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Open Poetry #20
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Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455


0 posted 2002-05-23 02:50 AM



What would I give
to be us, again

I’d give up every story
of every woman
I ever loved

but we’re not
going to be
us, again

I hate the thought
of fading away
more than you know

I don’t want to learn
not to love you

when you wake up one morning
and I’ve gone

know…that is why

© Copyright 2002 Duncan - All Rights Reserved
Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
1 posted 2002-05-23 03:04 AM


Oh Duncan, from a woman's point of view this was absolutely spectacular writing. To leave before having to learn to not love someone is the best way to leave and this about covered that beautifully.  Enjoyed this and saved it in my library.

  

~* Carpe' Diem *~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2002-05-23 04:12 AM


I hate the fading away part also...James
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2002-05-23 07:08 AM



The idea that the thought of someone fades away is truly striking...for so many of us search so hard for ways of keeping that from happening...[yes, I'm taking this reading on a different level]

You do have a way with words, Duncan, and I for one am glad to read your poetry...

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
4 posted 2002-05-23 07:58 AM


I like how you gave it a twist at the end....That made it all for me!  Good work!
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

5 posted 2002-05-23 08:03 AM




nothing to say...you can have:

...

which actually says quite a lot. Hugs.

K

[This message has been edited by Severn (05-23-2002 08:04 AM).]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
6 posted 2002-05-23 08:57 AM


...so sad,
so final...
Well said Duncan.
~Morning Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2002-05-23 09:17 AM


Duncan,
Some how you sang it a different way, enjoyed

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2002-05-23 11:22 AM


I hate the thought
of fading away
more than you know

I don't want to learn
not to love you

=========================

hey D? when you learn how to do this..will ya teach a moth?

when my words fail me...I have one of the girls sing to ya.....


"I'd rather leave while I'm in love
while I still believe the meaning of the word
I'll keep my dreams and just pretend
that you and I are never gonna end" ...

"you see I need my
fantasy I still believe it's best
to leave while I'm in love."

Rita Coolidge
moth anthems baby...I got a million of them.
heart-hugs D
mothyme

How long can a girl be haunted by you ...
Soon I'll grow up and I wont even flinch at your name.

Alanis Morissette

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
9 posted 2002-05-23 01:31 PM


ah - gotta appreciate the sentiment here Duncan (as usual) - but think you're aiming high if you think you can learn to unlove.

Chris

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
10 posted 2002-05-23 01:37 PM


I don’t want to learn
not to love you

Your sensitivity is boldly showing here, Duncan...

but remember, that it really is better to have loved and lost than to never have experienced it at all.

~ loving sensitive hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
11 posted 2002-05-23 01:42 PM


whenever i hear that phrase, i always think of Men in Black... when Will Smith says "Better to have loved and lost..." and Tommy Lee Jones says "Try it."

just a thought.

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
12 posted 2002-05-23 02:30 PM


Oh my, this is so dead on. You have a way with heartfelt words.
Sandra

Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
13 posted 2002-05-23 03:08 PM


Oh that tore my heart out. Well written indeed!
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