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serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2005-04-12 06:29 AM


And really, it is.

I mean even considering the distant tragedies of deaths, poor health, finances, natural disasters, and just the overwhelming realization of the actuality of all of these at the same time--add to that my personal losses, your personal losses, and all the woes-of-me that I could stuff a black hole with--still--still--

I would like a glass of milk.

You'd think that would be easy, huh?

But noooooooooooooooooooooo....



Folks? The way my life is going?

Don't tell anyone in my family this but -

pssssssssssttt

I have a roll of toilet paper hidden in my file cabinet.

nod

I've got a bad feeling that's the next thang...


© Copyright 2005 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2005-04-12 06:45 AM


Here's one--I just heard on the news that Martha Stewart has filed a formal complaint regarding her ankle bracelet--um, it ain't Tiffany's, but the one that keeps her under house arrest alert--

It seems the damned thing chafes. *pout*

Kit McCallum
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2 posted 2005-04-12 07:03 AM


Karen, if I could send you some milk, I would ...


Would you like that processed?



or ...

fresh?  




I'd send you some TP,
but it looks like you've got that covered.  

serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2005-04-12 07:08 AM


Well, I'd settle for that second one, if you freeze the cow first. (Do they do that?) grin...prolly in Michigan, huh?)

I like my milk cold. (The TP? I'll take room temperature, thanks.)



thanks Kit!

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
4 posted 2005-04-12 09:29 AM


*nods*...

I have been hiding things since the day I stupidly taught my children to get their own cereal...they have been helping themselves to everything since. Including my floor...

yes..my floor..

Saturday night/Sunday morning-

4am...Me and another went out to the kitchen to get a snack (people stay focused on the story).  We were talking in a normal voice when we heard..breathing...we look at each other, then in the direction of the breathing, which was coming from the floor. I walk towards the area and see two forms on the floor...I look back at the person I had come out in the kitchen with and say, "Who are those people on my floor?" Rhetorical question as he had no idea...so I crept closer...and actually leaned over the one sleeping on the mattress of my futon.."Hey! That's my oldest son (who does not live with me). But I don't know who that other person is." (the other person was actually on the floor under a table).

As it turns out, my oldest (21 this year) and a friend crashed at my house and didn't even bother telling me that was the plan.

So hide the toilet paper even when they move out...you just never know when they will be back.  

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

Sunshine
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5 posted 2005-04-12 10:03 AM


If it ain't cold...don't serve milk.
Unless it's hot, and then add chocolate.

Toilet paper. How our minds move when moving from house to house.  First thought before I even started packing, was to make sure to put on my list "toilet paper" so I would hav some at the new house as we are moving in. And seeing as I have an extra bathroom, I put down "two packages" instead of one.  Or one really BIG one and split three ways.

Nothing gripes me more than being without TP or being served warm milk.

Well, that's not true.  There ARE other things.


Balladeer
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6 posted 2005-04-12 10:16 AM


MILK!!?? I think this calls for more than that!





     

SEA
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with you
7 posted 2005-04-12 10:18 AM


my gripe? When I was a kid I could CHUG a glass of milk... now I can't even begin to drink a plain glass of milk without gagging. I have no idea what happened. Sometimes I can drink it with chocolate in it, but for the most part, I don't touch the stuff. *sigh*

don't even get me started on the TP gripe...lol

Martie
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8 posted 2005-04-12 11:03 AM


sigh...since I got....er.....older...I've become lactose intolerant.  
Alicat
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since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
9 posted 2005-04-12 11:13 AM


Susan, you forgot the other thing.  Yes, hide the TP, but never forget to change the locks!

Milk.  I've had some oddities there, at least to me.  Like irradiated skim milk (blue milk ain't natural) served at outside temp in a bag lunch while in Army Basic back in 95.  Irradiated shelf stable goat and cow milk (not blended, mind ya) while in Europe in mid-1990.  Now, I could certainly understand alternatives to cow's milk for those who are either allergic or lactose intolerant.  But 'normal' folk who drink and train themselves to 'enjoy' soy milk and concoctions brewed up in a chemists' lab are just silly.  Then again, you could drink all the milk you want and it won't do you a lick of good unless you actually go out in the sun for about 15-30 minutes, where a wonderful photosynthetic experience happens: the conversion of calcium or Vitamin D into calciferol or Vitamin D3, the stuff which actually goes into the formation of bones, ligaments, skin, tissue, hair, and sundry organs.  Actually, you don't need direct sunlight, just the UV radiation.  Hence the popularity of 'sunlamps' used in northern zones in the US and almost all of Russia.

