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Jackson & Jake/ Duncan & JM

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Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


0 posted 02-17-2003 06:39 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Janet Marie

Spooked


I didn’t wait much longer,
across the road from Iambe’s.
I’d been tastin’ a cold beer for hours,
so that, and the sudden storm clouds,
were the reasons I gave myself for leaving,
but spooked is what my Grandma
would’ve called it.

Plain old spooked.

I turned the truck around
and headed back into town,
and Jake’s Place.
Pulled up just before the rain.
The place was near empty.
I walked to the end of the bar
and a stool by the poker machine.

‘What can I get ya sweetie?’
‘Beer’
‘Think I got one a those’

She smiled like she almost meant it.

My eyes followed as she walked,
but only out of habit.
My mind was back at Iambe’s.
I reached for the bottle
already frosting as she sat it on the bar.


‘Jake been around today?’
‘No darlin, said he had some business out at Iambe’s.
Left early this mornin’.’
‘You a friend a his?’
‘Yeah’


I wasn’t looking for conversation
but I didn’t mind listening to her voice.
It wrapped warm arms
around you from behind
and hid it’s breath in your neck.
The thought of her bed
entered a corner of my mind.


‘Ya’ll look alike, ya know that?’
‘What? I’m sorry, I was…’
‘You and Jake. You got the same eyes’
‘Can’t say I’ve noticed. Can I get another beer’?’
‘A mans eyes on a boys face’
‘Beer, please?’, I repeated
‘Relax sweetie, we got plenty’
... ... ...

Two days and a nasty hangover later,
she woke me asking if I was hungry.
As I slowly and vaguely
remembered where I was, the smell
of bacon tempted me to full consciousness.
I’d passed hungry long ago.


I reached for a beer I’d left
sitting in the window and looked down
onto the street below.


‘Jake’s here, least his truck’s out front’
‘So why don’t ya put down that beer
and go talk to him. Maybe that’ll stop ya
talking in your sleep.’


Duncan


--------------------------

Bruised


Jake was sitting at a table in the corner
by the window, when Jackson came down the
stairs looking like shredded tire.
Jake could only shake his head and laugh.

"My bartender take good care of you?"

"I wish I could remember," Jackson hoarsely countered.

Kate walked to the table with coffee and laughed playfully.

"Good thing I learned a long time ago not to take
anything a hung over cowboy says personally."

She pushed Jackson's sun burnt, bleached hat down
over his eyes and asked Jake if he wanted anymore
bacon or eggs, then headed back to the kitchen.
Both men watched her swish and sway away.

"Damn she wears those jeans as tight as
my seat covers," Jackson admired.

"Eat your breakfast kid, we got places to be
and work to do. "

Jake sat and stared out the window as Jackson
finished his eggs. Both men had much on their
minds but true to nature, neither were talking.
They seemed an odd pairing of sidekicks to some,
Jackson being several years younger than Jake.

Both grew up in the same town. Jake had seen Jackson in
many of the same pool halls and cattle calls through the
years, for whatever reason, he was just always around.
But it wasn't until they ended up on the same rodeo circuit
that they became padres. They got drunk together one night
after both got their egos and backends bruised by a bronc,
and from then on it just seemed they shadowed one another.

After breakfast they headed out in Jake's truck.
Before leaving town, Travis had told him about some
horses that a mutual friend had for sale. Jake wanted to
take a look at them. They rode out to the ranch in silence,
each caught up in their thoughts. Ever since Konrad had
came back to town with that damned death certificate,
it was like a storm squall of change had blown in.

Both Travis and Konrad took off in their own personal
dust clouds, leaving Jake and his sisters waiting to see
what would wash up in their wakes. Jake wondered what
was bothering the kid. Jackson had been like a skittish colt
ever since he showed up at Iambes and heard the news.

He made a mental note to ask Kate what she
might know when he got back to the bar.
Cowboys have a tendency to talk too much when
washing down the dust with a few too many brew,
maybe she could shed some light on Jackson's lament.
After all, she knew the reasons behind the bleed of bruises,
the black and blues that can only be seen when a cowboy
takes his boots off.


