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Open Poetry #20
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JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

0 posted 2002-04-23 05:37 AM


Visitation of Regrets

How many years does it really
take to get over a divorce?
The acceptance of the separation.
The breaking of the eternal bond.
The memories forever branded
into the minds of a past failure
which can never be reclassified
from bad to good.
The visitation of regrets reminding
me how many lives were affected by
my inability to give and receive love.
More than ten years have gone by
and on occasion I am still faced with
the prospect that the disappointments
will never properly go away.
I can only speak for myself today.
In my defense I have no words to say.
Well at least it doesn't hurt any more.
Does it?

JamesLee
April23
2002

© Copyright 2002 JamesMichael - All Rights Reserved
Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
1 posted 2002-04-23 08:19 AM


hurts til it heals
done a couple
and are friends now

well are friendly anyway

tough stuff guy..but well done

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
2 posted 2002-04-23 04:53 PM




(big hugggssssss) Oh James, my heart goes out to you, I know how hard it must feel to get over such a heartache like this but I know now that you will share true happiness with your dream woman forever and the joy you share with her will always overshadow the sorrow of the divorce! (sigh) This is wonderfully compassionate, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet James, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
3 posted 2002-04-23 04:57 PM


James,
Don't know the answer, but then again everyone is differant, enjoyed.

J. K. Mitchell
Member
since 2002-01-12
Posts 311
GA
4 posted 2002-04-23 05:24 PM


It might always hurt but you've got to learn from your mistakes so as not to repeat them.

Touching piece...

"The only love there is, is the love we make."--Prince

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
5 posted 2002-04-23 05:40 PM


JamesMichael~
Tenderly touching write~

'The visitation of regrets reminding
me how many lives were affected by
my inability to give and receive love.'


So profoundly stated, my friend~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
         noles1@totcon.com                    

Ariana
Senior Member
since 2000-10-08
Posts 571
Orlando, Florida
6 posted 2002-04-23 05:59 PM


James
Until your heart is filled with love again, the hurt will come back again and again.  You have a good heart and it will be happy again.  

Pearls_Of_Wisdom
Member
since 2000-09-02
Posts 175

7 posted 2002-04-23 06:27 PM


James,

Thanks for sharing such a personal piece.  That takes courage.  I enjoyed it for the most part, and I like the honesty and taking responsibility theme.  I do have some suggestions for possible improvement...

Some parts seemed awkward to me, like:

The memories forever branded
into the minds of a past failure
which can never be reclassified
from bad to good.

I like what you're trying to do here, but this is quite a long sentence.  Also, the way you've set it up, the subject of the second line seems to be the mind of the past (and I'm not sure what you mean by that), when I think you mean the mind of the speaker.
The next two lines sound very scientific, which doesn't seem fitting for your subject matter, IMHO.

My main suggestion is making this a little less prosey.  I realize it's tough for a semi-confessional poem like this.  I think also, since you have it set up to be in grammatically correct sentences, it's extra difficult.  But I think that would lend a lot of power to this.  Get less rational and more emotional.  We want to feel what you feel, not just hear logically what your thought process was.  Through your words, I can see the pain that wants to come out, but I can't feel it fully yet.

Hope that helps give you some ideas.  Let me know what you think,

Ashley

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

8 posted 2002-04-23 07:41 PM


Loved the ending. the "Does it?" emphasizes the angst and uncertainty of the piece. Well done, James.
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

9 posted 2002-04-23 10:04 PM


Like DS said, it hurts...til it heals.
I think there is more to be written...until it quits hurting.  Nicely written felt words.

Like a red brick,
in a white wall
somebodies brush
forgot to paint...
lonely....(as sung by Tracy Lawrence..)


Joyce Johnson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912
Washington State
10 posted 2002-04-23 10:15 PM


Your words show that divorce is not an easy way out. I lost my love to death and thought it was the ultimate.  But who knows. In some cases divorce may just be harder.  Joyce
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2002-04-23 10:18 PM


The hurt eventually goes....
then when you remember...
it's a touch of sadness you feel.
But, it does get better...
and now that you have a new love
she should be of great
comfort and happiness to you.
~Big Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

12 posted 2002-04-24 01:36 AM


Well at least it doesn't hurt any more.
Does it?


A very touching write PoetFriend and I thank you4sharing it...
HugsNsmiles2Ualways...
*~coco~*

Magnus
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Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
13 posted 2002-04-24 08:36 PM


JM....I can tell from these words that this
is your own experience and feelings....

Does it?.....No,  I don't think it does...

I still remember....and sometimes it still
hurts...

Beautifully penned my friend...

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
14 posted 2002-04-25 12:16 PM


Does it?

Yes, it does... Not constantly, not even often... but sometimes... even after almost 20 years, even though I count him among my dearest of friends.

Anyone entering marriage expecting to fail shouldn't be entering. The rest of us think it couldn't happen to us... and then have hopes and dreams and anticipation replaced with the bitter gall of failure. Those regrets fade... but they don't disappear.

You've written a painful subject well, JM. *S*


Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

15 posted 2002-04-25 06:49 PM


I guess its best not to think of the past james..as it can be a waste of time..hope you are planning a happy future..hugs

              ~Victoria

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
16 posted 2002-04-25 07:21 PM


Well James my man, I don't really want to mess up your mind, but I was divorced way back around '69-70 and some 30-plus years, and a very successful and satisfying marriage of almost 28 years, later, I STILL feel the emotional turmoil.  

I don't think one can truly love and just chunk that love out the door.  I think (I know!) it stays with one all ones' life. I don't believe one really falls "out of love" if one truly loved. One may not be able to live with another anymore, for various reasons, but if one truly loved, unless something just god-awful was done to one, such love just does not fade away.

It's particularly hard on one like me, or you, that never wanted the divorce.  There's never closure.  Anyway, yes, I still feel I love her and miss her (but then, I miss a lot of
women and they never even married me!!! Hee, hee).  So, how long...you plan on dying when???

Just need to get on with living, my man...there's a lot of life and love just waiting
for anyone who wants it.  You can dream, and think and wish, but you can't live in the past...today and tomorrow are what we are given, and we have to live in that world.

You never forget, or stop wanting, loving, desiring, needing your past, and I don't think you should.  It just has to be put where it belongs and remember for all that it provided as long as it did.

Walk easy...James,

jwesley

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

17 posted 2002-04-26 12:11 PM


bumpity bump James
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
18 posted 2002-04-28 06:27 AM


Thank you so much dark stranger, Noah, Seymour, J.K., Marge, Ariana, Pearls of Wisdom, serenity, Gentle spirit, Joyce, Enchantress, Coco, Magnus, Suthern, Victoria and jwesley for the nice words of support and wisdom...
I was suprised that it still bothers me over ten years later...not all the time but sometime.  When regret visits you it is very real.  But it is different then the pain you first feel following a divorce.  My regrets are from my inability to love and be loved...I thought I really loved my wife....but if I did why didn't I treat her better.   Why weren't my actions reflective of that love?  And then I have the regrets of putting my sons through this...these thoughts will visit me for the rest of my life...James

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