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Poetry Challenge!
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Poet deVine
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Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

0 posted 2001-11-18 07:04 PM




Well, my friends! Gather near, I have a challenge for you. This will test your skill and your patience. Right here we have a challenge, it will either make you or break you. First you must promise that you won't cheat!!!  Ok..

A poet named John Clare, wrote a poem called "What is Life?"

I've deleted all but the last word of each line.

Your challenge? Write a poem using those exact words as a last word of each line. They must be in this order and you cannot find the poem BEFORE you write your own? Ok????

Good luck!!


What is Life?
by John Clare


run,
sun,
dream.
thought.
stream,
nought.

morn,
lawn,
dies;
thorn,
disguise.

unfound?
sound?
crave.
abound?
grave.

disguise,
be;
eyes
vanity.
undergo,
prize
know,
skies.


[This message has been edited by Poet deVine (edited 11-18-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved
Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551
Pennsylvania
1 posted 2001-11-18 09:59 PM


This was really tough, but I gave it a shot.

Through this life so many run,
missing their moment in the sun.
Don't bother to chase their dream,
just press on without a thought.
Watching hope float down a stream,
all the hard work gone for nought.

And when tomorrow's morn,
streams brilliantly across their lawn,
their tedious life does die.
The rose is seen, not the thorn,
Life is a blessing in disguise.

Still treasures go unfound,
passing us by without a sound.
Some say materials, they crave
Possessions must abound.
yet none shall follow to the grave.

Life is a blessing in disguise.
Never what it seems to be,
Within someone else's eyes,
You may be a model of vanity.
Until a change you undergo
And you win the only prize,
Only then will you finally know
How to appreciate the skies.

~Susie

~*~Born to Blossom and Bloom to Perish~*~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

2 posted 2001-11-19 01:13 PM


A marathon that must be run,
in the midday broiling sun,
for an oasis I do dream,
lush greenery of thought.
I thirst to partake of its stream
all sanctuary being nought.

Every breath a brand new morn
sand of desert be my lawn,
even now the cacti dies;
the spikes of thorn
in cruel disguise.

Shall I stay ever unfound?
Never my ears hear the sound?
Of the water that I crave.
Where does the fruit of life abound?
I fear it rests in my own grave.

Unless this all be mere disguise,
and paradise around me be;
clear the sandstorm from my eyes
and save me from my vanity.
Much more miles to undergo
should heaven be a good man's prize
miles of sand is all I know
and pray for rainclouds in the skies.

[This message has been edited by serenity (edited 11-19-2001).]

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2001-11-19 01:36 PM


laughing now...just looked it up...there goes my career as a psychic poet!  
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2001-11-20 09:37 AM


From this ache of alone ... I can never run ...
it owns my soul from rise and set of golden sun,
no solace found in a dark night's dream ...
for the blue moon brought this ache of you in thought.
As the stars fall in shimmering silent stream ...
my wishes upon ... are all for nought.

This ache will usher in the first light of morn,
as the dawn dances 'cross the dew drenched lawn.
Like the sun's promised rise, this ache of alone never dies.
To a curse I was born, my heart pricked on black rose's thorn.
Morn's respite offers only alibis ... not even midnight could disguise.

Will true commitment remain unfound?
When dreams die slow ... do they make a sound?
For all my life there has only been this constant crave.
Will contentment's touch ever abound?
Only love can save ... for I fear I'll take this ache to my grave.

