»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #25
»
Sunlight..............2nd Cinquain
| Open Poetry #25 |
|
Sunlight..............2nd Cinquain |
|
garysgirl  
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA 
|
A bright yellow Shining in sky above Makes a person feel the warmth Sunshine [This message has been edited by garysgirl (02-25-2003 09:02 PM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Ethel GG Kent - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
Now this is beautiful Cold hands means a warm heart |
||
|
inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
ethel, i need some florida sun, like right about now, make me dream, something, fast...too cold in NJ |
||
|
regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Ethel, Haven't a clue as to rules of Cinquain, so wouldn't know if this is correct or not. However I love the bright yellow lettering you used with subject Sunshine! Hugs, Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
||
|
Connel
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736Florida, USA |
Beautiful.. lol Anyone can write, But only poets can capture the heart. |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Me likes...too!  I think a cinquain needs to follow a small rule, with syllables, specifically... 2 4 6 8 2 I think your fourth line, Ethel, needs one little oomph.... like, "makes a person feel the warmth" [in keeping with your thought pattern]... and I KNOW this was not for me, but it left a wonderful glow! [This message has been edited by Sunshine (02-25-2003 07:45 PM).] |
||
|
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
~*~ Ethel Is a poet And Gary is her love, Together may they both grow old. ~ True love ~*~ May blessings fall from the stars to light your path together... Linda P.S. I love how you are venturing into different waters with your poetry! [This message has been edited by Earth Angel (02-25-2003 07:59 PM).] |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Julie, Thank you. I'm glad that you like it....  . . Michele, I wish I could give you some Florida sun. It's supposed to rain tomorrow and Thursday, though... . Heart Hugs to you both....  Ethel |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Pat, I'm just learning. Nan has it in her workshop for this month and I decided to try it. It's lots of fun. Karilea wrote the rules of Cinquain in her reply. I had messed up on my fourth line, but fixed it with her help. This is what each of the five lines are supposed to have in them. . . 1st line.....2 syllables (the title) 2nd line.....4 syllables (describes the title) 3rd line.....6 syllables (states an action) 4th line.....8 syllables (expresses a feeling) 5th line.....2 syllables (another word for the title) . . Thanks about the color. And, you might want to try some of this. They really are fun.... Hugs, Ethel |
||
|
Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
It's nice hereing your lovely poems again. the Wind is invisible. |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Connel, Thank you. I'm glad you liked it. Hugs, Ethel |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Karilea, I really did think of you when I wrote it...  I don't know how I messed up with the syllable count on that line. I've got the rules for the basic Cinquain written down that Nan gave us, and was looking at them when I wrote it. Thanks for pointing it out to me. I fixed it. I'm glad it made you feel good... . . Hugs, Ethel |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
I loved the poem you wrote for us. Gary will like it, too. Thanks for the compliment, too. I appreciate it.... . . Hugs, Ethel |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Hi Liz  It's good to see you. I'm missing seeing your poetry on here. Love ya Heart Hugs, Ethel  |
||
|
GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
its 3:40 AM right now, but this made me feel warm and light! Great job Ethel Always, Alyssa - And so it was that time stood still - |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
 |
||
|
Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(smiles) Oh Ethel, this got me humming "Here Comes The Sun" in my head, yay!!! (kiss on cheek) It is one of my favorite songs of all time with U2's "With or Without You" and Live's "Lightning Crashes", it always brings a smile to my face hearing it or humming it, God Bless You, you truly are sunshine to our hearts like Karilea is, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ethel, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
||
|
NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
Ethel, How I love 'little' poems. So few words, so much said ... if done correctly and you did a good job. Love the bright, sunny yellow color. Huggles ... Dwelling on the negative simply |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
cool! |
||
|
SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Looks to me like you are doing really good. |
||
|
Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Transition .... Sunlight ---> Sunshine Moving from something that's exerior, to something that has warmed you on the inside -- now THAT'S poetry! ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
||
|
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
lovely |
||
|
Goldboat Member
since 2003-02-17
Posts 66 |
Thank you for your good poem. I am going to translate the poem into Chinese. If you agree, I will post it to some web sites in Chinese, such as: http://www.toppoem.com/list.asp?boardid=15 http://www.likk.com/cgi-bin/forums.cgi?forum=34 http://www.poemlife.com.cn/forum/list.jsp?forumID=6 http://www.liufangdi.com/index_2.asp http://www2.bbsland.com/cgi-bin/tea.cgi |
||
|
Goldboat Member
since 2003-02-17
Posts 66 |
Ñô¹â Ã÷ÁÁ½ð»Æ ÕÕÒ«ÔÚÌì¿ÕÉÏ Ê¹Ò»¸öÈ˸оõÎÂů Ñô¹â Please tell me is that OK? [This message has been edited by Goldboat (03-28-2003 06:48 PM).] |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Goldboat, it's okay as long as you will be sure to put my name on the poem. That really makes me feel good that you want people to see it. Thank you. Ethel [This message has been edited by garysgirl (03-28-2003 07:00 PM).] |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Alyssa, Karilea Noah Martie Dixie Sue Ed Vandana Goldboat . . Everybody, I apologize for not responding to all your replies before now. I think this must have got lost in the fast shuffle of poems, or something, until Goldboat brought it back up. . . I really do thank all of you and appreciate each one of you for reading and replying to my poems. Love and Heart Hugs to you all, Ethel |
||
|
Goldboat Member
since 2003-02-17
Posts 66 |
Sure! |
||
|
Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
Tis a lovely the thing the sun is, as are your words |
||
|
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
On a dark and dreary day such as it is here, your bit of Sunlight helped brighten the view! Love & Light, Linda |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Goldboat, |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Raph, Thank you very much, friend. "Love makes the world go around" |
||
|
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Linda, Thank you. The sun was shining pretty on the day I wrote this. Today, it's going in and out....mostly cloudy, though. I'm glad the poem brought you some sunshine, though. "Love makes the world go around" |
||
|
littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Ethel - how did I miss this one? Well I found it now and it is lovely . . . cant wait for the sun . . . xxoo |
||
|
carol Senior Member
since 2003-01-25
Posts 624Florida USA |
Ethel, this is very good I like the Florida sun also when it shines Rita Real friends celebrate in who we are and have faith in all that we can become |
||
|
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
beautiful |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
