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Open Poetry #20
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Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2002-05-02 10:50 AM


Part of the notebook series~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How I wish for
rain again

bringing your touch back
to my memory

a trickle
a down pour
drops

I never knew
how lonely
felt

until parted lips

spoke of bending
rainbows to fit
what ever decision
we had placed

before time

pressing my thoughts
to your mind

with yellow roses
soft,
sweet
symbols
completing

how

laughing
in your tides,
with brilliance, &
beauty
you captured me

a photograph,
canvas
black and white
floating  in color
with emeralds

I linger
there

love that was felt
tapping
windows

of your
unforgettable
smile

when 'we'
was feeling
one

peace

how you held my
tears when  I cried

close to heart

for all the beautiful
feelings

when

you whispered

the ocean
will never look the same in our
eyes




~Sinking fast into
an ocean of you,
what if I told you,
what if I said
that I love you
do we dare cross
that line between your
heart and mine~

[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (05-02-2002 10:52 AM).]

© Copyright 2002 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved
Opeth
Senior Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 1543
The Ravines
1 posted 2002-05-02 11:00 AM


Simply beautiful.  To pick a favorite line was difficult, but it would have to be this one...

"when 'we'
was feeling
one"


Lauren, you must live near the ocean, as the sea is supposed to be an excellent source for inspiration.

Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
2 posted 2002-05-02 11:01 AM


GreenEyes~
My god, Lauren ... this is beautiful~
Your words tap gently at the window my heart~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
         noles1@totcon.com                    

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
3 posted 2002-05-02 11:05 AM


Lauren,
A lovely beautiful write in fact a delight.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2002-05-02 11:37 AM


I never knew
how lonely
felt

until parted lips

spoke of bending
rainbows to fit
what ever decision
we had placed

before time

pressing my thoughts
to your mind
===========================


I know that notebook...its full of mirrors and words that play my heart strings.
This is yet another whisper of exquisite from its soul's pages...written on butterlfy wings.
  

... and I don't know why ...
Why should love come down and just sweep me away
I want to fly ... but there are so many things in my way.

J Browne

Raz
Member
since 2002-04-30
Posts 51
Quebec, Canada
5 posted 2002-05-02 11:49 AM


It's raining here now, and the theme is one I can very easily relate to.

Thanks.

-Raz

ctowen
Member Elite
since 2001-10-18
Posts 2286
Green Mountains of VT
6 posted 2002-05-02 12:05 PM


Steady rain .... steady.  
Krissy
Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556
kent England
7 posted 2002-05-02 12:12 PM


Lauren this is awesome, writing at its utter best, you really are an exceptional writer and this is gorgeous


Love and warm stuff
As always
Krissy

And while thy willing soul transpiers
at every pore with instant fires
Andrew Marvell 1621-1678

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

8 posted 2002-05-02 01:21 PM


You know my philosophy: the more rain poems the better. This poem is proof that philosophy is sound.
rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
9 posted 2002-05-02 01:59 PM


Lauren,

   Once again, sooooooo pretty We are so lucky to be able to read you Thank you for sharing your talent and words with us.

Hugs,
Tara

"My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read"
     - Motley Crue, Home Sweet Home

Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
10 posted 2002-05-02 02:06 PM


Lauren,
I love reading over your shoulder in your notebook. Such imagery and emotion connected to nature are a sure guarantee to melt my heart. Just lovely.

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
11 posted 2002-05-02 04:10 PM


"how you held my
tears when  I cried

close to heart

for all the beautiful
feelings

when

you whispered

the ocean
will never look the same in our
eyes"




(smiles) Awwwwwww, I love this, sweet friend, your gorgeous words always bring a smile to my face, this had me dreaming of meeting my Joanna so much and just imagining how much more beautifully I will see things when her heart is beating against mine, cry ing in joy! (kiss on cheek) This is absolutely breathtaking, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lauren, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
12 posted 2002-05-02 04:16 PM


I have this idea for your first book Lauren. . . just like this. . . the "notebook" series. . . printed on notebook paper. . . in a binder. . . or something like that. . .

the simplicity of it would betray the complexity of your words. . . which are excellent. . .

----------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
13 posted 2002-05-02 06:32 PM


Lauren~

this is so beautiful...i get so wrapped up
into your words...they are always a sigh
just waiting to happen...beautiful imagery
captured in this...wonderful!
take care.
amy

"you can't stop
the rain
from pouring down
can't stop the
world from turning 'round
can't stop me from
loving you
no matter
what you do"

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2002-05-02 06:51 PM


Just beautiful!
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
15 posted 2002-05-02 07:04 PM


  
                            
       ...Exquisite...                          