Christopher
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10 posted 2005-04-12 11:39 AM


can we really say "back" in '95 now, Ali?

egowhores.com - really love yourself.

Sunshine
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11 posted 2005-04-12 11:43 AM


It's ten years, the answer is 'yes', Son.


Midnitesun
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Gaia
12 posted 2005-04-12 06:42 PM


I'll sip some moo juice withya if I can top it off with something...er, yummy like Kahlua. And I'll save you at least 10 sheets from my hidden spare roll.   
But seriously, I sure hope you are finding a moment or two for quiet, and solo reflection.

serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

13 posted 2005-04-12 07:30 PM


Now where's the little "Got Milk" smilie?

It's a good day when your problems are easily remedied. <--ya gotta picture that with the milk mustache folks--I'm graphically challenged yanno.

LoveBug
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14 posted 2005-04-12 08:11 PM


Gosh, I love milk! I can chug milk like any 5 year old, and I'm 20! I'd rather have milk than alcohol! I lile my milk plain, 2 percent, thank you...

Too bad i'm so fat!! If I wasn't, I'd go through a gallon a day! I use (some) restraint, though!

Love's a lovely lad
His bringing up is beauty
Who loves him not is mad
For I must pay him duty
-Anonymous

Local Rebel
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since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
15 posted 2005-04-20 06:04 PM


note to self...

to attract women in supermarket put biggest package of toilet paper in cart

SEA
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with you
16 posted 2005-04-20 06:28 PM


roflmao...I think you could just stand there and women would flock to whatever you were looking at....
Mysteria
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17 posted 2005-04-20 09:01 PM


Image hosted by Photobucket.com

I think I have way too much time on my hands! LOL

timothysangel1973
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18 posted 2005-05-06 03:01 AM


I just came across this one... but man oh man...

I don't care what time of day I go to the bathroom, or for what reason... there ain't never no toilet paper on the dang roll... just a little bit stuck to the glue on the cardboard cylinder...

I've started hiding some in my makeup kit just in case... dern youngin's

And.. this entire thread reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Elaine is in a public restroom and she does her business only to realize there isn't any paper...

So, she asks the lady next to her for some and the lady refuses and she says "You won't even spare a square?"

A square?
Dear God... that would be just enough to piss me off...

And Reb?

Your replies always make me laugh outloud...

Christopher
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19 posted 2005-05-06 11:49 AM


i've got brownies today.

egowhores.com - really love yourself.

Sunshine
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20 posted 2005-05-06 12:07 PM


I've got Oreos...and MILK
LeeJ
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since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

21 posted 2005-05-06 12:27 PM


mmmmmm, love milk, cold, with ice, in a frosted glass....yummy...and I've found something as good, vanilla soybean milk, very very tasty and good for ya!

Good Luck Serenity...wishing you the best, the tables will turn....for the better...that I promise.

Hey, why don't you go to Cold Stone with me...we'll make a spendid sundae?  

Kaoru
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22 posted 2005-05-07 11:44 PM


I've used baby wipes before, and let me tell ya, they aren't half bad!


lol

Sometimes, I feel as if MY gripes aren't even earned.. but, when it comes to toilet paper and cold milk, I feel ya.

Although, I am lactose intolerant, I still would shed a single tear if my chocolate soy milk had been consumed without my permission.

Tell your loved ones that for mother's day, you deserve the best...

....two ply.



Aenimal
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since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
23 posted 2005-05-08 12:11 PM


nothin says l#vin like a bouqet of toilet paper..

i just made the switch to soy milk, haven't gotten used to it. there's still that somebody p@$$%d in my milk aftertaste..

Martie
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24 posted 2005-05-08 11:56 AM


Raph....Rice Milk is really good!
Midnitesun
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Gaia
25 posted 2005-05-08 01:27 PM


lol at Raphie, but I don't like the taste of soy milk even though I eat a vegetarian diet filled with other soy products.
Martie, yes! Vanilla Rice Dream is yummy!!!

littlewing
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since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
26 posted 2005-05-08 08:45 PM


I could not drink a glass of milk to save my like EXCEPT if it were in:

cereal
it was chocolate
I was dipping Oreo's in it . . .



Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
27 posted 2005-05-08 10:22 PM


thanks martie i'll give it a try. vanilla soy isn't bad it just takes getting used to, but the plain soy..cripes
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