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ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

0 posted 2002-06-07 09:41 AM


With three ex-wives expelled from mind.
In sullen space he loomed and moped
his distant memories mulled in smoke,
with pillars of distaste inside.
But every day his heart evoked
silent thoughts of love regained
a search for happiness through pain.

Filled flush with wealth under his roof
true to a fault with money's hope
enticing minds with regal show
and words to pitch his worth aloof.
His song would trap a callow soul,
with flash of kindness in deceit
a merchant of contrived relief.

But when she came one month, to clean,
The darkness of his thoughts went dry,
then sunward went his soul on high
and filled with life his heart broke free!
The shadows of his latter pride
were lit with daylight and unchained
from the guileness of his game.

Then, too, she brought his faith to swell.
His needs beheld in her sweet face
uplifted by her tender grace.
On him, like gentle rain she fell
to water wisdom once displaced.
He offered her his wealth and fame
and at her feet he threw his gain.

He watched her soft eyes slowly drop
Stoned innocence filled her light laugh
then she spoke pure unabashed
deep words of love spilled from her thoughts.
He heard a river's length of love to last,
about her boyfriend and their plans
and her eyes glowed solely for her man.

Through years of trading he had fought
where friends were shallow, fierce and dim
where all the world was made to win
and render profits at all cost.
Yet this songbird sang over him
from her nest of silver dreams
and left him helpless and unclean.  

The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up
spaces of consciousness and resistance; to language oppressions; to
re-language historie

© Copyright 2002 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved
Magnus
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Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
1 posted 2002-06-07 10:15 AM


This is awesome....If I read it right...

A man,  not very nice...deceitful,  

finds a woman who he desperately wants...

Yet,  finds he may not have her...for she
has already found love...

And there he is...dashed...even with all of
his ill earned wealth...

Am I close...

This is outstanding ET...

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
2 posted 2002-06-07 10:17 AM


You're right on Magnus!!     Thanks for taking the time to read this and for the encouraging comments...Much appreciated!!
bags123
Member
since 2002-06-06
Posts 128

3 posted 2002-06-07 10:18 AM


This is a wonderful,powerful piece. I love poems that draw you into the story, and have almost a moral as an ending to leave you thinking. Good work!
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
4 posted 2002-06-07 10:31 AM


nice
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
5 posted 2002-06-07 11:30 AM


Thanks Bags for the comments....I appreciate!

Vandana....I thank you for dropping in to read this!!

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2002-06-07 11:38 AM


Eric

A wonderful story poem...with deeper meaning about what's important.  Have you ever written a story in other forms?  I think you would be very good at it.  

Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2002-06-07 04:22 PM


ah yes. . . to have all. . . and yet. . . to have nothing. . .

well done Sir. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
8 posted 2002-06-07 06:50 PM




(big huggsssssss) Oh Eric, though I haven't ever encountered this situation, this is a feeling I am sure so many can relate to, and my heart cries out to them all when one loves someone so much but they already love another and love is sacrificed that way. (sad sigh) This is sad but beautiful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Eric, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
9 posted 2002-06-07 09:49 PM


That was.... wow... Awesome!
catalinamoon
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
10 posted 2002-06-07 09:59 PM


I really enjoy this style that you have. A story well told.
Sandra

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
11 posted 2002-06-08 04:56 AM


Martie...Yes I do write in other fields but never seem to have the time to complete anything...I thank you for the comments!

Thanks Sven....All the riches in the world can't buy true love!  

Thank you Noah you're always so kind!

Skyfire I want to thank you for the upbeat comment!

Cat moon I'm glad you like the format....Just something new I was trying.....Thanks for reading!!

The role of poetry is to utter the un-utterable; to open up
spaces of consciousness and resistance; to language oppressions; to
re-language historie

Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
12 posted 2002-06-09 09:10 AM


ETHome~
This is soooooooo well done~
You SHOULD make the time to complete more of these story poems~
This is very good~

'He watched her soft eyes slowly drop
Stoned innocence filled her light laugh
then she spoke pure unabashed
deep words of love spilled from her thoughts.
He heard a river's length of love to last,
about her boyfriend and their plans
and her eyes glowed solely for her man.'


What a wonderful testament to the lady's true love~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
         noles1@totcon.com                    

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
13 posted 2002-06-09 12:03 PM


Thank you Marge....Glad you dropped in to read this and I appreciate the positive comments!
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
14 posted 2002-06-09 10:03 PM


Thank you very much Marge, I appreciate your comments.
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