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Open Poetry #25
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kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore

0 posted 2003-02-27 04:07 AM


Restraint
emotions chained
naive mind turns bouncer
preventing eruption fiercely
Grown-up

© Copyright 2003 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved
inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
1 posted 2003-02-27 06:48 AM


its hard to bottle it up sometimes, when you want
someone to feel your wrath, that deserves it.
nice poem, peaceful and all

[This message has been edited by inkedgoddess (02-27-2003 06:49 AM).]

regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
2 posted 2003-02-27 08:13 AM



Kaile,

Simple yet wise, defining maturity.
I like this form, tho. haven't tried writing with it.


Enjoyed, Pat


..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
3 posted 2003-02-27 09:17 AM


Kaile,
you've written well of what it means to have self control and be grown up. Like the form, too. After walking through a highschool hall everyday, and even in interactions with many (alot) of adults I see that not many people are grown up. Glad you are
Enjoyed.

Always, Alyssa

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2003-02-27 09:20 AM


Very nice...I enjoy this style.
~Hugs & Smiles, Nancy~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
5 posted 2003-02-27 09:33 AM


I can SEE it! One fist (the one that doesn't show) clenched, lips tight, eyes straight, holding it in..... Well done!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

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