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Open Poetry #21
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chase of the white ghost
| Open Poetry #21 |
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chase of the white ghost |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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as this worship gives him wing in whispered gasp of gargoyle chant he steals your words to sing give fire to the sacred burn summon Genie through the smoke watching wisp in glass vein churn dismay at sight of melting gold— combustion’s beauty breaking brain— Who knew that hell would be this cold? all other oaths are mere discard the sacred has become profane. life and love are disregard. as body becomes host a beast becoming deity— laughing as you chase white ghost. |
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| © Copyright 2002 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
 Cold hands means a warm heart |
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Blackdrake Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 83Depends on the day :) |
Makes me look for a coat ... Awesome :P Mysterious is the shadow, walking down the path of light. ~~ ¥ ~~ |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Just a little scarey, this. I am reading between the lines maybe, but still . . . Hope you are not as close to the dragon as it sounds. Like the write in any case. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I guess I need to clarify. I tend to write too vague. This was written for some friends...they lost custody of their children and everything they own due to crack cocaine. They are both recently out of rehab and struggling to stay "straight." He called the addiction, "chasing the white ghost" and this was inspired by our conversation. Sorry if this worried or offended anyone. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Inhaling exhales of the beast as this worship gives him wing in whispered gasp of gargoyle chant he steals your words to sing Set the diamond in steel wool give fire to the sacred burn summon Genie through the smoke watching wisp in glass vein churn Frigid lung as throat drips numb dismay at sight of melting gold combustion's beauty breaking brain Who knew that hell would be this cold? ======================================= sometimes your rhymes just knock the wind out of me.. beyond the inspire...beyond the theme...beyond the message... just looking at the write...the images...the metaphors..the personification ...the phrasing...the vocab..the alliterations ... the internal rhymes ...the flow...the expression and emotion.... and the poetic impact of it all ... yeah.....you knock me out.   Now for me some words come easy |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Yeah...what JM said.... |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Add my prayers of strength to yours sis... now if you had of said somethen about the dragon...then I would have known(without your explanation)...*grins* at me... love this heart of yours Karen... and? love you too!!! Tanya Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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Ron
Administrator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-05-19
Posts 8669Michigan, US |
all other oaths are mere discard Truth and beauty, standing side by side, have the power to open eyes and sometimes even to alter lives. Kudo, K.  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
*hand-over-heart* thank you, Ron. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
What JM said? ... damn straight rofl |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
It's sad that some lessons have to be learned the hard way. Excellent write my dear. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Who knew that hell would be this cold? Didn't you know that they installed air conditioning a couple of years ago, it got so crowded that even the boss couldn't stand the heat anymore. A great poem, Karen...  ~ hugs for the cool placeLyra |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Interesting...so hell is cold?...James |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Karen What JM said...(pretty please) and heart hugs to you for seeing into the pain of friends, with an open heart. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Yeah, what JM said... YOU m'dear have such a caring heart! ~Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Now be wedded to the pipe— all other oaths are mere discard the sacred has become profane. life and love are disregard. This poem is incredibly powerful, serene one. It reminds me of the tv commercial once run which showed a shrouded lady in white, representing cocaine, speaking to a line of pale boys. "Will you die for me?", she asked. "Yes, we will. We'll die for you.." "I knew you would", she whispered. This poem has the same impact. Wonderful work.... |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I want to thank everybody, but it feels a bit strange to say a thank you for writing about someone else's pain. (I too, have demons, but they go by different names...) and as a footnote? My friends were supposed to come visit tonight after they took care of the heartbreaking business of giving up legal custody of their three beautiful girls to a wonderful couple who has been their foster parents for two years. They didn't show.  More than anything, I wanted everyone to know that these are not horrible people. They are lovely people who made horrible choices. I pray they have the strength to make it through this terrible time--they have already shown they have the heart to do what is in the best interest of their children. I'm gonna go for now. I'm tired. And who knows? Maybe they will still call... |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
serenity, wonderful write... although sad in the meaning i'm getting from it. I see the wreck of addiction. Its nice to be back for a bit and read you again. Parker |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
What a backwards slide it must be! There is much sadness in your words but you packed them with a punch that drove the point home! Outstanding work serenity~ and a not so subtle reminder of what is important in our lives. |
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