navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #25 » Boomer ang (ricta meter)
Open Poetry #25
Post A Reply Post New Topic Boomer ang (ricta meter) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

0 posted 2003-03-19 05:44 PM



Boomer ang

Boomer
ang wheeling her
ky-jerky arounda
bout the field, misses the ima
ginary bird, still near level, then ris
ing, turning back, losing moment
um, falls at my feet. Won
derful flight, boom
erang!

[This message has been edited by Ratleader (03-19-2003 07:42 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

1 posted 2003-03-19 05:48 PM


I liked how you e.e. cummings-ized the rictameter. The only thing is, in rictameter, the first and last line should be the same. It sorta is, and it sorta isn't in this case.

I always appreciate someone willing to hit right against the boundaries of a form and try to break through 'em.

Mike

Stella was a diver and she was always down.
Interpol

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
2 posted 2003-03-19 05:49 PM


Push that envelope!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
3 posted 2003-03-19 11:09 PM


Ed...Would like to see it in action...the boomerang has always facinated me.  Interesting the way you wrote this.  
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
4 posted 2003-03-19 11:15 PM


Yes, Ed, I love the way you did this.

"Love makes the world go around"
~with love and hugs from Ethel__GG~  
                  

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
5 posted 2003-03-20 12:07 PM


Mainly teasing vlraynes, who had reminded me to start with a two syllable word...(apologized first, of course)...but it had started me wondering whether you could break words and live, if you had just the right subject. Once I get an idea in my head, I just have to find something to do with it.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

ljossberir
Member
since 2003-05-04
Posts 81
Ny, USA
6 posted 2003-05-08 11:52 PM


very creative style, Ive never seen anything like it (sort of like William C.Williams) but a heck of alot better.
-matt

SimplyGold
Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453

7 posted 2003-05-26 04:40 PM


Most creative. Enjoyed it and has me wanting to learn more about rictameters.

SG

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #25 » Boomer ang (ricta meter)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary