a babysitter to stay overnight and she took out her teeth and put them in a glass...
It scared me so much that I asked them never to have her babysit us again.....
~ hugs and false teeth

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
9 posted 2002-07-16 03:58 PM


That gal gave me the biggest scare
That I've had in my life.
It dawned on me that was Toe's house
And she was Toerag's wife!!!!

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
10 posted 2002-07-16 04:07 PM


Good response old 'deer....but ya see "old maid" there?.....Now then, I know you can write....but can ya read???????...LOL...good come back however....ya prick!!!
Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
11 posted 2002-07-16 05:40 PM



he he go on Toe, go on, I love them.

Balladeer needs stronger glasses won't he

Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
12 posted 2002-07-16 06:08 PM


Toe, if anyone could have an old maid as a wife it would be you!

Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
13 posted 2002-07-16 06:18 PM




(giggles in delight) Oh my gosh, you just crack me up, sweet friend, whatever are we going to do with you two? (smiles) This is delightful, sweet friend, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Toerag, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

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