»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #21
»
Short Thoughts [attempt at METERED verse]
| Open Poetry #21 |
|
Short Thoughts [attempt at METERED verse] |
|
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart 
|
Short Thoughts I have scratched this day at words that would play, But all works express my ineptitude, Along the road I would gambol my way In search of my own shining attitude. There is no gracefulness in my dis-ease, A mind that wanders in shadows of doubt, For it’s work that a poem needs to please And yet more difficult to pull it out. There are some who make it seem so easy, Their verse comes well and free of stress or strife And sense, it makes, in its light and breezy Musical tone: harmony, love and life Here I sit in my ponder so dreary That I would make the strongest seem weary, Though others have said it better than I: Toiling at Poems gives Poets a high. ~*~ "He that works and does some Poem, not he that Merely says one, is worthy of the name, Poet." -Thomas Carlyle, 1845 |
||
| © Copyright 2002 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  BRAVO!!! Wow, this is excellent, sweet friend, I am not that good with meter at all, but yet, even the great Shakespeare didn't ALWAYS write in perfect iambic pentameter! (big hugggssssss) I believe the best poems are always those that come out straight from the heart and not forced with meter or rhyme like some kind of song being attempted to sing but just a fragment of a concord, but actually when the meter and rhyme just seem to come out like a song sung! (sigh) This is very well-expressed, sweet friend, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karilea, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Karilea...m'friend... Have you ever seen me rhyme? Do I have a sense of rhythm? Noah just spoke in his reply to you about iambic pentameter!! I don't even know the meaning... I am ashamed to admit. Is it not alright to place hands on keys and let the words flow? I'll take my free verse any day... YOU on the other hand made this look so easy! So I guess, it's to each his own. ~Hugs YOU~ |
||
|
ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Great job! Liked the topic very much. ThisDiamond |
||
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
If I were to say it and not simply show it. I do so well know it. That you are a poet! I thought you did quite well....I could go back and disect it even further....But, mayhaps another time... Carlyle was right...and you are... So there! |
||
|
rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
You inspire me. Really. Sincerely, Reg |
||
|
catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
It does kind of make you high, doesn't it? I write rhymed semi easily, but to do free verse the way you do entirely escapes me. I like this style on you, by the way. Sandra |
||
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Karilea I know just what you mean..but then I'm sure you already knew that. You did good, girl!  |
||
|
Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I like this. . .now, you need to show me how you did it. . . well done. . . --------------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
||
|
Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
metered, not metered, who cares. Anytime you write it, it's wonderful. I just like to write 'em like I feel 'em..... Hugs sweet lady Enjoy life, this is NOT a dress rehearsal. |
||
|
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
||
|
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Kari, if your poem inspires one person - you. It is enough. I know the struggle to write or not write and to stretch myself over form but you express it so well. Keth Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
||
|
Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
As you know, I'm very much into rhyme and meter. Give me a holler sometime. You did good! Oh, but free verse, maybe you can help me out there. Deal?  [This message has been edited by Auguste (06-27-2002 06:39 PM).] |
||
|
suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
In keeping with your title, I'll simply say: EXCELLENT! *S* |
||
|
Bridget Shenachie Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056Kansas USA |
And you keep getting higher! Shenachie |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
