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Open Poetry #20
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Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia

0 posted 2002-04-30 05:19 PM



Miranda – The Tempest

Drawn on by passion’s voice,
such beauty through the pain.
Too late they see danger,
too late they try in vain.
Rocks move swiftly closer,
timbers groan as they rent,
masts snap and sails are torn.
Lower the mighty went.
Waves crash across the bow
dragging the galleon deep,
finally settling on
the floor of Neptune’s keep.
Miranda of the cliffs,
Siren of the wild sea,
your song calls poor sailors
unto their death and thee.


30th April 2002

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

© Copyright 2002 Dee Manders - All Rights Reserved
Interloper
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
1 posted 2002-04-30 05:26 PM


Well written about the siren's song
Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
2 posted 2002-04-30 06:09 PM


Thank you sir for your kind reply

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2002-04-30 07:49 PM


Rocks move swiftly closer,
timbers groan as they rent,
masts snap and sails are torn.
Lower the mighty went.
Waves crash across the bow
dragging the galleon deep,
finally settling on
the floor of Neptune's keep.
=============================

WAAAAAY COOL girlie...
this is a cadence kissed treat to read aloud...and your imagery and theme are splendidly done...a very cool story to be inspired from...and hey-- its so good to get to read you for a change our sweet Archives queen

... and I don't know why ...
Why should love come down and just sweep me away
I want to fly ... but there are so many things in my way.

J Browne

Magnus
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Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
4 posted 2002-04-30 07:52 PM


The magic and mystery of the sea and the
siren who calls men to shore....Nicely done
Dee, enjoyed this...

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
5 posted 2002-04-30 07:58 PM


Rocks move swiftly closer,
timbers groan as they rent,
masts snap and sails are torn.
Lower the mighty went.

I really liked that verse!!!

Lots of turbulance in this as well as the strength to weather the storm.  

Hold on Dee!!


Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
6 posted 2002-04-30 08:47 PM




WOW!!! This is soooooo powerfully captivating, sweet friend, your words shine with the pure originality and grace of Greek mythology, I could envision the sirens and Odysseus and his men trying to survive in this poem! (big hugggssssss) This is absolutely wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Dee, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
7 posted 2002-05-01 04:08 AM


Janet, after this one I think I have the confidence to write a couple of duets I comitted myself to

Magnus, glad you enjoyed my detour from my usual style.

Lori, the storm is raging but I am hanging in there Glad you enjoyed this.

Noah, the sea has always drawn me, as has mythology so I couldn't think of a better theme.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
8 posted 2002-05-01 08:21 AM


Awesome write here Dee, I look forward to seeing more from you soon!
Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
9 posted 2002-05-01 06:12 PM


Thanks Eddie, I am looking forward to that too.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
10 posted 2002-05-01 06:32 PM


Dee~
This is simply LOVELY~
What a leap forward in your writing~
Keep with it gal ... we miss you when you aren't here~

*hugs* and *well-wishes* on your move~
Give Bec a BIG HUG for me !!!
Love ya'
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
         noles1@totcon.com                    

Raz
Member
since 2002-04-30
Posts 51
Quebec, Canada
11 posted 2002-05-01 06:54 PM


...I would not wish
Any companion in the world but you;
Nor can imagine form a shape,
Besides yourself, to like of.

-The Tempest, Act 3, Scene 1

One of my favourite plays.

-Raz

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
12 posted 2002-05-01 07:01 PM


Marge, this one has really come out of nowhere I was pretty proud of it.
I'm sure moving on will be fine, eventually. And I am seeing Bec today so she'll get that hug

Raz, my inspiration came from a John Waterhouse painting. With this http://www.allposters.com/gallery.asp?aid=713527&item=272882  and a bit of poetic licence I came up with the poem. Thanks for your comments  

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

[This message has been edited by Dee (05-01-2002 07:04 PM).]

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
13 posted 2002-05-01 07:53 PM


Dee...and you should be proud. You did an excellent job here creating this from a painting


Miranda sounds like my ex-wife! At least she had a voice like a siren

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
14 posted 2002-05-02 10:39 PM


Thanks 'Deer, glad you like this. The painting I saw was incredible and all this just came out. A first for me

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
15 posted 2002-07-15 12:48 PM


Now this is definitely one of your best.  Your cadence in this piece is PERFECT, the rhyme flows as smooth as mercury, and your imagery allows us to see the poem line by line and frame by frame.  Gawd it is so nice to be able to read and reply to you and not only because I owe you so many, but because pieces like this would be a rare treat from anyone, anytime.  Stand up and accept your applause sweet poetess as this one gets a standing ovation straight from the heart.  Oh, and yes into my library and thank you for pointing me to it to save me on my search.  ~Cowboy smiling with lovely thoughts of his archive queen as she blossoms to new heights in his hearts eye.~
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
16 posted 2002-07-15 12:50 PM


See, you got me so excited I forgot to click on the library button. LOL Hugs sweet one.
Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
17 posted 2002-07-16 09:41 PM


For some strange reason this computer won't let me see your reply Mark I guess you can't be too fussy with internet cafe comps. I'm sure Bec or Eddie will be happy to email it to me.
Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
18 posted 2002-07-18 10:25 PM


Now I can see your reply, Mark. Thanks for looking at this. I was pretty proud of it, but just wanted your opinion.
Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

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