Till then I wear this poets disguise,
for in rhyme the me you see ... is all I'll never be.
Would you look upon me with forgiving eyes ...
see beyond the profanity ... look behind the vanity.
This metamorphosis of truth we all must undergo,
unconditional love could be the prize ...
release from alone ... an ache no one should know,
a moth reborn a butterfly ... flying free towards Heavens skies.

~~~~~~~~~

thanks for the cool challenge Sharon...my muse needs a good swift kick now and then  
Im going to find John Clare's version now... see how much damage I did to his rhymes  


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2001-11-20 10:24 AM


What is Life?
by John Clare

What is Life

opportunistic run,
given sun,
once but dream.
tender thought.
still runs the stream,
all for naught.

lo the coming of morn,
robin breaks fast the lawn,
someone must, then dies;
rosy once this thorn,
thin now its disguise.

were all thoughts thus unfound?
where in silence is the sound?
once the lust was but a crave.
was it I who once abound?
lonely comes the grave.

simple disguise,
take this mask that be;
my eyes
less vanity.
as all surprise would undergo,
that which be held “prize”
this I truly know,
only birds fill skies.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

6 posted 2001-11-20 10:35 AM


I love all these different twists you guys have taken on this theme ....
its very interesting to see each poets influence on the inspire...
everyone has lots of great imagery too...
Angel..yours has a lovely theme of hope  
Sen...classic yearn baby  
and Sun...of course--classic K-optimisim  
and Sharon...that poem is waaaay COOL...
thank you for introducing me to it.  

I would wait till the end of time for you,
Then do it all again ... it's true.
I can't measure my love for you,
There's nothing to compare it to.

Daemonyin
Junior Member
since 2001-11-24
Posts 31

7 posted 2001-11-24 02:51 AM


Where is it to that I run,
underground, away from the sun,
and safe but dead from a dream.
I wanna live life, and not live thought.
So, can I kiss the mouth of the open stream,
or do I die bitter; assume its all for nought

I wake up now only to resent the new morn,
the radiant sun, the freshly mowed lawn,
and all the life inside me that dies;
to live now with but a thorn,
would require a shady disguise.

Why is it my shadow's left unfound?
Why am I too weak to scream a sound?
To prove it is merely life that I crave.
Why can't I possess what other retain abound?
I cannot exist within this self-dug grave.

So what now, do I accept a disguise,
to show a used preconception of what to be;
Oh, I must see the reflection of these eyes
that speak sadly of the nightmare of vanity.
I shall decay, no plans will I undergo,
to obtain the widely held golden prize,
that I will never see contained in blue skies


I'm sorry if this sucked.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2001-11-24 10:27 AM


Daemonyin....
first of all nothing about that poem "sucked"
you did a fantastic job of the phrasing and using the words given in the challenge.
Youve penned a bittersweet beauty...
a melancholy masterpiece  

Welcome to Passions  ... theres many forums here to participate in...
Open 17 as well as the others on the
main forums page are where your poetry posts will get the most feedback.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
take care
jm

"If I could fly ... I'd pick you up ... I'd take you into the night ...
and show you a love like you've never seen ... ever seen" ... ohoh ...

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
9 posted 2001-11-24 10:39 AM


Wow! This is great! I love each of these (Sven posted his in Open). It's amazing what you can do with words isn't it? I hope you'll all go read John Clare's poem.

Would you like another one? Maybe Janet could choose the next one...what do you think?

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
10 posted 2001-11-24 12:08 PM



Seeking to lose myself in rat race run,
hiding ‘neath a cloud from honesty’s sun,
my life nearer a nightmare than a dream.
Who would have thought.
In passion’s stream,
I am nought.

Dread of morn,
paper on the lawn,
another day dies;
by prick of thorn,
and still I wear this disguise.

Is life lost then become unfound?
Are my screams of pain the only sound?
In this quiet solitude I crave.
Does life and pain live abound?
Until I rest within that grave.

Who can see me in this disguise,
knowing all that I may be;
look then beyond the eyes
behind the vanity.
With all this that I undergo,
I seek no greater prize
that one man’s love yet to know,
’neath winter’s darkened skies.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

11 posted 2001-11-24 10:29 PM


Oh so ya turn the tables on me huh?  
Ok...I guess I asked for it...always whining bout me moody muse   *L*
Ill give her another swift kick and see what she can come up with....
let me (and this slow, tired computer) see what we can find and I'll be back.
(hopefully)
With this comp I make no promises  
later-lovetorhyme-gators  

"If I could fly ... I'd pick you up ... I'd take you into the night ...
and show you a love like you've never seen ... ever seen" ... ohoh ...

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
12 posted 2001-11-25 08:06 AM



Sharon, you grab one leg, I'll grab the other, and we'll force JanetMarie's muse to take heed...

so, JM, where's the challenge?  Waiting....and tapping foot....

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

13 posted 2001-11-25 02:40 PM


UMMMMM you girlies better be careful...
I might just like that    

OK OK...stop tapping those toes...
sorry to keep your pens waiting...
My computer is really having fits today...
everything I try to load kicks me off-line.
anyway...Im gonna give ya two choices ...
hey Im a gemini..cant make up my two minds  

Two of my fave poems are:

"Nothing Gold Can Stay"; by:Robert Frost
"On a Poet's Lips I Slept"; by: Percy Bysshe Shelley

So on the idea of Poet D's challenge...
use the last word of each line in Frost's poem to write yours.......
OR I "uped the anty" a bit with the second poem...
You have to use the FIRST and LAST word of each line to write your version.
If you choose the Frost poem ... try to write in his the theme of how "fragile and fleeting" are the moments and gifts we are given

Nothing Gold Can Stay
by:Robert Frost

gold
hold.
flower;
hour.
leaf.
grief,
day.
stay.

On a Poet's Lips I Slept
by: Percy Bysshe Shelley

On..........................slept
Dreaming.................adept
In ............................kept;
Nor ..........................blisses,
But...........................kisses
Of.............................wildernesses.
He.............................gloom
The............................illume
The............................bloom,
Nor.............................be;
But.............................can
Forms..........................man,
Nurslings.....................immortality!
One.............................me,
And..............................thee.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Have fun...or not  
And computer allowing....I'll be back  

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
14 posted 2001-11-25 03:00 PM


Ok..I'm taking the Shelley challenge!!
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
15 posted 2001-11-25 03:06 PM


Ok..but this sucks swamp water!!! LOL


On beds of roses, there we slept
Dreaming dreams of written words adept
In secret our Thesaurus we kept;
Nor would the forum know our blisses,
But behind the rhyme our poetic kisses
Of fumblings in our wildernesses.
He pronounced with dread of gloom
The forum shall soon be all illume
The love we hid must forever bloom,
Nor can we in all honesty be;
But behind the veil of internet he can
Forms passions for each woman, each man,
Nurslings of our immortality!
One poet me,
And one poet, thee.


Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
16 posted 2001-11-25 03:10 PM


And the Frost poem:


He thought of life in terms of gold
its glitter was all he yearned to hold.
He counted coin and missed a flower;
he counted time by dollar not hour.
Then time when gold of falling leaf.
At end of life gave cause for grief,
and thus upon his last earthly day.
He wished for time so he could stay.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

17 posted 2001-11-26 08:02 PM


Sharon those DO NOT suck anything....
I love them both ... and you gave the Frost one the perfect touch of theme.
AND??? This must not be much of a challenge seeing your posting time from mine...
your muse needs to talk to mine  
thanks for playing poetry with me  

OK SUN??? Where are you???
Now Im tapping my foot LOL  

he said ... "dont cry" ...
said "it only hurts forever ... and all we have is time."

~Tabitha's Secret~

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
18 posted 2001-11-27 07:57 PM




More please! I need more!

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

19 posted 2001-11-27 09:30 PM


LOL@Sharon....in need of a muse fixx huh?
OK...heres one of my all time most fave poems...
Lets see if this is more of a challenge than those were for you  LOL.........


try this..I left some extra words in to see if that made it anymore interesting...
(if thats allowed? If not go ahead and do like we were before in the other challenges)
and using all the saints names are optional lol


L'Envoi
by: Rudyard Kipling

When Earth's .........dried,
When .................died,
We ..................... two,
Till .......................anew!
And ......................chair;
They shall ............. hair;
They shall ...............(Magdalene, Peter, and) Paul;
They shall ................all!
And ..........................blame;
And ..........................fame,
But ............................star,
Shall ......................... are!
~~~~~~~~~

