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Bob K
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since 2007-11-03
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0 posted 2009-08-03 08:47 PM



     Sorry to be putting this in The Alley, but that's where our last Free Verse Discussion went.  I'm not sure where else it might go.  Any suggestions are welcome, as long as they're not anatomical.

     I have an exercise to propose for a free verse piece.

     And I noticed the one that Ringo put up, and I'm actually working on it myself.  So thank you, Ringo; I'm not sure where it's getting me but the journey is a lot of fun, and that's about all I can ask for.

     My exercise is this.  

     Go to a place where you have other people's poems.  They should be poems that you really like a lot, and that have been published someplace, and that really ring your chimes.  If you have any foreign languages, use something from that, though it's not necessary.

     Read the poem a couple of times, so you really get a sense of the movement and flow of the poem, and what you like about it.

     Now, start at the beginning, and line by line, change everything in that poem.  I mean everything.  If the poem starts,

I love Paris in the Springtime  

you might try, for example,

My third Grade teacher was tepid about Trenton all through the fall;

or,

Nobody goes to Hong Kong for its earthquakes.

     The idea is to go through the entire poem in this way and to write a sort of parallel text.  When you finish a first draft, go back and make and changes you want to make for continuity, pacing, sound and overall fun.  Share them, and we can talk about them back and forth.

     If you'd like to see an example of a finished version of one, check out Donald Justice's "Warm, Peach Colored Ode."

     Any thoughts and questions are welcome.

© Copyright 2009 Bob K - All Rights Reserved
Alison
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1 posted 2009-08-03 11:55 PM


This sounds fun.  I'm game.  It might take me a bit of time, but I will be thinking and working on it.

Alison

Bob K
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since 2007-11-03
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2 posted 2009-08-04 01:32 AM




     Thanks, Alison.  I'm interested to see what you come up with.

Sunshine
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3 posted 2009-08-04 10:37 AM


Does the originating poem need to be referenced?


Bob K
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4 posted 2009-08-04 11:05 AM




     Only if it helps you write the poem.  

     We can't have the original in this space because of  possible copyright problems, and we don't want to use any original text at all anyway.

     One of the things that the exercise does is it generates a poem — always a welcome thing — and another, if you pay attention, is that it gives you some insight into the actual patterns that the poet you admire was using to make the poem you like so much.  How did he go about doing this?  Because you're having to deal with some of the same issues yourself in the process of construction.

     Don't bang your head about that part, though; just have fun and let the playfulness rule.  

All my best, Bob Kaven

moonbeam
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5 posted 2009-08-11 05:39 PM


Bob, did you receive my e-mail regarding this?

Regards

Rob

Bob K
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6 posted 2009-08-12 02:03 PM




Dear Rob,

          I'm there.  I've lost the email itself.

Best, BobKaven

moonbeam
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7 posted 2009-08-12 06:06 PM


Dear Bob

I'll try resending again tomorrow. (My tomorrow!)

Hope you're doing ok.

Regards

Rob

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8 posted 2009-08-14 04:52 AM


Hello Bob

I re-sent yesterday.  Any chance of you confirming you got it?  Sorry to use this thread to communicate but I can't think of any other way.

Regards

Rob

Alison
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9 posted 2009-08-15 02:14 PM


Bob K,

Well, I did try this and found how "Alley-shy" I am.  I talked myself out of posting it in here.  However, it's here:
/pip/Forum110/HTML/001593.html

It's tough to work with another poem as you suggested, but it was fun too.

A

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