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Open Poetry #20
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Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California

0 posted 2002-05-08 09:24 PM



          Amazed

She fastened herself to the ground with her eyes,
for she had come a long way
to sit on this cold bench in the middle of the trees
with the sounds of unseen things in leaves,  the crash
from the place with the fragrance of ice plant,
the constant and hypnotic ocean’s rant.

She carried a small flashlight,
enough to see a bit of dirt and her feet,
enough to see the halo of her surroundings,
round pieces of tree, all else was dark.

She was waiting for a familiar whisper to feather across her,
but the sounds her heart made on the wall of her chest
were so loud that she was afraid she would miss it.
Everything was so different at night, even a dear face
could trip and fall on some fear and become brittle,
could break the fragile hold she had on love
and send it off like a shooting star.

She looked up as a flurry disturbed the air
and touched a tendril of her hair with a shiver
and then he was there beside her in warm sliding
and she took a breath of salt and time
that was almost like drowning.

The moon came from behind doubt to sing,
and lit the forest pewter as she turned into his gaze,
and all the forest watched, eyes open, amazed,
as he wrapped her in his soft enfold  
and flew away with her love wrapped in his wings.
----------
Dave's not quite so simple and easy as the last one challange

© Copyright 2002 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Magnus
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since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
1 posted 2002-05-08 09:32 PM


Martie...challenge or not....this is
something to read,  and to visualize as one
reads it.  I am beginning to understand your
poetry better,  and with each reading...
Well...simply said...it gets better and
better....

Thanx,

Barry

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
2 posted 2002-05-08 09:40 PM




(smiles) YAY!!! Oh my gosh, this is soooooo lovely, sweet friend, just the thought of being enfolded into loves wings and swept away always makes me smile! (kiss on cheek) I've never heard of this challenge but I'm going to go check it out, sweet friend, this is lovely, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Martie, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Balladeer
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since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
3 posted 2002-05-08 09:51 PM


Looks like you made it easy enough to me, Martie....a perfect one-act play
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
4 posted 2002-05-08 09:52 PM


The tone of this a chapter from my heart...I am always so inspired by your infinite grace.
ThisDiamond

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2002-05-08 10:06 PM


...Enchanting...

Ivy Rose
Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300
MA, USA
6 posted 2002-05-08 11:06 PM


Martie...Fantastic imagery!!!!! Very vivid and emotionally embued.

***Ivy Rose

NapalmsConstantlyConfused
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Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 529

7 posted 2002-05-09 04:09 AM


challenge met, indeed. great write, dear lady. our honor is brightened, as people used to say, back when people said things like that.
-Dave

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
8 posted 2002-05-09 06:10 AM


well penned ms martie
enjoyed the images
looking up the sky
the way you do

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
9 posted 2002-05-09 06:46 AM


A superb write
An exrardinary pen
Exquisite, your mind
Liz

Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
10 posted 2002-05-09 06:49 AM



I haven't yet checked out Dave's
challenge...but something tells me
you did it just right!

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
11 posted 2002-05-09 08:49 AM


Your poetic visions invariably leave me utterly AMAZED, dear friend...
Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
12 posted 2002-05-09 09:03 AM


Martie,
You did it again. Loved it. Sy

Marsha
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since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
13 posted 2002-05-09 10:11 AM


Martie darling girl OH MY! Such an outstanding and wonderful piece of writing, I’ve read fabulous pieces from you before this is simply stunning. Truly you’ve outdone yourself darling girl.

This simply flows with the beauty of it all, wonderful in it’s language usage. Excellent writing from you absolutely excellent


Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

14 posted 2002-05-09 06:20 PM


Everything was so different at night, even a dear face
could trip and fall on some fear and become brittle,
could break the fragile hold she had on love
and send it off like a shooting star.

She looked up as a flurry disturbed the air
and touched a tendril of her hair with a shiver
and then he was there beside her in warm sliding
and she took a breath of salt and time
that was almost like drowning.

The moon came from behind doubt to sing,
and lit the forest pewter as she turned into his gaze,
and all the forest watched, eyes open, amazed,
as he wrapped her in his soft enfold  
and flew away with her love wrapped in his wings.
================================

yes...amazed is the perfect word....one that comes to mind so often when reading your images and expressions....
this is one of those times.
stunning story telling Martie.

When your own emptiness is all thats getting through
There comes a point when youre not sure why youre still talking...
I passed that point long ago

Logan
Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641
Arkansas
15 posted 2002-05-12 04:04 PM


What a very lovely poem, Martie, very gentle smile. Could not have been better...
Cirrus
Member
since 2002-05-12
Posts 55

16 posted 2002-05-13 04:46 AM


and then he was there beside her in warm sliding
and she took a breath of salt and time
that was almost like drowning.


Wow Martie, these 3 lines are my favourite, love the imagery.


bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

17 posted 2002-05-13 09:10 PM


Yr words continue to grow in my mind long after I've read 'em. Then I get new flowers from  you.

She said burn ... together.
-TON

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
18 posted 2002-05-13 09:15 PM


The moon came from behind doubt to sing,
and lit the forest pewter as she turned into his gaze,
and all the forest watched, eyes open, amazed,
as he wrapped her in his soft enfold  
and flew away with her love wrapped in his wings.

Amazing, Martie...

~loads of hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

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