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ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2002-06-13 04:52 PM

Oh selected suitor
you may offer the world
exhibit 'love'...
the stuff eternally put to test....
you know contention

some of you are born with silver spoons...
you know possessions

and don coats aglow with golden threads
you know the passion

yet the fortunate choose correctly
you know discretion

if only perennial choices
were as easy as jingling copper coins
you know the explanation..

[This message has been edited by ecrivan (06-13-2002 04:58 PM).]

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

1 posted 2002-06-13 05:14 PM

I love your rhyme scheme in this one, Martin. Well done.

Nan

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

2 posted 2002-06-13 05:17 PM

Thanks for sharing, Nan

poetic hugs

baerlon
Member

since 2000-01-14

Posts 197
Youngstown and East Liverpool, Ohio, USA

3 posted 2002-06-13 09:27 PM

I like how you wrote this one, it flows nicely. thx for the read

There's a peace inside us all
Let it be your friend
It will help you carry on
In the end
There's a peace inside us all
-Creed

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

4 posted 2002-06-13 09:32 PM

I like the message that is woven into the text..and used this Greek legend as a backdrop, thanks for sharing

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-05

Posts 8296
Michigan

5 posted 2002-06-13 10:10 PM

This is so beautifully done, Martin...it carries a very important message and I love the rhyme scheme.

~ hugs of....excellence

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled" Gwendolyn Brooks

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

6 posted 2002-06-13 11:08 PM

I always enjoy the topics you choose, challenging and poignant.
I have noted a sharp edge, somewhat unemotional account(I think pragmatic) kind of dialogue to your style.
Very interesting and refreshing. What is so clearly evident, is that the poet is never unemotional. Well done. ThisDiamond

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

7 posted 2002-06-14 12:07 PM

Hi Diamond,

I'm at stage when I want some socio-philosophical arguements to color my poems..they take on this unemotional charge making them more analytical then my earlier writes. Rhyming is now secondary to message..thanks for sharing your observations.

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

8 posted 2002-06-14 12:17 PM

Hi Lyra,

there's a message there, yes...thanks to the lady that was courted when her hubby went off
to battle.

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