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Open Poetry #20
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Oceanus
Junior Member
since 2002-01-18
Posts 10
The Pacific

0 posted 2002-05-18 07:40 PM


Author's Note:This is an early attempt at writting in the Haiku style.By no means do I consider myself a master at this art.It is refreshing and challenging to write a poem in this style, though!I highly reccomend that you try this sometime, at least as an exercise in the improvement of your craft.

-Oceanus-


The green canopy.
In the forest shade, dreaming.
Streams flow through my mind.
§
A kingdom of birds.
Their uplifting music heals.
The sound has new life.
§
Silver, earthy coins.
Who left these striking signs here?
The forest treasure.
§
A sanctuary.
A prison fit for a king!
The forest reigns long.


© Copyright 2002 Oceanus - All Rights Reserved
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
1 posted 2002-05-18 08:03 PM


These were absolutely beautiful, and I put them into my library as I love haikus.  Thank you for sharing them with us.

  
~* Carpe' Diem *~

Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
2 posted 2002-05-18 09:58 PM






(smiles) Awwwwwww, I love this, sweet friend, I just love the thought of envisioning the forest as a prison fit for  a king, like being incarcerated in beauty and bliss forever! (big hugggsssss) This is breathtaking, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Oceanus, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2002-05-18 10:10 PM


Invisible wind
I know where you are, when the
Soft willows curtsey.


~Enjoyed so much. Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

elfin_tigress
Member
since 2002-05-15
Posts 101
Someplace
4 posted 2002-05-18 10:49 PM


"A prison fit for a king!"
Amen to that, Oceanus!  I am always very happy where there are trees, and this poem brought me there.
I didn't quite understand the statement of the "silver, earthy coins," but it flowed well with its statement, in the imagery the stanza made.  
Very nice how you throw your reader right into the setting at the first line of the first stanza.  You seem to have quite a talent for that.
I look forward to reading more from you.

Ivy Rose
Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300
MA, USA
5 posted 2002-05-19 12:23 PM


Great work, Oceanus!!!!  Really top-notch Haiku.  Beautiful as well as succinct.

***Ivy Rose

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