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Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

0 posted 2002-04-09 03:06 PM

It rained yesterday
A slow dripping wet
You couldn’t avoid

I watched from the window
As drops made long slow streaks
On panes edged with fog
Wondering if you too
Were aware of how we
Like the spring shower
Were grey

I looked for rainbows
To splash color across
Eyes of hope
Not willingly embracing the
Cold shadow hues
That line the clouds we are

But…
Held in the overcast and wind
A darker reality of storms
Pervaded leaving no room
For reflections on brighter days

When last night
I felt for you,
Found a leg to drape mine over,
That allowed my touch
For enough time to avoid being obvious
Before pulling away

This morning
The rain was gone
Its moisture replaced with a shower
And you not quite hiding the fact
You did not want me to see you naked
When I brought the morning cup of coffee

And knew I was the raindrop
Disappearing in long streaks
On the pains slightly fogged
Wondering when I
Would evaporate

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2002-04-09 03:10 PM

but before the
evaporation

the sun put me to
one more bit
of good use

and when it came
out
passed rays through
that tear left of me
there
on your window pane

I gave you
one more
rainbow

before I dried up
and was collected
by the rays.

[This message has been edited by Sunshine (04-09-2002 03:10 PM).]

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2002-04-09 03:24 PM

Ron

It's hard to beat Sunshine's reply to your rainy day, except to say your poem shows the hurt in you even through the fogged up window. Hugs!

SmittenKitten
Senior Member

since 2001-06-20

Posts 1131
where the sky and horizon meet

3 posted 2002-04-09 03:32 PM

Ron~ Your poem struck a chord in me...your words are enough to induce tears. "wondering when I would evaporate"....

Beautifully and so painfully expressed.

hugs,
~Krista

Your beautiful words & creativity allow me to connect with the same in myself.
Thank you for having the courage to share yourself so that I can too

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

4 posted 2002-04-09 03:52 PM

this touches deeply and so sadly....
truly hope this is not a reality for you, but know it is for many....

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

5 posted 2002-04-09 04:10 PM

A super write my friend!
My eyes effortlessly flowed down the page

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

6 posted 2002-04-09 04:20 PM

When last night
I felt for you,
Found a leg to drape mine over,
That allowed my touch
For enough time to avoid being obvious
Before pulling away
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh the ache and longing in this piece!!
My gosh Ron!
Will someone please give me a hug?

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

7 posted 2002-04-09 04:56 PM

When last night
I felt for you,
Found a leg to drape mine over,
That allowed my touch
For enough time to avoid being obvious
Before pulling away

This morning
The rain was gone
Its moisture replaced with a shower
And you not quite hiding the fact
You did not want me to see you naked
When I brought the morning cup of coffee

And knew I was the raindrop
Disappearing in long streaks
On the pains slightly fogged
Wondering when I
Would evaporate
==============================

hey Capt...good to see you here...have missed your words of impact..
and this one........this one cuts like a knife....
as I poet I want to commend you on the theme and imagery and the way you worked this metaphor to poetic perfection...but its like complimenting someone on a bleeding wound.
Needless to say...your wrote it till I feel it...sometimes sleeping alone is the same as not.

Zinsser
Senior Member

since 2001-02-27

Posts 1641
Calif.

8 posted 2002-04-09 05:20 PM

wonderfull write.... so very sad
Connie

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

9 posted 2002-04-09 07:26 PM

"And knew I was the raindrop
Disappearing in long streaks
On the pains slightly fogged
Wondering when I
Would evaporate

(big hugggssssss) Such sadness fills your words, sweet friend, I hope everything is OK and now the rainbow reflects your tears with warmth of loves presence! (sigh) This is very powerful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

jellybeans
Member Elite

since 2000-10-13

Posts 2298

10 posted 2002-04-10 02:41 PM

i have started saving your poems to disk, these are too powerful to let them slide off into another archived forum....wonderful write

LngJhnAg
Member Elite

since 1999-07-23

Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

11 posted 2002-04-10 02:48 PM

CPat - this is excellent - I can feel the words still.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

12 posted 2002-04-10 03:06 PM

a big sigh of feeling here...
and a hug to you C
M

wayoutwalt
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)

13 posted 2002-04-10 03:08 PM

worth
the read - thanks

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

14 posted 2002-04-10 03:53 PM

love fades soometimes...it's sad

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

15 posted 2002-04-11 12:12 PM

Beautifully written, Cpat... with flawless metaphor. This leaves an incredible sadness... a new day drying up all remaining hope.

I like it very much... as well as Sunshine's response. *S*

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