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Open Poetry #25
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machiner
Member
since 2003-03-13
Posts 67
MA, US

0 posted 2003-03-20 04:36 PM


this short collection of words is based on actual events one evening in 1995.
It's a poem. It's a love poem.


walking.
the day was fine.
bright & clean smelling, and we were walking.
you reached around my waist and pulled me close so I could smell your hair. it smelled like the day.
off to the left a car horn
and somewhere a child laughed with all the abandon of love.
the day was fine, crisp and free!
I wanted myself back-so I pulled away and let our hands continue our embrace.
you-watching a bird take flight--squeezed my hand---and I--watching clouds retell someone's memory--felt my hand being squeezed.
the day was fine when the car approached...
tires spinning as fast as the steering wheel was gripped hard.
veins bulging
hearts racing
voices shouting
clips loaded...each bullet a life.
packed as tightly as your hand squeezed
when one found your heart.
we were just walking...but now you were falling.
you were no longer next to me when I looked, you were falling.
your eyes were aplolgizing to me for our stolen future.
and now we are stopped on this fine day
tires squealing
tears flowing
sobs choking
death finding the pavement, smacking as you hit...
turning everything black.
your hand won't squeeze back; and I'm falling to die with you but I'm not allowed.
10/31/95


that one still gives me the creeps ( I haven't read it in years, and I'm a bit weepy) the scene actually happened sans the death and drive-by. i was walking with my girlfriend after we watched the news. i fantasized the whole thing...morbid, I know...but that's how I write poetry that smacks you in the face.
I hope someone likes it for what it is.

© Copyright 2003 machiner - All Rights Reserved
j0n4th4n
Member
since 2003-03-11
Posts 94

1 posted 2003-03-20 04:40 PM


hmmm.. im not sure about your methods, but the actual poetry has flair.

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
2 posted 2003-03-20 05:27 PM


It may not have happpened to you, but it happened to someone, somewhere, and it's affecting. I see no reason why a poet has to live every story he tells. He lives it in his mind when he writes it.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2003-03-20 08:26 PM


Gripping! --and a fertile imagination is a writer's best friend!

Peace & Light,
Earth Angel

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
4 posted 2003-03-21 07:07 PM




(big huggggsssssss) My heart goes out to you, dearest friend, I could envision the whole head-on collision reading this and can understand how horrifying it can feel as this had me at the edge of my seat! (sigh) This is powerful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

DawnG
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494
United States
5 posted 2003-03-22 04:01 AM


Very intense poem you have penned here.

                            Dawn

machiner
Member
since 2003-03-13
Posts 67
MA, US
6 posted 2003-03-22 12:39 PM


Thank you for reading my poetry, and offering up yours.


     Parenthood and Finality

if death comes for me
I will not go
incomplete.

if death comes for me
I will not go
incomplete.

God, pay death
trying to steal --
losing, to reel
uncertain.

Yours is my worry,
remaining,
leashed sanguine to
ignorance.
I will fight for you.

SPROUT!
lease and labor
in absence of your
champion.

Death found
completeness
and begged its consideration.

machiner

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
7 posted 2003-03-22 01:02 PM


machiner:  this was too close to home - see this quite a lot here - not morbid - comes from your soul - let it speak . . .

I'm falling to die with you but I'm not allowed

this line amazing xxoo

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
8 posted 2003-03-26 04:00 PM


As others have commented before me... you've exhibited an empathy here, cataloging events that have touched other lives... and done it well. A poet doesn't have to live their every word... an imagination's a good thing! *S*

Welcome to Passions! *S*

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
9 posted 2003-03-26 04:19 PM



Can only echo what Earth Angel and
Suthern have said - a poet's writings
stem mostly [for some of us] from imagination...
others have lived just this...
you pictured it all...

perfectly.

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
10 posted 2003-03-26 09:34 PM


enjoy your read
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
11 posted 2003-03-27 05:01 AM


It's allright if your imagination writes...James
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