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Open Poetry #21
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Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455


0 posted 2002-06-21 08:24 PM




Time
to take brass ring
hand in hand

time
to get off the porch

(I know
I whined, incessantly
about being here
but now that I look around
it really is
a nice, harmless porch
real shady and cool
so, nevermind
I’m fine here)

time
to move
off paper
to the bar
thank god, for alcohol
trying to translate
where before
there was no
language barrier

how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold

time
to stop asking
have I found the key
to the heart you guard
so vigilantly

time
to act

someone’s going to need
to remind me
to breathe

Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely and complete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me

Lifehouse

© Copyright 2002 Duncan - All Rights Reserved
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
1 posted 2002-06-21 08:28 PM




(smiles) And now you will be reminded by us all again: YOU ARE A WONDERFUL AND LOVING PERSON AND WE ALL LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOR WHO YOU ARE!!! (big hugggsssssss) Now get off that patio and come dance with joy, sweet friend, this is wonderfully heartfelt, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Duncan, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
2 posted 2002-06-21 08:31 PM


This is so sensitive, Duncan....even the porch part...
Are you really going to get off that porch?
I guess its getting kinda hot to be sleeping out there...and the thunderstorms and all...

I vote for getting off the porch for now...

But you did write a very beautiful poem !

~ hugs for a porchsitter

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
3 posted 2002-06-21 08:39 PM


Duncan,

   I love your words   My favorite part?

"how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold"

   You blend so perfectly...  how do ya do it? lol.

Hugs,
Tara

"My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read"
     - Motley Crue, Home Sweet Home

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

4 posted 2002-06-21 09:21 PM



how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold

Oh Duncan, so very deep these words tonight. ......Hugs, well written stuff here.

I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance~~(Garth)


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

5 posted 2002-06-21 09:26 PM



time
to get off the porch
============================

how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold

time
to stop asking
have I found the key
to the heart you guard
so vigilantly

time
to act

someone's going to need
to remind me
to breathe
=========================


Thats my job... breathe baby...and then INHALE

No more moth lectures...no more pep talks...
time to push ya out the moth nest..push ya off the porch...
Ive told ya before...
heart on sleeve sincerety is all you need...
besides...youre a poet...how can she resist ya
Have a great time you two...relax ....
breathe.........


Breathing
Lifehouse

I'm finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don't really know what
I'm gonna do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back to the arms of grace


Chorus:
'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be, yeah...

Where I wanna be...




the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
6 posted 2002-06-21 09:27 PM


This is deep but great work.

Cold hands means a warm heart

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
7 posted 2002-06-21 10:52 PM


Keep breathing, it will be ok.
I like the nature of these poems, so much like having a little chat on the porch with you.
Sandra

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2002-06-21 10:54 PM



In....
out....
deep....
shallow....
breath...
then
foot forward...
steady...
pull other foot forward...
there you are
walking
breathing
living again....

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
9 posted 2002-06-21 10:58 PM


Yes Duncan...time to get off the porch and breathe!
Wonderful write as usual!
~Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Anvrill
Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710
in the interzone now
10 posted 2002-06-21 11:12 PM


Amazing title. It's so very Robert Smith.


Awesome poem, too, though I hope that you aren't caught in moods like this too often.

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
11 posted 2002-06-22 11:05 PM


Here's the one I was looking for when I stumbled upon your door!  

It's easy to get comfortable on that porch, in my case the patio, or where ever we go that makes us feel at home.

how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold

I liked that verse too~
Candid and direct with just the right touch.
How do you do that anyway?

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
12 posted 2002-06-22 11:28 PM


Love the message....sort of goes hand in hand
with getting off of the pot....

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
13 posted 2002-06-23 12:47 PM


  i especially love this line:

"someone’s going to need
to remind me
to breathe"

enjoyed!  
hugs, g

~dgvarner/fallen rain~

"life is what happens while we're making other plans..."  ;)

snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
14 posted 2002-06-23 01:54 AM


'how is it
distance bore a dream
reality must hold

time
to stop asking
have I found the key
to the heart you guard
so vigilantly

time
to act

someone’s going to need
to remind me
to breathe'

These definitely are great lines, Duncan...and getting off the porch is the hardest part, I understand that...great style...I really enjoyed it...

sp        

I've been down this road forever,
and the time has come to circle back home...

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

15 posted 2002-06-23 02:25 AM


(I know
I whined, incessantly
about being here
but now that I look around
it really is
a nice, harmless porch
real shady and cool
so, nevermind
I’m fine here)


Great writing PoetFriend...
Smiles2u
*~coco~*

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

16 posted 2002-06-23 01:34 PM


Just a quick note to say thanks everyone for the support and encouragement.  I highly recommend getting off the porch!  


Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely and complete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me

Lifehouse

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
17 posted 2002-06-23 07:39 PM


enjoyed
Tracey
Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding
18 posted 2002-06-23 07:41 PM


Do you remember writing this:
I am better on paper

And part of my response was:
(and somehow, though your writing is wonderful on paper, I think you'd be better in person )

Damn, I love being right!! Lol.

time
to stop asking
have I found the key
to the heart you guard
so vigilantly

Don’t know how you found it, but glad ya did darlin  

(and yep, thank god for alcohol…cept when someone spills it all over their pants



Everything is possible in the game of life
    (Simple Minds-Promised You a Miracle)

[This message has been edited by Tracey (06-23-2002 07:42 PM).]

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