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
16 posted 2002-05-02 09:33 PM


When We was feeling one....love this verse..

Loved all of this..very nice Lauren.

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

17 posted 2002-05-02 10:11 PM


Lauren your words tap upon my soul so softly.  Hugs to you sweet lady.

Like a red brick,
in a white wall
somebodies brush
forgot to paint...
lonely....(as sung by Tracy Lawrence..)


Ivy Rose
Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300
MA, USA
18 posted 2002-05-02 11:23 PM


Very beautiful, chock full of imagery. Just love the way you dangle your words before our eyes.   ***Ivy Rose
KimW
Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 268
Medford, Oregon, USA
19 posted 2002-05-02 11:53 PM


Lovely is not adequate enough - I am in awe. Beautiful writing & expression...

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
20 posted 2002-05-03 12:55 PM


Opeth~

I live 8 blocks from the Ocean, and yes it has remained a constant art of inspiration...

~~

Marge~

as do yours.... thank you for this  gentle reply...hugsss

~~

SY~

I am so glad you did enjoy....a delight to see your smile....

~~

Janet Marie~

traced with butterfly smiles, very touching you are...thank you for always being you.... hugsss

~~

Raz~

I am so glad you could relate to this....I hope the rain was refreshing....

~~

Craig~

awww don't shead a nother tear....I like to see you smile....its an addiction ya know....hugssss to you....

~~

Krissy~

dear one, thank you for stopping by....what a pleasure to see you...

~~

bsquirrel~

I could never get enough of rain, let it pour!!

~~

Tara~

thank you for reading sweet friend...I am so humbled by your tender replies....always...BIG HUGSSSSS

~~

Larry~

well its just a little glimpse....I have many to go through....be well you...peace....hugssss

~~

Noah~

I just adore you....you make writing so worth it dear one...thank you Noah...always...and I hope when you meet joanna in person, you both can spend time on the shores of the sea....and gaze at all its wonderful mystery....

~~

Sven~

Well in truth, I have thought about it, more then once...I think i might enjoy my words on paper....who knows maybe one day....ty!

~~

Amister~

what a sweet compliment, thank you for peeking in....appreciate that smile...HUGSSS

~~

Martie~

thanks~ HUGSSS

~~

Nancy~

I love that reply....thank you sweet lady...HUGSSS

~~

Barry~

I appreciate you....thank you for your kind words....hugsss

~~

Donna~

miss you and your words....

~~

IvyRose~

I do appreciate you stopping in , thank you ever so much for the dangle....( i love that word)

~~

KimW~

lovely is just great....awe makes me smile, as do your words....ty....


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Love, Peace to all.....

Lauren~

I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings
Could I have been anyone other than me
True poems rest between the words
Just give hope a chance to float up

Melodie Morningstarr
Junior Member
since 2002-05-09
Posts 16
Toronto, ON, Canada
21 posted 2002-05-09 10:20 PM



This is beautiful, so touching, so softly powerful.  I've been there and you speakof it so well!

NapalmsConstantlyConfused
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 529

22 posted 2002-05-09 11:49 PM


this is really beautiful.
-dave

Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

23 posted 2002-05-10 12:07 PM


This is so beautifully done lauren..tender and sweet...loved it! hugs

             ~Victoria

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
24 posted 2002-05-10 12:21 PM


This is such a pretty poem, Lauren...

a photograph,
canvas
black and white
floating  in color
with emeralds

I really love it
~lots of hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
25 posted 2002-05-10 12:35 PM


a lovely feeling is embodied in this one

there are some excellent phrases and images

it's like a gentle caress being stolen away almost before it can happen, leaving only longing in its wake

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Rick
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903
Victoria, Australia
26 posted 2002-05-11 08:36 AM


Dear Greeneyes, I am sorry to say that this is the first time that I have read one of your postings, I enjoyed this work of yours so much, filled with expression and feeling, thoughts of remembered tenderness, of loneliness, of togetherness, peace and love; let the rain bring us all memories without the regrets.

Enjoyed the read.

Sincerely Rick

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
27 posted 2002-05-11 08:39 AM



This was a very gentle tap, Lauren...I continue to enjoy the growth I see in your writing as the days go by...

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
28 posted 2002-05-11 08:46 AM


Thank you all very much....I continue to be humbled by each reply.....


with warm regard....


Lauren~

I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings
Could I have been anyone other than me?
True poems rest between the words

Auguste
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Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
29 posted 2002-05-11 12:42 PM


I suppose I'm drawn to your poetry because it's always a blend of romance and nature.  You blend them effortlessly, Lauren. *hugs* my friend.

Michael

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