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Open Poetry #25

Traveling The Words

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2003-04-08 04:59 AM

Traveling The Words

if you
write of me
and of you
write us
a happy
ever after
and leave out
the words
like rules
just write of
how you will
hold my hand
as we
jump over
the cracks
and every road
that is
traveled leads
to us

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

1 posted 2003-04-08 07:18 AM

writing happy endings is not always so easy... I have tried myself and seem always to get hung up on something..

hope yours do end up happy...

nicely done...

bslicker

Member Elite

since 2000-12-04

Posts 2321
state of mind

2 posted 2003-04-08 12:43 PM

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

3 posted 2003-04-08 12:49 PM

enjoy your read

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

4 posted 2003-04-08 02:19 PM

nicely done!

S Arthur Grey
Senior Member

since 2001-03-19

Posts 719
woven by a poet's loom

5 posted 2003-04-09 03:58 PM

1s_l,

I'm fascinated by this . . .
Such an interesting perspective, "traveling the words".
And it is true, the words do describe the journey, and even prescribe it, or for that matter, proscribe it, as you suggest.
Your wisdom is showing.

S A G

jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

6 posted 2003-04-09 08:35 PM

if you write of me
and I of you
does that make us friends?
If we leave out the words,
like rules,
and jump over the cracks,
will we be friends. . . evermore?
If i fall down along the way
and skin my knee,
seemingly forget the words I wrote,
will you still write of me?
Will you wipe the tears away,
forget the words, like rules,
so when I write of thee,
you'll still write of me?
Or must I write of you,
and you of me, secretly,
because the words of the rule,
took priority?

Yep...never could just tell you I like what you write, could I...sorry I took so much liberty with your wonderful piece, but I had fun anyway...

jimmy

[This message has been edited by jwesley (04-09-2003 08:37 PM).]

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