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| Open Poetry #20 |
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You |
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DawnG 
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States 
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*This is a spin off of another poem I posted yesterday. I kind of played with it, and came out liking this one better, hope you all do also. Thanks for reading me.* You I thought of you yesterday, as I walked along the sand, I thought of you today, and a smile came to my face, I'll think of you tomorrow, and hope your dreams come true. I thought of you yesterday, and wondered where you were, I thought of you today, and a cheer came to my heart, I'll think of you tomorrow, and know that you'll be there. I thought of you yesterday, and a peacefulness surrounded me, I thought of you today, and my insecurities seemed to fade away, I'll think of you tomorrow, and exhibit a smile pleasantly. I thought of you yesterday, as I slipped off to dreamland, I thought of you today, and my dreams seemed closer to reality, I'll think of you tomorrow, and be thankful you are in my life. I thought of you yesterday, as I dreamed of my today, I thought of you today, and hoped that you thought of me too, I'll think of you tomorrow, with love in my heart. |
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| © Copyright 2002 Dawn - All Rights Reserved | |||
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
I hope your thoughts reach whom they were meant for. They are lovely~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Dawn, I saw the other poem last night, and had to close down early due to storms in the area... I must say, I like this revised version a lot! You lent more simplicity to this one, and it carries more weight...thanks! |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
"I thought of you yesterday, as I dreamed of my today, I thought of you today, and hoped that you thought of me too, I'll think of you tomorrow, with love in my heart."   (big hugggssssssss) Oh my gosh, I love both versions so much but I absolutely love this one because of the transition in past, presemt, and future tense, which shows a true love lasting forever, sweet friend, I LOVE IT!!! (kiss on cheek) YAY!!! I wish for this true happiness to always fill you and that you have, you do, and will always be loved forever, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Dawn, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
This is such a lovely poem Dawn. I wish you would post more often. |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Nice. She said burn ... together. |
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DawnG
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
I'd love to thank you all for your wonderful replies. I wish I could write more often, but when I get really busy it is hard to write. I'm just learning how to work on a poem slowly instead of writing only when an entire poem comes to me at once. Dawn |
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DestinysCharm Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 90 |
Dawn, This poem is so beautiful, it touches on love gracefully, whether it be a significant other, or just a friend. Great work, and thanks for sharing your talent here with us. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
It is amazing how much time we can spend thinking about someone we care for...hopefully the feelings are mutual and good things will happen...James |
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