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brian madden
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since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland

0 posted 2002-10-03 03:49 PM


Calling anyone crazy enough to take up this challenge,
I would like to duet, write a poem, with any poet from any forum. I would like to write with someone who I haven't written with before.
I am not fussy when it comes to a subject matter,  
I would prefer to write in free verse.
So if anyone's up for the challenge leave your answer here or e-mail me with ideas or what you would like to write about.

El riesgo vive siempre!

© Copyright 2002 brian madden - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

1 posted 2002-10-03 05:35 PM


hey Brian...I usually sing off key and half a beat off tempo... not sure I'd be a fit duet for anyone... (chuckling)

Let's see who steps up..if no one else will ( which I doubt seriously) then we'll talk...

Janet Marie
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since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2002-10-03 06:01 PM


quote:
I would like to write with someone who I haven't written with before










LOL

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
3 posted 2002-10-03 06:38 PM


Cpat, I can't sing full stop and either am I perfect duet material myself. I here if you want to talk.

Eve, we'll always be partners in rhyme, you bet we'll be writing together soon, that is not a request its an order.

El riesgo vive siempre!

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2002-10-03 06:52 PM


brian

I tried to email you, but it turned me down.   


brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
5 posted 2002-10-03 07:48 PM


Martie, it is probably this darn hotmail account I have. It has blocked me outat the moment, I'll e-mail you from one of my other e-mail addresses.

El riesgo vive siempre!

Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

6 posted 2002-10-09 08:55 AM


Brian... pick a subject and start a few lines....post em here and I'll add to them...or you can work off of this to start.


Internal algorithms
computed my reactions
but lacked the probability
the outcome would be positive

Instead the equations
held too many variables:

your eyes
your smile
the curve of throat


Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 2002-10-09 09:17 AM



Bri...a duet?
Free Verse?
Heaven!

bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

8 posted 2002-10-09 12:53 PM


I dunno, Ron. That thought's pretty complete as is...

Post it?

Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2002-10-09 02:06 PM


Yeah Mike, that's the reason I don't write well with others... I have a hard time leaving a thought uncompleted. This could be added to easily enough, but being a fan of minimalism myself, I agree it is fairly complete. Could be strengthened with a change of ending words and actually contrast more with the mathmatical referemces that it begins with. Emotions of course are not mathmatical but they can be related to equations with many variables... no matter how we start out trying to be logical about them, they end up being somewhat subjective.

Perhaps it should read

Internal algorithms
calculated my reactions
but lacked the probability
of a definitive solution

As the equations
held too many variables:

your eyes
the curve of throat
the swell of breast

Ah well... he would do much better to Duet with Sunshine...as she is much more versatile than I am when it comes to changing voice..


brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
10 posted 2002-10-09 02:42 PM


your eyes
your smile
the curve of throat,
a hook line in my heart.
Your mouth that sings in every note,
your feet that tap on pavements, wet
hair that flutters in the breeze,
the beating of your heart to mine,
closer, closer ever yearning,
you silken kiss, your feathered mane,
your bark, your bite, your sniff
your snarl, your the best doggie in the world. NOw go fetch the newspaper, that's a good girl.

==========
Possibly the worst poem I have written, in under five mins.  

El riesgo vive siempre!

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
11 posted 2002-10-09 02:53 PM


Ron, I am sorry I wasted those good lines,
the other lines I really like, I could see each of them forming the start of a verse.
ALas I am so tired these days that my writing is suffering. IF you don't mind I will sleep on these and see if inspiration will spring forth. Do what Mikey said, post it as a complete poem.

Karilea, is that a yes to duet? Would love to, you know the addy. E me and we'll chat.


Ron, I was wondering have you read JG Ballard's "atrocity exhibition." He writes about the body as it it part of the room, landscape. There is a paragraph where he talks about a billboard, of a woman in a sensual pose and how it appears as an abstract form. Not sure if I am making sense, anyway it reminded me slightly of your approach here.

El riesgo vive siempre!

Crazy Eddie
Member
since 2002-09-14
Posts 178

12 posted 2002-10-09 03:04 PM



No, I’m not good enough, spoiling my own poems is one thing but dragging another persons words with me seems a little unfair.

Saying that I have to admit that duets and how the poetic process of two minds creating one poem works has always intrigued me.

If you’re willing to put up with an out of tune voice I’ll give it a try.

Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

13 posted 2002-10-09 03:13 PM


Brian,
No I have not read that... but the body as a landscape is what many photogrophers have tried to illustrate with black and white nudes, a naked back becoming a desert landscape half lit. I'll have to look it up and see what I have been missing. There is much to be said about the objectivity in composing a poem or an image, and how that in the end even the most logical or staged approach can take on various levels of meaning that go far beyond what was originally intended...

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
14 posted 2002-10-10 05:57 PM


Eddie, I am game for a duet, just let me finish this dance with Karilea first though

El riesgo vive siempre!

Crazy Eddie
Member
since 2002-09-14
Posts 178

15 posted 2002-10-10 06:26 PM



Drop me a line when the music stops.

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