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Open Poetry #19
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hoot_owl_rn
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since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

0 posted 2002-02-14 11:55 AM


This poem is about missed opportunities and broken promises...It needs a bit of work, but I hope its meaning comes across none the less.
Hugs
Ruth
Into The Ocean

I remember younger years
When eight years old with childish fears
Despite my pleads, my cries, my tears
Dad took my hand and held me near
And walked into the ocean

My toes sunk swiftly in the sand
As we walked further from the land
So frightened I could barely stand
A death grip on my father’s hand
Out there in the ocean

My father kept me by his side
And led me through the rising tide
‘Till he saw my fears subside
Then looked at me with growing pride
As we stood there in the ocean

With daylight waning, growing thin
We swore that we would come again
Just dad and I, though not sure when
But boys soon grow and become men
And forget about the ocean

Oh, how time goes by so fast
Before we knew, five decades passed
Now dad and I, both here at last
With tear filled eyes, I softly cast
His ashes to the ocean

~ Ruth
www.angelfire.com/pa/OriginalMinds/index.html  

© Copyright 2002 Ruth Kephart - All Rights Reserved
Lady In White
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USA
1 posted 2002-02-14 11:59 AM



So good to see you posting Ruth...and I would not change a thing of this...it comes from your heart, and touched mine...

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
2 posted 2002-02-14 02:47 PM


Thank you dear friend...sometimes it seems I've been forgotten here, but it's always nice to slip back home if even for a short while.

~ Ruth
www.angelfire.com/pa/OriginalMinds/index.html  

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
3 posted 2002-02-14 03:16 PM


hoot_owl_rn - no changes necessary. This is most touching. Yes, the years do pass, and we wish that we could have done different things. I wonder about this, I do wonder...

BC

suthern
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since 1999-07-29
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Louisiana
4 posted 2002-02-14 03:33 PM


This is beautiful, hoot... and I can't think of anything it needs... except a home in my library. *S*
catalinamoon
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The Shores of Alone
5 posted 2002-02-14 06:30 PM


Oh what a sad ending. This must have been hard to write. I think that is the place I want to rest, at the end, also.
Sandra

vandana
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USA
6 posted 2002-02-14 06:49 PM


enjoy
Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
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Hurricane Alley
7 posted 2002-02-14 07:10 PM


Oh my....you made me cry with this one. Truly a loving tribute to your dad. I love it.
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
8 posted 2002-02-14 07:25 PM


BC, Suthern, and Vandana...thank you for the wonderful comments

PDV and Cat...sorry, this wasn't written from true experience as I don't think I could pass for a 58 year old man if I tried , but thank you for making me feel that I got the feeling across clear enough that you thought it was from true experience

~ Ruth
www.angelfire.com/pa/OriginalMinds/index.html  

angel girl
Member
since 1999-07-23
Posts 322
within a whisper...
9 posted 2002-02-14 07:43 PM


Very moving. Very sad, but very good. I like it a lot.

"What makes letting go hard isn't losing what you had, but losing the dream of what could have been."

AOL IM: fallprincess69

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
10 posted 2002-02-14 09:12 PM



Ruth-
Yes...you definitely expressed this very well.
Such a touching write...it reached right in
and grabbed hold of my heart.
Beautifully done.
AND...for the record...you will NEVER be
forgotten here.  It's great to see
you posting again.
Hugs,
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
11 posted 2002-02-14 09:18 PM




(big huggggsssssss) Oh Ruth, this is so very sad, my heart goes out to all who have to endure this phase in life and I pray they can always walk beside the water and always be amazed by the beauty of memories and love shared! (kiss on cheek) God Bless You, sweet friend, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ruth, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
12 posted 2002-02-14 09:27 PM


Very poignant writing, hoot.

But you have never forgotten the ocean, have you?

Corinne

Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
13 posted 2002-02-14 09:30 PM



Forget you?  Never....

Balladeer
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
14 posted 2002-02-14 10:15 PM


Touch this poem and I'll kill ya! It's beautiful just the way it is....to tie the thought from life to death with the common theme of the ocean is really well thought out....reminds me of how much I miss seeing you here. Welcome back, unforgettable one
Mysteria
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British Columbia, Canada
15 posted 2002-02-15 01:35 AM


I agree but I shall use sugar and spice to plead that you leave it the way it is, as it is simply fantastic.  Ruth, living my the ocean what you described would be quite common here, and you captured it so well.  You are never forgotten in here, and I personally am hoping to meet you in April - can't wait!


Light tomorrow with today!
  ~* Elizabeth Barrett Browning *~



Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
16 posted 2002-02-15 09:18 AM


Hi Ruth! This poem is truly touching and beautiful. Good to see you again!
Wanda
Member
since 2001-10-23
Posts 461

17 posted 2002-02-15 09:24 AM


Hoot; I thought this was well thought out and written in such a way to draw your reader into the poem. An excellent poem.  Wanda
Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression
18 posted 2002-02-15 09:39 AM


If any work is needed,
It might be additional stanzas to further express things,
But the meaning comes through as it is.

Well done, enjoyed

Gloom

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
19 posted 2002-02-15 09:42 AM


well placed
the thoughts
the images

decoration with loving hands

enjoyed it ms

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California
20 posted 2002-02-15 10:41 AM


Ruth

I have precious memories of the ocean with my dad, so this touched me deeply..your last lines brought tears.  Beautifully done!

Nan
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Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
21 posted 2002-02-15 10:45 AM


A poem of yours that 'needs work' is a poem that's pretty much perfect... as this one is...

Got your ticket yet??..

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
22 posted 2002-02-15 10:52 AM


Okay guys....you got me almost in tears here. Sometimes I miss you all so much I just got to come home for a bit. Thanks
Hugs
Ruth

Working on April

~ Ruth
www.angelfire.com/pa/OriginalMinds/index.html  

Interloper
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
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Deep in the heart
23 posted 2002-02-15 03:48 PM


Beautiful!
1derful!
Lovely!

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Charisma
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lost in blue pages
24 posted 2002-02-15 04:55 PM


so good to see you back inhere Ruth, and I agree with lady in white....you penned it straith from your heart, and touched my heart too.


(((warm hugs)))
Charisma

PearlsB4Swine
Member
since 2002-02-01
Posts 130
where the heart finds me
25 posted 2002-02-15 05:11 PM


Wow...I wouldn't change a line; this was a powerfully dramatic portrayal of how we all forget the little things in life that are the most important to us. In trying to fulfill their wants, we overlook their needs. ~~sigh~~ so sad...
Startime
Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada
26 posted 2002-02-15 05:21 PM


STANDING OVATION!!!!!!!THIS POEM IS ABSOLUTELY STUNNING. I LOVE IT!!! **big hugs** MAGNIFICENT

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Sunshine
Administrator
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since 1999-06-25
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Listening to every heart
27 posted 2002-02-15 08:42 PM



Good to know that April will see you, Ruth...came back in to read the comments, and here I find you REALLY coming home!

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