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Open Poetry #21
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ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA

0 posted 2002-06-25 05:08 PM





Boy, Doctor, Dog

In the end
it was an ostentatiously pure birthing-moment -
incisive clarity beyond reproach
the doctor with cracked and peeling stethoscopes
bending over a Huskie with minutely calibrated last breaths

young boy sitting, with unopened Tootsie Pop
drumming the candy against his terse leg,
blazing blood turning muddy brown on his jeans
with a singular vision of physician and pet in his eyes

that thud of mammal versus metal
more than just noise never to be forgotten
more than shadows of death felt through ears
he would hear that sound every time his attention waned
for the rest of his life
on streets
in movies
in cars
a chill in his internal wiring that would not thaw

Feverishly
the dog raged against darkness
Fervently the vet tugged inference from knowledge
both worked in tandem, to their own means

somehow, stress lured the boy into sleep

'til

the sound of his dog's greeting bark
woke him




© Copyright 2002 Picasso Lyrics - All Rights Reserved
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
1 posted 2002-06-25 05:09 PM


Really good....from beginning to end
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2002-06-25 05:14 PM


Awww Gawd Jeff..I have goosebumps!
This is so well done...it held me captive right through to the wonderful ending!
Love this one... for sure it's a..

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

darkling
Member
since 2001-08-28
Posts 90
altered state of mind
3 posted 2002-06-25 05:15 PM


a completely enjoyable read, thank you for writing.
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
4 posted 2002-06-25 05:23 PM


I thoroughly enjoyed this well told tale. *S* Great work!
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
5 posted 2002-06-25 05:27 PM


ShadowRider
Good write enjoyed the read.

Krissy
Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556
kent England
6 posted 2002-06-25 06:03 PM


Jeff my good friend, this is why I seek out your writing, this is why mum says if you read Jeff you will learn so much. And I do, this is excellent wonderful writing, so good I could see the whole scene. I knew each of the characters, I felt as if I’d met them individually. Like I’d built up a relationship with them, absolutely first class writing skills here. I love this and YOU are some writer.
  

Love and warm stuff
As always
Krissy

And while thy willing soul transpiers
at every pore with instant fires
Andrew Marvell 1621-1678

ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA
7 posted 2002-06-25 10:24 PM


Thankx, Y'all!  Every boy has defining moment in their life when they
witness death or the possibility, thereof.  Even though this poem was not
directly about me, i had several witnessings that i wish i had not seen.

Still...there is a reality lesson that cannot be taught except by experience.
and that is what this is all about
as well, simply,
love.

Thanks so much, again, and
may peace be your constant companion.

tSR

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
8 posted 2002-06-25 10:35 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Jeff, this is so very touching, sweet friend, I was crying all throughout this until the end when I was so happy to see the dog survived! (sad sigh) I have experienced so much death instances in my boyhood so I know this kind of heartache so much, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jeff, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
9 posted 2002-06-25 10:45 PM


A very special one, Jeff...

~ canine hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA
10 posted 2002-06-26 12:04 PM


Noah:  indeed, i know how you feel, that incredible sadness when a pet is hurt.
One day, not too long ago, my buddy, Batman (dare i not EVER call him a pet!)
came home with a huge hole punched in his dome.  Clear thru the bone, and
a most wonderful vet, thank God he was a good good friend as well, named Terry
fixed him and watched over him for several days till he healed.    I remember
a moment, when Batman was resting in a box on the seat next to me, that
he looked up to with me, his eyes wet (and people say animals can't cry),
and uttered a simple cry of thanks.  Ever since that day, Noah, Batman and I
have been inseperable.  and dang, if that cat doesn't talk my ears off to this day.
Most of the time i even know what he is saying.  but the bond was made from
that horrible experience, and now is one of the most special in my life.

Lyra, of the Honey-Sweet Chipmunk Fame:
thank you!  again, as always, wishing you great luck
on the upcoming lab results again, and just waiting for
you to be able to relax, and enjoy the seconds without fret.

Thankx y'all
and love back
when we are blessed to be loved.
Jeff

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
11 posted 2002-06-26 03:39 AM


Jeff,
this was a real couple camping experience. (too intense) I loved it
Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

12 posted 2002-06-26 06:26 AM


I'm a sucker for a happy endings Jeff.  This is so well told.  WELL DONE poet friend.

Enjoy life, this is NOT a dress rehearsal.

{on the wings of words are spirits fly...and our souls are free~me}


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
13 posted 2002-06-26 06:32 AM


Wonderful tale so enjoyable to read!
Dulcinea
Senior Member
since 2001-07-22
Posts 774
IN
14 posted 2002-06-26 09:53 AM


It is a sweet and uplifting story, I know I enjoyed it very much, as I do you! Beautifully done baby! A
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
15 posted 2002-06-26 03:20 PM


Jeff

You show all the value of learning from life lessons.  This was wonderful!

my3monkeytoes
Member
since 2002-05-11
Posts 152
In the Carolina Breeze
16 posted 2002-06-26 03:26 PM


I really liked your writing here, and the point of view of the little boy.  You don't have to be "a little boy" to relate.  Very good!

~Sydney McLean

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