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Open Poetry #25
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JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

0 posted 2003-03-04 05:49 PM



Problems.
I've had my share
of that I can positively assure.
Although many of those,
those taints upon my sublime world,
merely reflect me.

Yes, I must confess.
My problems you see
are no more than me being me.
Compulsive, addictive,
stubborn, stern, taciturn.
I could have seen,
the reality of my own demise
if I had not stayed
steeped in booze and staring
through vicitm's eyes.

Regrets, If you only knew.
regret the most that I don't
really have true regrets.
My mistakes are done, no remorse.
My errors in life, past.
Can't touch me now, move on.

Problems?
Yeah, I have them.
the biggest of them all you see
is the problem of me.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

© Copyright 2003 JP Burns - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2003-03-04 06:27 PM


Just BE, JP, that's all anyone can really do, in the end.
I've finally learned it's a waste of time and energy to spend the present and future on the past's regrets. Carpe diem, and be happy for today.

Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling
2 posted 2003-03-04 06:31 PM


I am also my biggest problem, nice write.
Jason

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2003-03-04 06:32 PM


Excellent write JP..
Seems a lot of folks are getting there true feelings aired today!
At least you don't feel like old clothes piled in a corner.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
4 posted 2003-03-04 06:45 PM


More like that ratty towel you've used to clean up the dog's piddle and then threw outside....  

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

SPIRIT
Senior Member
since 2002-12-29
Posts 1745
California Desert
5 posted 2003-03-04 08:26 PM


Bet a lot of us out here can relate, I know I've always been my own biggest problem. Thought provoking write. Thank you.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2003-03-05 04:33 AM


I can relate well
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
7 posted 2003-03-05 10:44 AM




"and staring through victim's eyes"
chilling....no remorse?

Well written.

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
8 posted 2003-03-05 10:58 AM


Yeah, JP. Most people are their own worst enemy, when it comes right down to it. But, I've learned that there's nothing we can do about our past mistakes...except to maybe learn from them...
prof.pishnu
Junior Member
since 2003-03-05
Posts 21

9 posted 2003-03-05 11:07 AM


true everyone has an enemy within them and they are ussually the hardest enemies to overcome. I read the poem by seymour called 'a thought for you' i think and the replies were very well put. Maybe theres advice in that poem for you.
The poem speaks volumes and i believe everyone can relate to it. Good job  and i hope you fnid time today to look within yourself instead of at yourself. You'll find your place

regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
10 posted 2003-03-05 11:24 AM




My previous reply has not come up on my screen to edit and add to it.

I simply want to say I like your honest approach to where you are.

Having many addicts/alcoholics in my life however, I learned of their undeniable remorse and heard the heartbreaking sobs of such, to think they could have done such harm, they can hardly bare. Some joined the AA program and learned how to make amends and whether others forgive them or not, it does wipe the slate clean for them....A way to move past the guilt and shame.  

I am not suggesting you should. I don't know you, if this is indeed you in the poem.

What I did pick up from it was the self-loathing. And nobody should have to live with that. We are all inadequate, selfish and self-centered, and cause harm to others. What we do about it is critical to them and us.

Hugs and love to you, with the warmest regards,  Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
11 posted 2003-03-05 11:28 AM


the biggest of them all you see
is the problem of me.

I have the same problem
M

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
12 posted 2003-03-05 12:21 PM


Thanks for the support guys.  I just wanted to speak to Regards2u, and the rest as well I suppose.

I'm an alcoholic, as many here either know or have surmized.  I have been sober for three years now (March 16th, to be exact), but that does not deter from some of what this poem alludes to.

I have been blessed, or cursed, with peircing self perception and awareness.  In all my days of drinking I have never been to a place where I was not fully aware of what I was doing or why I was doing it.  I've made errors and have always looked upon them as "oh well, what's done is done, let's move on..."  That my friends is the true nature of this work - and others - just an expression of who I am and how I am, and what I would rather be.  I've wanted regret and remorse, I've seen it in others (yeah, in those AA meetings you've mentioned - a room full of victims a lot of whom seem to be there to share stories of how horrible they are or to one up each other on who was the worst addict, father, mother, etc.  I had had my fill of that "I can drink you under the table" mentality years ago.)

I will apologize now, if I seem too harsh, bitter, insulting, or whatever may be offending anyone.  Offense is not my attempt.  This reply, like most of my poetry, started as me wanting to make a simple comment and has taken off as my fingers went to work on the keyboard ~ I never know where I will end up until I click that submit button

Okay, I'm done now, for now.  Mainly because I forgot my point and don't want to type this reply for the rest of the day.

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful"  

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

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