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Open Poetry #25
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Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2003-04-04 08:38 PM



Welcome, Spring….

This is the month of foolish weather,
hiding seek of warm,
young leaves curled slightly,
holding what sunlight blessed
them in their early unfold of this day,
while turtle-necked, I went into the quiet
of this hour, early dusk, not twilight,
that in-between moment of calm wind ~
so calm I had to move the chimes
with a brush of hand
just to hear earlier sounds of day in swing…

and at that brush of touch, a cardinal called,
Welcome Home…

~*~

small chills have returned to us, no ice, yet…
just breath of Winter left from the west,
blown this way by a stroke of wing
from butterflies beating
early Spring sway from my old West coast…

a place of remember…

~*~

at this age, hers [then] being mine [now],
we learned to become friends.
as I had thought, for children do,
that the name child in her eyes would always be
my spot of her love…but she came quietly, saying
we can be friends now, gasping me, quieting me,
although I walked towards that nuance
with a measured, tethered step, it was a small crown
of mature now,
though I could not call someone Mother
that she would now be one to whom I might tell
all secrets…

~*~

but there were moments…fine moments…
in a place where seasons never change,
like that one night,
visiting in the Short Time,
where my old room was now her room
this, being some decade of time later from
the pronouncement of friends
when he was gone and she could no longer
dream together those steps of tomorrow
without him, so she sheeted her bed
and quilted her nights
in the old room of her daughters…

I spent that time with her, massaging
her legs, for they were growing cramped
with medication, and chemo,
re-learning that smooth of an aging woman
is not the taut of a spring chick,
or even that of a gloating caper…

and I remember…

someday I hope my legs are this soft…
and lovely…

for she had Steinway piano legs, thin and curvy,
though as women do,
she never thought they were good enough…
but they were,
for father would watch her move a room
loving her more
that she never knew of her true hold
on his heart.

~*~

Tonight, in removing black turtled neck,  
then other sundry clothing, I thought of her,
the coming Spring, Springs of my past…
fast-forwarding into Summers now gone
yet still to live through,
now knowing why Fall feels so comfortable,
how existential Winters have not yet settled
into my soul…

I then touched my skin, in evoke,
and heard her voice, again

we can be friends now.


© Copyright 2003 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
1 posted 2003-04-04 10:00 PM


amazing. submitt it to the next "chicken soup for the soul" collection. they would be fools not to snatch this up.

i love the sense of humor it has.
the transition from white to black turtleneck was subtle but effective.
you might consider not abandoning the nature motif so completely, especially since "welcome, spring..." is the title, but only if it won't hurt the feel of it.

just great!

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2003-04-04 10:04 PM


ah majnu...not so subtle...it's "while" not "white"...

and the spring was transitional in the feelings I felt while outside...doing more than I had left here....

perhaps if I inserted that, it would be better in it's read?  If you think it is lacking something, let me know...

and I will consider all possibilities of a re-write, including cutting out what is not necessary....

I ramble, you know...

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
3 posted 2003-04-04 10:47 PM


Karilea,
you know how I love your poetry, and this
is certainly no exception.
I could feel your heart and emotion in this. It was like
I could see and feel the friendship between the older
and younger woman than had gotten stronger over the years.

Thank you for sharing this with us.

Heart Hugs,
Ethel

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
4 posted 2003-04-04 11:05 PM


she never thought they were good enough…
but they were,
for father would watch her move a room
loving her more
that she never knew of her true hold
on his heart.

Oh yes, dear Karilea. How these words do awaken memories. Wonderful sweet friend. thankyou for this, Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers-
that perches in the soul....
                  
                       -Emily Dickinson

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2003-04-04 11:12 PM


Ah Karilea...I again must choose the stanza my sister did, as my favourite.
This is very very special...don't you dare change a word!
Wonderful imagery and use of colour.
Just an amazing write!
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
6 posted 2003-04-05 07:24 AM


Oh, Sister Sun, this is so very lovely...it touched me deeply, and I say this as I wipe a tear...

Accept these small gifts from my gypsy heart  ~~S~~

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
7 posted 2003-04-05 10:15 AM


enjoyed
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
8 posted 2003-04-05 11:10 AM


Muchly enjoyed this one, Karilea... particularly the way you have lead the reader through your gentle subtle ways...

Regards,
Sudhir

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2003-04-05 11:18 AM


small chills have returned to us, no ice, yet…
just breath of Winter left from the west,
blown this way by a stroke of wing
from butterflies beating
early Spring sway from my old West coast


a place of remember…

~*~

at this age, hers [then] being mine [now],
we learned to become friends.
as I had thought, for children do,
that the name child in her eyes would always be
my spot of her love…but she came quietly, saying
we can be friends now, gasping me, quieting me,
although I walked towards that nuance
with a measured, tethered step, it was a small crown
of mature now,

though I could not call someone Mother
that she would now be one to whom I might tell
all secrets…

~*~

but there were moments…fine moments…
in a place where seasons never change,

like that one night,
visiting in the Short Time,
where my old room was now her room
this, being some decade of time later from
the pronouncement of friends…
when he was gone and she could no longer
dream together those steps of tomorrow
without him, so she sheeted her bed
and quilted her nights
in the old room of her daughters…

=====================================


but there were moments…fine moments…
in a place where seasons never change,



Tis called butterfly season
and ... YKTIKTYKIK.

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
10 posted 2003-04-07 07:07 PM


Karilea...and you complain to me about kleenex warnings!  This is such a lovely feeling poem of love and rememberance!  I know about that soft skin.  
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

11 posted 2003-04-08 12:28 PM


Healing and renewal, acceptance and grace to go forward, while cherishing the past knowing mistakes are part of our humanity...

the lotion on the legs...the touch...spoke volumes to me. I thought of the cycle, how many of us, start our lives, with lotion lovingly applied to legs and, blush, bottoms, and the where the cycle brings us to...I ramble, but somehow I think you KNOW what I'm talking about!

(Think I'll go put on some Buddy Holly now! ) and I KNOW, nobody else will understand that, but YOU do...

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
12 posted 2003-04-08 04:52 PM


Dear Karilea this is very moving ... and brought memories back for me too.
Sweet melancholy ... the passing of seasons, but Spring is renewal and even though the past surfaces, it has brought us to this moment, where new sweetness waits to be savoured.
Love, Margherita

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
13 posted 2003-04-08 04:59 PM


Stunningly lovely, Sunshine, you should submit this to the book!

Core

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