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Ratleader
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0 posted 2003-03-30 10:27 AM


Hearts On A String


She had her
tools, oh
she
did,
an easy southern
way and the
angel
face,
a shape that
haunted
men's
eyes
and oh yes a
beautiful
set
of
hearts, all strung
together
on a
string.
She must have
had them all
or so
I
think, mine for
sure and
too
my
best friend, yes
a goner
before
I
knew he'd been
collected,
or
I
might have warned
the hapless
guy
but
it didn't matter.
Like I
said,
she
got them all in
her own sweet
time,
old,
young, in-between,
single, married
guys
the
easiest of course.
And she kept
them
all
up, spinning like
a juggler's
plates
til
she decided it was
time to let
one
fall,
delectibly shattered
into sharp
tiny
bits.
It started young,
seventeen, a
baby
boy,
adopted and seventeen
himself when I
knew
her,
though she of
course never
knew
him.
Before that a
cousin, an
uncle
too,
and at thirty-four
collecting
all
her
hearts on a string,
the sweetest
kind
of
revenge.


[This message has been edited by Ratleader (03-30-2003 11:21 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved
Greeneyes
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In Your Poetic Mind
1 posted 2003-03-30 10:52 AM


Hearts dangling.....I do so love the way you presented this.....I hope it's not a "true" story.....heart hugsssss...
Lauren~

I close my eyes and there in the shadows I see your light
You come to me out of my dreams
Across the night

Ratleader
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2 posted 2003-03-30 10:54 AM


From Austin....had the sweetest accent, and the sweetest....collection....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
3 posted 2003-03-30 11:51 AM


Ratleader - Once I knew of a southern belle's ways, and have never forgotten them. Like the way you presented this...

BC

Ratleader
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4 posted 2003-03-30 11:53 AM


Nor have I, Bill, nor have I.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling
5 posted 2003-03-30 12:15 PM


Love the way you wrote this, your words presented just like hearts on a string.
Jason

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
6 posted 2003-03-30 12:33 PM


RatLeader~
I found this fascinating~
Just kept stringing me along~

Great word-imagery, poet~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com                        

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
7 posted 2003-03-30 12:40 PM


I think on this one, I shall just leave my signature as a reply if you don't mind.

If time were taken from the heart of man then we would have no way to measure the pain of love

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2003-03-30 12:44 PM


cool write!
wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
9 posted 2003-03-30 12:51 PM


Dagnabbit!
The concept of this boggles. (The structure, not the content. lol)
Hard enough to just write something.

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
10 posted 2003-03-30 04:13 PM


Rat - nice job here - sounds like a black widow . . .  the form is amazing - the poem I mean lol  . . .  xxoo
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
11 posted 2003-03-30 04:35 PM


Ed...you have a way of telling stories through your lines. Always much more between the lines than the words themselves contain...nice
SilentFreija
Junior Member
since 2003-03-30
Posts 37

12 posted 2003-03-30 05:17 PM


That was a great poem but I don't think I liked how you only had a couple of words on each line, I just have  a weird thing...but keep up the good work. =]

Where you look for broken hearts...you'll find me...
mend my broken heart and love me
because I forget how to smile.

Nightshade
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just out of reach
13 posted 2003-03-30 06:11 PM


Ratleader - I really enjoyed this and the way it dangled down the page. Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers-
that perches in the soul....
                  
                       -Emily Dickinson

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California
14 posted 2003-03-30 09:12 PM


Ed...I'm glad you survived to become a poet!
garysgirl
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Florida, USA
15 posted 2003-03-30 09:33 PM


Hi Ed....
I love this poem about the
Southern belle with the
angel face.......
and I also like the hearts
dangling down the page, too.  
Hugs,
Ethel

Ratleader
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16 posted 2003-03-30 10:54 PM


Can't talk to everyone individually here, but I want to thank every single person who answered this little admission of my own fallibility.

...and maybe add that of course there's a worse error -- NOT letting your heart be "collected" when you meet that perfect match.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
17 posted 2003-03-30 11:26 PM


"Women,can't live with them..pass the beer nuts" ~ Norm from Cheers
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
18 posted 2003-03-31 04:51 AM


Hearts on a string huh.   Very interesting.
James

KristieSue
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Senior Member
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460
PA, US
19 posted 2003-03-31 08:41 AM


wow...I know someone like that LOL  Very visual and I enjoyed it!

Failure isn't failure if a lesson from it is learned ~ KS

suthern
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Member Seraphic
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Posts 20723
Louisiana
20 posted 2003-04-01 10:33 AM


It works both ways. *S* I have a poem where I was "the brand new star of your collection, one more trophy on your shelf"... but as you said, the greater tragedy is being so concerned with protecting your heart from dangling that you never give it a chance to be embraced. *S*

I like this very much... and the presentation is absolutely perfect! *S*

snoduck
Member
since 2002-11-15
Posts 99
Selah, WA
21 posted 2003-06-19 05:29 PM


I'd like to start off by thanking you for replying to my poem "Queen of Hearts" although your point of view is different it is indeed very similar to my poem. To make a long story short, I'm a 16 year old girl, and my best friend, also 16, is the heart of my poem. I hate watching her destroy innocent boys. Same with your poem. I have watched that girl meet great guys that would treat her with the upmost respect, while I always end up with the jerks that find me no more useful than to get laid. I hope for your sake and mine that people just stop playing games.  Thanks again for the reply, and I will most definitly be looking for more of your work.

-Erica-

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
22 posted 2003-07-26 10:29 AM


just thought I needed to read this one to gain more understanding of the new poem you posted.
Thanks for the link
M

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