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SmartChick
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-09-23

Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown

0 posted 2002-06-22 04:45 PM

Should I blame myself for all the drinking you do
I do not think you realize what you are doing, or
What you are sying to me that hurts me so much
My love for you was a love I had never felt before

So many things you have said to me, hurting me so deep
This love I once felt with you, I don't want to feel anymore
I wonder what I did do for you to treat me like you did
I should have listened to my head, not my heart for sure

I search my heart, inside and out trying to find the love
Trying to find the love I use to always have inside of me
It is so hard for me to believe that it really could be gone
But, when I look inside my heart, there is nothing I can see

Remembering how much love I use to feel for you back then
It is then that I start feeling so much guilt deep inside of me
I never told anyone the things you did to me, hurting my arm
All it took was just that one time to destroy my trust completely

I tried so hard to forgive you for the things you did out of anger
There was a time when you led me to believe you were really sorry
Wanting so much for things to work out, I tried to trust you again
I tried so hard to forget all of the things you had said and done to me

Being unable to forget all of the things you did, I tried to forgive you
Hoping that maybe you would eventually see what you were doing
The harm you had done to a relationship you had claimed to want
There are times you say you love me, but not enough to stop drinking

I think the love may still be there from, when I stuffed it so deep inside
Trying to protect myself from the pain I felt each time you would hurt me
The truth is, I think after going through all I have gone through with you
Never do I want to feel the love I felt with you, it is safer that way you see

By Sue 6-22-02

[This message has been edited by SmartChick (06-22-2002 04:50 PM).]

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

1 posted 2002-06-22 05:11 PM

(smiles) Oh Sue, this is wonderful, sweet friend, always search your heart and never trample among the tears of before but rather find what you yearn to find and apply it with promises today! (kiss on cheek) This is very heartfelt, sweet fried, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sue, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

2 posted 2002-06-22 05:22 PM

SuzieQ~
Very sad read ....
YOU are NOT to blame for anyone else's lack of control !

*Hugs* and friendship are all I have to offer~
I give you both~
*Love ya'
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

3 posted 2002-06-22 06:19 PM

enjoyed

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

4 posted 2002-06-23 01:04 AM

This is sad, powerful and beautifully written, Sue.....
The words of a strong woman...

~ hugs of strength

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

dgvarner
Member Elite

since 2000-05-13

Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida

5 posted 2002-06-23 01:36 AM

you are not to blame for anothers choice to drink...a lot of good people have a problem with alcohol..its very unfortunate...we learn to love them at the risk of being terribly hurt...

your pain and disappointment very well conveyed in this poem my friend..

hugs, g

~dgvarner/fallen rain~

"life is what happens while we're making other plans..." ;)

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-11-08

Posts 9269
Pennsylvania

6 posted 2002-06-23 01:53 AM

Your poetry is always heartfelt and lovely. I've been trying to contact you but all the e-mails are returned. It has something to do with my end. I don't know how to fix it, but i'll keep trying,
Meanwhile, keep writing!
It's great!
Liz

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