JM

~~~


[This message has been edited by Janet Marie (02-17-2003 09:35 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Janet Marie - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


1 posted 02-17-2003 06:46 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

Ok you two... now... if you don't write more to this and finish what you've started... I'm going to have a fit..

very well done... I love the way it unfolds and the story line. I think another wrinkle or two is in the offing here.. So lets see them... ( chuckling)

good telling... very good telling

Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


2 posted 02-17-2003 06:47 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Well hand me a present plunked down in  a cowboy's chapeau...
you did good, girl, good, tight, kept the
characters all in their own darn spotlights...

yep, you did good.

Konrad's nodding, too.
kayjay
Member Elite
since 06-24-2002
Posts 2334
Oregon


3 posted 02-17-2003 06:48 PM       View Profile for kayjay   Email kayjay   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for kayjay

What marvelous characters!! The pick ups, the bar, the quiet men.  I long to see this in a movie where the implications are to be seen.  KJ

Through rubble and trouble and dark of night
The yawn of a dawn will hasten the light

Denise
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since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


4 posted 02-17-2003 06:56 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Excellent piece of writing! I thoroughly enjoyed this!
regards2you
Member Elite
since 10-01-2002
Posts 4192
California


5 posted 02-17-2003 07:03 PM       View Profile for regards2you   Email regards2you   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for regards2you



This is amazing. First off, I enjoy the depth created the longer I got into the story line. Much to read between the lines and yet you put us in each scene.

Secondly, this is my favorite line...
I liked it so much I reread it couple times.

".............voice,"
it wrapped warm arms
around you from behind
and hid its breath
in your neck,"

I love that!  Enjoyed both parts a great deal.

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 10-28-1999
Posts 5247
state of confusion


6 posted 02-17-2003 07:05 PM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

Good story tellin' here, JM!

Cor
JamesMichael
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since 11-16-1999
Posts 31622
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


7 posted 02-17-2003 07:08 PM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

A pleasure to read...James
Seymour Tabin
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since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


8 posted 02-17-2003 07:19 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

JM,
Maybe you should write a few short stories, you have the talent for it. Enjoyed this write very much.
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


9 posted 02-17-2003 07:22 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

(chuckling)... as I said over in 24... seems others think the same...
so why not pursue it?
Enchantress
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since 08-14-2001
Posts 37801
Somewhere in time~


10 posted 02-17-2003 07:23 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

Brava!!!  Much enjoyed...fantastic imagery took me there.
May we see more please?
~Hugs~

~ Trace my body with your words..
And in doing so, you touch my heart. ~

Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


11 posted 02-17-2003 07:24 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


One moody muse kickin' another...
who'da figgered?

Cpat Hair
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12 posted 02-17-2003 07:43 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

If that is what is happening..I'm springing for both of them a pair of pointed toe boots... figuring if they are gonna kick each other might as well make it easy for them to have an incentive... those pointed toes can surely hurt.. ( chuckling)
Mistletoe Angel
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since 12-17-2000
Posts 34089
City of Roses


13 posted 02-17-2003 07:52 PM       View Profile for Mistletoe Angel   Email Mistletoe Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Mistletoe Angel's Home Page   View IP for Mistletoe Angel



(smiles) Yay!!! Oh my gosh, cowboys gotta make sure they step their spurs upon the right hardwood floor too and be familiar with the atmosphere and that alderwood scent, this is wonderful, I love the new forks and confluences in this marvelous tale, yay, we all love you both so much! You have such beautiful hearts, sweet Janet and Duncan, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Duncan
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since 08-07-2001
Posts 5716


14 posted 02-17-2003 08:11 PM       View Profile for Duncan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Duncan

Hey...who ya callin' moody???  
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
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California


15 posted 02-18-2003 12:06 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Excellent you two...thoroughly enjoyed!!
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


16 posted 02-18-2003 12:55 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

Thanks everyone for reading our novelette
Special thanks to Ron and Kari for their inspirational influences in this series.

Dunc..thanks for writing with the moth...
and for the inspiration. Seems me moody muse writes better for cowboys and porch puppies
Duncan
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since 08-07-2001
Posts 5716


17 posted 02-18-2003 08:20 AM       View Profile for Duncan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Duncan

Thanks everyone for reading our story.  Thanks Ron, Kari and JM for writing a family that it's always 'interesting' to hang out with.  
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
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18 posted 02-18-2003 09:59 AM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

hmmm.. well... so.... you just leaving us here hanging now? Get off your lazy duffs and write the rest of this...

you two trying to drive me nuts or what? ( no wait..I'm already nuts... never mind..)

So... long lost brother here? cousin? son from an early childhood affair? half brother?

you gonna tell this or not??????

Darn your mothy wings...both of you!

I think you enjoy torturing me...
(laughing)

Duncan
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since 08-07-2001
Posts 5716


19 posted 02-18-2003 10:17 AM       View Profile for Duncan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Duncan

My part's done Ron, just waiting on the moody moth.  (I musta done something really bad in a previous life... ).
Think you're tortured???  I KNOW what happens!!!  
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


20 posted 02-18-2003 10:21 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Konrad's somewhere in Belize, or so his last postcard said...he'll get around to leaving a note on a tree, I think...
Duncan
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since 08-07-2001
Posts 5716


21 posted 02-18-2003 10:29 AM       View Profile for Duncan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Duncan


'...a note on a tree'

Okay Konrad!  Mind giving Jake a call, tell him...Jackson's waiting!
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


22 posted 02-18-2003 10:30 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

The moth has left the building ...




Duncan
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since 08-07-2001
Posts 5716


23 posted 02-18-2003 10:32 AM       View Profile for Duncan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Duncan


GET BACK HERE YA SLACKER!!!!!
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


24 posted 02-18-2003 10:51 AM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

well... I never saw such an uncooperative bunch of slackers in my life...

I'll just leave you all to figure out whose turn it is to write next and go write something about Oklahoma...

I STILL WANT SOME ANSWERS HERE!!!!!!

get off your hineys..and get to writing!!
 
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