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Open Poetry #19
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Soleil Noir
Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688
USA

0 posted 2002-03-20 09:31 PM



I saw you

that night preceding
nuptials of fiancé to
fiancée…

I saw you

the wave of hair,
the winking eye, all
standing in silence before the image
of the man to be wed…

I saw you

as you held my heart
gently, and I knew,
behind the burning tear that dried
in frightened promise,
you would wait for me…

I saw you

Later, you came for me again,
holding my head above the drown,
lifting my heart against the world,
whispering quiet promises
of tomorrows still to
come

I saw you

Even when the second man proposed
a projected lifetime of
commitment, and committed,

I saw you

You had matured with time, holding
well against shifting sands, sounding
in a deafening silence that it
was not quite yet our time,

roads were still to be trekked, soles
needing to know calluses
before soothing, our wisdom to
be one
not quite yet
felt in the current…

I saw you…

As I see you now…still a promise
to be reserved, a taste superior
to wine, a convergence
to be finer than
any silkworm
will ever
know

wait for me…

you see me…

© Copyright 2002 Soleil Noir - All Rights Reserved
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
1 posted 2002-03-20 09:41 PM




(sigh) This is soooooo very touching, sweet friend, I know deep down with all my heart soon the time will be right and you will hold close to your heart the greatest joy your heart can ever dream of forever! (big hugggsssss) We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is wonderfully sensitive! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Soleil, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
2 posted 2002-03-20 09:47 PM


AWESOME!
This is one of the most beautiful pieces I have ever read. A resonance of love through a lifetime...I know this resonance well.
Thank you. ThisDiamond

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
3 posted 2002-03-20 09:51 PM


Excellent writing...James
Tracey
Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding
4 posted 2002-03-20 09:54 PM


Wow, this one had me mesmerized in the story. The repetition of “I saw you” has a powerful impact in the piece.

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
5 posted 2002-03-20 10:15 PM


Oh, I like this. Romantic and touching and very good. I love the repetition and the air of quiet certitude.

Nan

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
6 posted 2002-03-21 03:17 PM


love waits. . . or, do we wait. . . and still, in our waiting. . .does time wait???

well done here. . . romantic, and philosophical. . .

---------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Dulcinea
Senior Member
since 2001-07-22
Posts 774
IN
7 posted 2002-03-21 03:22 PM


A lot of courage and devotion shines through this excellent piece Soleil! Beautifully done!
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
8 posted 2002-03-21 06:24 PM


enjoy
Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
9 posted 2002-03-22 11:44 AM


Soleil,

this is one of the most beautiful
pieces of poetry i've ever read. i love
the romantic feel of this and the utter
devotion of waiting for this wonderful
person! this is just simply lovely
poetry. i am looking forward to reading
more from you. take care.
amy

"you can't stop
the rain
from pouring down
can't stop the
world from turning 'round
can't stop me from
loving you
no matter
what you do

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
10 posted 2002-03-22 12:34 PM


... almost speechless. this is a marvelous piece redolent with longing, hope, and many heavy sighs. thank you for bringing some art into my world today.

Chris

Zinsser
Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641
Calif.
11 posted 2002-03-22 03:21 PM


This is poetry.....
  perfection
  ~~ Connie~~

Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
12 posted 2002-03-23 02:11 AM


I have to agree with Chris beautifully done

~* Reality is an illusion ~ albeit a persistant one *~
Albert Einstein

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

13 posted 2002-03-23 06:50 PM


Simply beautiful...

'holding my head above the drown,
lifting my heart against the world'

soft hushed 'yes,' I understand so well.


K

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
14 posted 2002-03-23 11:08 PM


This is beautiful...sometimes that is how
it is before two come together...after
maturing and aging..and growing ever deeper
in love..

Soleil Noir
Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688
USA
15 posted 2002-03-24 06:55 PM



So many fine comments from
so many wonderful poets...
thank you all very much!

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