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Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

0 posted 2002-03-12 12:24 PM



Heart Shaped Pinata


Blindfold your pity
for a tethered heart marked "fragile"
in layers suffocated with paste that's all dried up
from paper mache tears.

There's no candy-coated smiles or prize within
nor is it decorated in kaleidoscope gown
and there is no glue strong enough
that can put my humpty dumpty dreams
back together again.

My heart is your pinata,
it's already bruised and cracked,
broken and barely hanging on.
Ill of repair with fractured beat
it no longer sways with pride in air.
So, please, you must strike it down,
at least you can get pleasure
out of something I can't.

By Melissa P. Monette



[This message has been edited by Melissa Honeybee (03-12-2002 07:43 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Melissa P. Long-Monette - All Rights Reserved
rosepetals25
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Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
1 posted 2002-03-12 12:28 PM


Melissa,

    Aww I love reading your poems, but I hate seeing them be so sad. *hugs* I hope you are happier than what this leads to belive..

Hugs,
Tara

"My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read"
     - Motley Crue, Home Sweet Home

beowulf_26
Member
since 1999-06-29
Posts 183

2 posted 2002-03-12 03:01 AM


Really really good original and innovative imagery.  In fact,  I think the idea of a pinata is strong enough that you might consider setting the first two stanzas on their own as they stick to that idea very closely and still convey strong emotion.
Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
3 posted 2002-03-12 08:21 AM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Melissa, this is so very sad, my heart goes out to your tears. (sad sigh) I hope now this feeling doesn't apply to your heart and now it is treated with trust and loving care always that you deserve so much! (kiss on cheek) My thoughts are with you, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Melissa, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
4 posted 2002-03-12 08:29 AM


Melissa,
Good original writing, enjoyed the read.

Silver Streak
Member Elite
since 2002-01-02
Posts 3625
FL, USA
5 posted 2002-03-12 08:48 AM


Fantastic poem. Although you did make a tear leak.

((Melissa))
-newell

Sharing God's Love through perfectlovepoetry.com

Copyright: 2002 Newell Elsworth Usher

Interloper
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
6 posted 2002-03-12 09:48 AM


Sadly beautiful work.  

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Alicethruglass
Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 368

7 posted 2002-03-12 11:01 AM


wow...I liked..very much...I felt this way once..you know how they say time heals..I never believed it..( I am no expert but) I think it's a combination of time and honesty and if done properly, in  a gentle way, the bitterness leaves....eventually.

hugsssss
~A~

[This message has been edited by Alicethruglass (03-12-2002 11:02 AM).]

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2002-03-12 04:58 PM


Blindfold your pity
for a tethered heart marked "fragile"
in layers suffocated with paste that's all dried up
from paper mache tears.
==============================

We are going to have to add Queen of Metaphor and theme to your title Melis...
clever moment of inspire ... written with your pen of angst.
well done poetess Melibee

You never knew what I loved in you,
I dont know what you loved in me ...
Maybe the picture of somebody you were hoping I might be.

Jackson Browne

Chelsea~
Member
since 2001-02-09
Posts 260
Ontario, CANADA
9 posted 2002-03-13 11:45 AM


missy,

you used this theme
to powerful perfection!
I liked the use of
'humpty dumpty heart'

ShadowRider
Senior Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 1038
USA
10 posted 2002-03-13 01:57 PM


Brilliantly shaped metaphors, Melissa.....and indeed, the feeling of being
a Pinata is not a pleasant one.  Seems always that the ones being struck
have not the heart to strike back and make the 'other' endure what they
dish out.  Which makes you even more caring, M.
~hugg~` and hang in there!  (no pun intended)
Jeff

Ivy Rose
Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300
MA, USA
11 posted 2002-03-13 02:00 PM


Melissa, I am so sorry that your heart has been bruised and battered.  But you did a wonderful job of conveying what you feel in this poem.  ***Ivy Rose
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
12 posted 2002-03-14 12:10 PM


What better than a pinata to be used as the metaphor for the poem, as truly it does feel like that when being hit spontaneously.  I would say it is time to definitely "get out of Mexico"

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.
  ~* Albert Einstein *~

Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
13 posted 2002-03-14 03:39 PM


this is an interesting metaphor that you've used here Melissa. . . one that lends itself quite well to the idea that you're working with here. . .

the idea that the heart, like the pinata, is beaten all too much. . .but, the heart, unlike the pinata, if empty. . . yields nothing. . .

well done my friend. . .

---------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
14 posted 2002-03-14 04:12 PM


Very different from your normal poems Melissa, but equally good written.
Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
15 posted 2002-03-14 10:57 PM


Melissa, a wonderful write. I've felt like this at times. Hope its not to real for you.



Parker

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