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Open Poetry #25
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INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA

0 posted 2003-02-26 02:44 PM



caressed by raindrops
the old willow combs her hair
and bows to the wind

© Copyright 2003 KKunnen - All Rights Reserved
Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
1 posted 2003-02-26 02:49 PM




(smiles) Awwwwwww, I love this, sweet friend, wepping willows are one of my absolute favorite trees and I just love in spring when they bud and sway with the wind! (big hugggssss) Every day has its way, even weeping willows weep in joy many days, God Bless You, this would be perfect for Reflections, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2003-02-26 02:51 PM


Very nicely done...
if I may...


Invisible wind,
I know where you are, when the
Old willows curtsey.


~Hugs, Nancy~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2003-02-26 02:59 PM


Love the imagery!
This is a little piece of perfection! Truly!

Warm hugs,
Earth Angel

Charisma
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since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
4 posted 2003-02-26 04:00 PM


Beautiful......

Charisma

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

5 posted 2003-02-26 04:18 PM


i like this
but may i offer another version?

caressed by raindrops
weeping willow combs her hair
and bows to the wind

Marge Tindal
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since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
6 posted 2003-02-26 04:36 PM


InClan~
Nobody .... but nobody does it better~
So nice to see you~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com                        

INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA
7 posted 2003-02-26 06:26 PM


Thank you all for stopping by.  Noah, you are such a flirt. Nancy and Krawdad, Your suggestions are very welcome. I was picturing an old bent willow tree near my previous home in Lafayette, IN. Since this is a Japanese form, my thoughts moved to a long black haired Japanese lady bowing to comb out her hair....the rest took care of itself.  Marge, I have read and respected so much of your work that your praise humbles me.

INclan

kaile
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since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
8 posted 2003-02-27 03:56 AM


i dig the personification here...
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
9 posted 2003-02-27 10:30 AM



This is simple beauty.


Enjoyed greatly. Pat


..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
10 posted 2003-02-27 11:20 AM


INclan
Good one, enjoyed.

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
11 posted 2003-02-27 12:10 PM


*EXCELLENT*

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
12 posted 2003-02-27 01:10 PM


BRAVO!
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
13 posted 2003-02-27 01:26 PM



Sir...

wonderful.

Joannak
Member
since 2000-03-11
Posts 121
Indiana, USA
14 posted 2003-02-28 09:30 AM


INclan,
you are a master of description in few words.  I very much liked this one, and I hope we will be seeing more on a regular basis.  Missed you here.
Joanna

What better way to become immortal than to wake up each day and write?   Ray Bradbury



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