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Open Poetry #25
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Dying Here
| Open Poetry #25 |
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Dying Here |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought 
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Sure I’ll help And don’t you see? I’m dying here Dying… I’m on the ground And I’m picking you up My body soon will go to the dust And sure I’ll help you This last time Have you noticed? Are you blind? Fighting warriors Cease eventually I love you… Don’t stab me again. ‘Cause I’m dying here Dying… Sure I’m fine. Sick and crying And holding the line. But take my hand And I’ll still show you Just how much love can do. When did you become so callous? Can’t you see I’m dying here? Dying... (err don't worry, I really am fine. Its not entirely about me.) - And so it was that time stood still - |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Alyssa, I think you wrote a similar poem awhile back and parts of it I didn't get and same with this. I like it. The depth of feeling, the determination. Before I knew better (for me) I'd be a crutch and get stabbed, too, for the effort, from those spiritually blind. Sometimes, (for me) being that warrior, and I do understand the ferocity and drive to love someone until they learn to love themselves, meant allowing that person to feel the consequences of their deeds. And that hurts sometimes worse than their stabbing contempt. Let go and let God ultimately was the solution. This may have nothing to do with your poem, but, as I just said in a different poem, my interpretation is sometimes much different than the poets intent. And even if this is not what you meant it is good for me to remember my lessons learned of which this poem reminded me, it is so easy to fall back to old ways. Hugs and love, hope you are doing ok.. Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
strong emotions... and ones I am sure many have felt... nicely captured |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Pat, thanks for the reply. Yea I probably did write a similar before. Habits stick. In the meaning I have for this, its more of a thing where we'll be together no matter what, and I'll help them with what I can... but not being a crutch. So I'll do my part in regards to my relationship with them and won't have less love even if they aren't doing their part. Its nothing where I have the postion to show the tough love needed. You're right though, its good to remember the lessons we've learned... its so easy to find the comfortable paths again. Hugs and love. Cpat, yes, I'm sure I'm not the only one. Which is frightening and comforting at the same time. Thanks for the reply Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
GG- I loved this - been stabbed many times myself - excellent - xxoo lol no apologies about the write - have you read my stuff?? You guys must think I'm nuts . . . [This message has been edited by littlewing (03-12-2003 08:03 PM).] |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
littlewing, thanks! And I happen to love your poetry! I like gutwrnching, heartfelt, and truth. I guess I'm just odd. I don't write though to be good, I write the pain about not smiling so I can actually smile in life. It works, so I'm happy! again, thank youAlways, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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Connel
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736Florida, USA |
 Its a good thing its not really about you! And Im so glad that your okay, and such a wonderful write!  Read ^ there, because you are reading the wrong part! |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Connel, thank you for the 'wonderful write.' And yes good its not completely about me, I'm not dying, just sick lol Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
ugh, the neverending person who gives and gives and gives even when they are at their moment of turning into ashes themselves....and you'd think SOMEONE would notice....but everyone is so busy taking, taking...that they don't see what the person who cares for everyone is feeling...if only everyone cared as much as that one.... *climbing off soapbox* LOL been feeling this way lately....and I feel this poem said it magically (sp?).... |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
LoL Kristie, you seem to understand! Thanks for your reply and really.. I don't care if they notice me giving, though they're expecting it, especially when I'm so sick, is kind of annoying.. I just don't enjoy being stabbed and left to die! I see you really have been thinking about this lately! And hope things are well for you. Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - (blink, breathe, stand, fight) [This message has been edited by GG (03-13-2003 02:36 AM).] |
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KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
LOL I know this feeling all to well. I mean, you can scream out that you're in pain....would rather melt to death in a heated oven then live one more moment with the aches and pains and no relief.... and some people just don't get the hint! so, here's to us LOL They don't know it, but we're reaping our rewards...LOL but a short nap (like two or three yrs?) would be nice LOL |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
lol I'd always thought maybe being run over repeatedly was what would be better.. but the oven example is awful nice too! You're so right. And the nap would be nice too.. but first I'll hope for maybe ten minutes of sleep tonight! lol yes, to us! **klinks a glass of sparkling cider**  thanks for the second reply! And for the understanding. Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I can relate...well...good writing! |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Dixie, you always do... *sigh* ..I wish you didn't have to. Thanks for reading and replying. Always Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
The Bodhisattvas take a vow to forsake Nirvanna untill all have reached enlightenment and suffering has ended. Your words always seem to have this deep feeling of relating to the pain of others(and your own) and sharing in this to help relieve us all (and yourself!). Thank you. Eric |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Eric, thank you for replying. I suppose I don't want others to know the pain I know.. though some know much worse. I however live in peace, freedom, and Truth, that is what I want for others vandana, thank you much, I'm glad you enjoyed. Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
this is real good, u cant smile 24/7 only idiots and dogs do that |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
GG - I read this writing and know the words only to well. Indeed many of us have I believe, nice write... BC |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
inked, those are the kind of idiots ya just wanna slap lol ...reality is life is painful and hard, acknowldging that is necessary. As long as it isn't the sole focus! Thanks for the reply Bill, when I write something sad it always makes me sigh sadly when other people can understand.. I wish you didn't have to! thanks for replying Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
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