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Passions in Poetry

Eleven P.M. Mist

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Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


0 posted 03-15-2002 08:45 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Eleven P.M. Mist

Standing on the street corner
bathed in artificial sunlight
from the all-night street lamp;

smelling gutter stench of old leaves
and two dead rats;

listening to hungry howls of an
alley-Tom (remembering my own Tom once
called Mr.), and even this alley-Mr.,
though hunger stricken,
passes by rancid rats.

Mist comes in, cooling my face
after April’s warm afternoon;

but now chill sets in,
in the eleven p.m. mist,
this cold and
chilling eleven p.m. mist.

Wish to go home, do I.

But then beggars would ride horses
with silk manes.

Eleven p.m. mist blankets my body,
my body,
not thin,
not fat,
not in-between;

if I sleep tonight, only my spirit
will stay to be cooled by
the eleven p.m. mist.


~*~

Circa April, 1970
©KRJ
17 October 1999
revised
15 March 2002

© Copyright 2002 Karilea Rilling - All Rights Reserved
Mistletoe Angel
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since 12-17-2000
Posts 34089
City of Roses


1 posted 03-15-2002 08:51 PM       View Profile for Mistletoe Angel   Email Mistletoe Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Mistletoe Angel's Home Page   View IP for Mistletoe Angel



(big hugggssssss) Wow, this is very hauntingly beautiful, sweet friend, I too have felt the cold crisp air at night as early as 1 in the morning and it too gives me this kind of impression too sometimes! (kiss on cheek) We all love you so much, sweet friend, this is excellent! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karilea, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton
Enchantress
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since 08-14-2001
Posts 37801
Somewhere in time~


2 posted 03-15-2002 08:59 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

WoW!  Karilea, you originally wrote this is 1970?!  
But...but..that would make you about 5 years old!
Seriously...this is so hauntingly beautiful!
~Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain~

Magnus
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since 10-10-2001
Posts 14644
South Carolina, USA


3 posted 03-15-2002 09:11 PM       View Profile for Magnus   Email Magnus   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Magnus

Gosh KJ...hard to put a feeling in words
about this...very very good....that is
obvious....somewhat mysterious and haunting.

Easy to feel the mood...
strbbux
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since 12-19-2001
Posts 3975


4 posted 03-15-2002 09:16 PM       View Profile for strbbux   Email strbbux   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for strbbux

Karilea, hey girl you have been a good writer for a long time. Love this. floria

Floria

"Alas for those that never sing,
But die with all their music in them"
(Oliver Wendell Holmes)

Mysteria
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since 03-07-2001
Posts 19652
British Columbia, Canada


5 posted 03-15-2002 11:40 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

I HATE mice, rats, possum, and those other things in the desert - oh yes, armadillos!  If it wasn't you I would have "x"d this poem as I know I will have nightmares for sure! LOL, and no wonder you are good, no fair...you were good even back then - sheesh I wasn't even born yet

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.
  ~* Albert Einstein *~

mirror man
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since 01-08-2001
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6 posted 03-16-2002 12:08 AM       View Profile for mirror man   Email mirror man   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for mirror man

Very good description of the scene.  Enjoyed this.
Rex Allen McCoy
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since 01-30-2000
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Sippin a Timmy's in London


7 posted 03-16-2002 01:38 AM       View Profile for Rex Allen McCoy   Email Rex Allen McCoy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rex Allen McCoy's Home Page   View IP for Rex Allen McCoy

Brings so many thoughts to mind ... wonderful writing
ethome
Member Patricius
since 05-14-2000
Posts 11545
New Brunswick Canada


8 posted 03-17-2002 03:57 AM       View Profile for ethome   Email ethome   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit ethome's Home Page   View IP for ethome

I'm really getting quite a cool visual scene out of this piece and I love the wording.
However, I can't seem to see you there because your body is neither thin, fat nor in between.....hummm....such a misty cool scene....Love it!
Marsha
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Member Rara Avis
since 07-10-2000
Posts 7542
Maidstone Kent England


9 posted 03-17-2002 12:59 PM       View Profile for Marsha   Email Marsha   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marsha's Home Page   View IP for Marsha

Kari darling sister of my heart OH my this is incredible writing, you see how good a writer you are, you’ve always been excellent. The imagery you’ve used here is outstanding, the flow construction and presentation are superb. Is this good? Yes it is very very good. Actually it’s better than that but there’s only so many excellents I’m allowed per day and I shall soon run out of them

:loveya
Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace Luke 2:79

Tracey
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since 08-29-2001
Posts 3003
where insanity meets breeding


10 posted 03-17-2002 01:30 PM       View Profile for Tracey   Email Tracey   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Tracey

That’s neat to be able to go back so far and find poetry from back then. You are and excellent writer now, and you were an excellent writer then. Glad you posted this Karilea.

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-23-2003
Posts 7179
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass


11 posted 02-24-2005 04:59 PM       View Profile for Ratleader   Email Ratleader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ratleader's Home Page   View IP for Ratleader

Holy cow! You were THIS good THEN????

Sometimes you amaze me!

.....most of the time, in fact.....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

 
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