and anyone who hasnt seen this beautiful poem...check it out at a poetry search engine or email me and I'll send it to you...its a very cool poem.



he said ... "dont cry" ...
said "it only hurts forever ... and all we have is time."

~Tabitha's Secret~

[This message has been edited by Janet Marie (edited 11-27-2001).]

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
20 posted 2001-11-27 09:47 PM


I'll take that challenge..
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
21 posted 2001-11-27 09:58 PM


When Earth's last tears are finally dried,
When man’s hate for man has at last died,
We realize we began as only two,
Till each generation began anew!
And from that golden heavenly chair;
They feel the softness of Angel hair;
They shall sit beside Magdalene, Peter, and Paul;
They shall have nothing yet have it all!
And who are we then going to blame;
And who among us will still seek fame,
But no longer will we seek that star,
Shall we then realize that we are!



Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

22 posted 2001-11-28 01:59 PM


LOL...what challenge??...
ya ate that up like cake and ice cream  
very cool poetess devine...you kept it real close to Rudys theme...ya did the Kip-man proud *L*

Ive loved that poem since highschool ...
had it framed in my room  

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
23 posted 2001-11-28 02:18 PM


could you send it to me Janet?  
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

24 posted 2001-11-28 08:31 PM


its on its way  
Mysteria
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since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
25 posted 2001-12-14 01:46 AM


HA! I won't give up my day job   I just felt like having a bit of fun!  


Love can turn to fools gold,
precious is the heart you hold.
Unless tended like a fragile flower,
a true love can wilt within an hour.
With no life force to a dying leaf,
it drowns in salty tears of grief,
There is no chance another day,

~*~  May the spirit of this season live in your heart all year through ~*~


Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
26 posted 2001-12-14 08:58 AM


HEY! You did good!!!    

It's not as easy as one may think....

Dusk Treader
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 1187
St. Paul, MN
27 posted 2001-12-17 10:59 PM


Wow! This is a lot of fun! I tried my hand at the first challenge poem and loved it. And it's great to see how different mine is from everybody elses. Such wonderful writing I see! Here's mine.. late as always, LOL but I can't resist  

With light I run
Gift of saffron sun,
Shades of a dream.
Splintered thought.
Words in a stream,
Speak but say nought

Of golden morn
on a verdant lawn
Childish heart dies;
Long distasteful thorn,
A wonder in disguise.

What has gone unfound?
In word, music or sound?
Unworldly enchantment I crave.
Does magic abound?
Wonder must be ere grave.

Lost in our disguise,
Can we simply be;
A young gleam in our eyes
Cleansed of vanity.
Metamorphosis we undergo,
Painted wings our prize
Secrets we know,
Sweet earth yearned from skies.

"A hard, cold wisom is required for goodness to accomplish good. Goodness without wisdom always accomplishes evil" - Robert Heinlein

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
28 posted 2001-12-18 12:21 PM


Go ahead Abe - YOU find us one now!! I loved yours...it's both confining because you must use the end word..and inspiring..you have the THINK!!    
Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
29 posted 2001-12-20 08:15 PM


Shoot, pressed the wrong button, posted it as a new topic by mistake.

Can't do anything right tonight it seems.

Love all your poems

Titia

A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess...
Want to use the pics on my website? Just send me a mail and I'll give you the link.

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
30 posted 2001-12-21 08:55 PM


Hey you guys, I like challenges. But, I'm not as good as you guys, so I think I will just read all of yall's poems.
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