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Open Poetry #19
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Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2002-03-26 01:40 PM



She wasn’t what most
Would call a beauty.

She weighed a bit more
Than the fashions dictate
In their anorexic passion
To take all the substance
Out of what women look like
And instead turn them into
lewd caricatures of
Pre pubescence.

Her hair did not
Always behave
Nor did she

She wasn’t what most
Would call refined

She liked a cold beer
Could belch and laugh at herself,
Picked at food with her fingers
When distractions drove her someplace
Inside the walls she had so carefully built
From stones thrown at her over the years
By the ones who were supposed to love her

She wasn’t perhaps…
Until she looked at me
With those eyes that swallowed
Every bit of my soul
Leaving the empty inside
Wishing she would model for me
Her naked thoughts

© Copyright 2002 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
lunatic
Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 172

1 posted 2002-03-26 01:45 PM


This is beautiful, you rascal

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
2 posted 2002-03-26 01:48 PM


can't resist whenever I see "nakedthoughts"

I really liked this one..I don't fit that bill..although tthe non-anorexic look is me for sure *s

M

love the tenderness *s

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more, it is willing to see less."
(Will Moss)

jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

3 posted 2002-03-26 01:50 PM


oh, oh, oh....I just love this.....*big smile* you captured 'that look' that special look that 2 people share so perfectly...mostly its just 'wishes' on both parts, but sometimes, its more...you captured that part too wonderful write
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2002-03-26 01:51 PM



You have managed to make her more than beautiful...you've made her into a classic...

and a Keeper...

Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
5 posted 2002-03-26 02:48 PM


it's always that look isn't it??

well done Sir. . .great work. . .

----------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2002-03-26 02:58 PM


Ron

She sounds a bit like someone I know..loved this tender look through your eyes.

Tiersdin
Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364
east coast
7 posted 2002-03-26 04:31 PM


I really enjoyed this one very much.

*smiles*
~Tier

Larry C
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Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
8 posted 2002-03-26 10:23 PM


Ron,
Leave it to you to spot a true beauty! Way cool write. I loved it. Very well done. Thanks.

Everybody thinks of changing humanity and nobody thinks of changing himself. Leo Tolstoy

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2002-03-26 10:28 PM




(smiles) Awwwwwwww, this is soooooo gorgeous, sweet friend, your beautiful words always touch us, this is wonderful! (big hugggsssssss) We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is a true gem! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2002-03-26 10:44 PM


Oh yes...love this one...James
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
11 posted 2002-03-27 10:39 AM


I can't begin to tell you how much I liked this one... but it's being saved for many re-readings. *S*
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

12 posted 2002-03-27 11:09 AM


Many thanks to everyone for their comments!
Pure fiction folks... written from an observation of a couple the other day and my over active imagination taking it someplace it probably never was.

Thanks again!!!!

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