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Open Poetry #25
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Toerag
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a

0 posted 2003-02-27 11:40 AM



No American Idol...Not Joe Millionaire...
Just Balladeer


Balladeer just wanted
A little recognition
But he couldn't find a single way
In his old age condition.

He tried most every avenue
His simple mind could think
But having little talent
He just simply stinks.

He auditioned for the "Idol" show,
His songs like poems weren't 'rhymin'
The judges all just shook their heads,
(With laughter from old Simon)

He'd tried out for Joe Millionaire,
But at the interview,
They saw his body and declined,
And he only had one tooth.

Balladeer just gave up,
But had to make a living,
Now he runs a local route
With machines he bought for vending.

"Live Bait" machines at Magic Marts
On every beach in 'Flor-da'
No record deals or fame for 'Deer'
No love life with sweet Zora.

~*~

Toerag



© Copyright 2003 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
Brad Majors
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Georgia
1 posted 2003-02-27 11:42 AM


I love this !
suthern
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Louisiana
2 posted 2003-02-27 11:44 AM


ROFLMAO... but he gets to go fishing any time he wants... even on workdays! LOL Of course, we'll have to tell him about rods and flies and such... otherwise, he'll be hitting those poor finned things with a golf club! LOL

I love this, Toe! *S*

Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

3 posted 2003-02-27 12:17 PM


(chuckling)..
You know I heard he tried out for "Weakest Link" and they had to turn him down there too... seems when they went through the screening process the Other potential contestants wouldn't stay in teh same room with him... come to find out..he had some of that live bait in his pocket from a delivery he was supposed to have made last week...
took them a couple of days to get the smell out of that interview room...


garysgirl
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Florida, USA
4 posted 2003-02-27 12:27 PM


    





(getting away from the odor)  LOL  

Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
5 posted 2003-02-27 12:32 PM


Hey Toe,
I've seen him hook many a fish with his golf club. LOL If you know what I mean.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2003-02-27 01:02 PM


my day will be good now, starting off with such a laugh....
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
7 posted 2003-02-27 01:15 PM


Call me shallow, but I love the reality shows and your poem is a slice of that reality!
Now I am picturing Balladeer as a participant in each of them, and darned if they wouldn't have been even better if he had actually been in them! lol

Warm giggling hugs,
EA

lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
8 posted 2003-02-27 03:04 PM



I'm with earth angel, He's got a spice "they" don't seem to have. Maybe "toe" could try out too. They could be the dynamic duo. Now that would be a kick....

dale


Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
9 posted 2003-02-27 04:27 PM


Awww, poor Deer, pickin' on the ole' man like that!

hee hee!

Cor

scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
10 posted 2003-02-27 04:31 PM


Balladeer isn't fishing..he's doing quality control..

believe in what your heart feels...

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
11 posted 2003-02-27 04:45 PM


Thanks to all for the replies.....but, as much as I hate to pass this along..Bally wrote a fantastic "one" about me in "Behind Closed Doors" forum......and being the good sport that I am...it is worth taking a gander at.....and, if I was 30 years younger....I'd be the next American Idol...now though....I'm just the American Antique!!!
suthern
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Louisiana
12 posted 2003-02-27 04:49 PM


If that's the case, no wonder why you're such a treasure... and so priceless! LOL
Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
13 posted 2003-02-27 06:13 PM



I heard 'deer was the American Idle!!!

nakdthoughts
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since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
14 posted 2003-02-27 06:22 PM


after having seen the Deer one up close and  sort of personal...I believe he would be a good catch...at whatever age.


M

Shoot you had to go and leave that link to Deer's poem. I hadn't scrolled all the way down yet, stopped at the baby looking down...and should have guessed what was coming next... !!You Two!!!

[This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (02-27-2003 06:26 PM).]

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
15 posted 2003-02-27 07:34 PM




LOL! Oh my gosh, Balladeer doesn't need to be an uncle on The Osbournes or a contestant on Am I Hot? when most people have no clue what the definition of sexy is, he is a celebrity all by himself! (big hugggssssss) This is funny, sweet friend, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Toerag, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton


"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

[This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (02-27-2003 07:35 PM).]

Wind
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since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

16 posted 2003-02-27 08:04 PM


Well even Balladeer is smarter than the guy on Joe Millionare. I read somewhere on the net that he has the inteligence of a toaster. Which I think is an insult. (to household appliances) Don't listen to me, I only feel pity for Balladeer and want to stick up for him. Where have these insane poems been?
Balladeer
Administrator
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since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
17 posted 2003-02-27 08:12 PM


Well, what's wrong with vending machines? If there had been a proper one around for your daddy, you wouldn't have been born!!

Actually, I got a very nice letter from the producers of American Idol advising me I was being turned down because it just wouldn't be fair to the rest of the contestants. I humbly agreed...

Nice little write here, toe wagger. I shall see if I can return the favor. By the way, when it comes to bait, you are the master!

Maureen, you are such a good woman. When all others forsake me you are there to give me support....you're wonderful!!

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
18 posted 2003-02-27 08:35 PM


"Well, what's wrong with vending machines? If there had been a proper one around for your daddy, you wouldn't have been born!! "

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
19 posted 2003-02-27 11:04 PM


Toerag - he's just a Balladeer, me thinks...

BC

Tammy Blessing
Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 366
PA
20 posted 2003-02-27 11:04 PM


Well what a way to end a day!! You guys are still picking on one another and cracking everyone up in the process I see (and chuckle). But I must say...something seems kinda "fishy" about that toewag story. I think your last picture gave him WAY to much credit in the tackle department!! LOL
Tammy

Mysteria
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since 2001-03-07
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British Columbia, Canada
21 posted 2003-02-28 12:27 PM


You know - you guys are what make our day light when we stop in here, and like I said to Michael, that is magic, to make people laugh and smile in troubled times.  I am laughing, smiling and thankful for you guys.

           
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
Aretha Franklin  

Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
22 posted 2003-04-28 12:57 PM


You crack me up....
Cruel....just cruel!!!!
Now I have to go read what YOU'VE been up to!!!
Bridgette

"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again.  To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown


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