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Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas

0 posted 2007-07-21 01:53 PM


She stands at ease.
The children are in another room;
they have my ears but she my eyes.
She stands at ease
watching her watch her hands
as she deftly peels another,
peels another,
another potato peel.
She watches her hands
as a wisp of hair comes free
sweeping across her brow
knit in concentration,
watching her hands make
long spiral peels.
The corner of her lips twitch
upwards.
Her profile eye slides over
seeing me leaning in door frame
watching her watch me watching.
The children are in another room;
they have my ears but she my eyes.

Alicat
7-21-07

*from a mental picture*

© Copyright 2007 Alastair Adamson - All Rights Reserved
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
1 posted 2007-07-21 03:07 PM


This speaks so much.  

I hope that is what you were writing for.

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

2 posted 2007-07-23 12:51 PM


Your writing lately has taken a turn of style that certainly becomes you. Laid back, but thoughtful and intelligent. (Much more like the Alicat I know. )

This is like your poetic fingerprint!

It is so "you" how could I not love this?


nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
3 posted 2007-07-23 04:05 PM


I could frame this~~ I think this is how most women would want to know someone is watching them.

Good write

M

PhaerieChild
Senior Member
since 1999-08-30
Posts 1787
Aloha, Oregon
4 posted 2007-07-23 08:26 PM


Very nice Alicat. It does make me think how I may be perceived by another. I agree that all women want to be watched in this way.
StormyB
Junior Member
since 2007-07-18
Posts 42
Ohio Usa
5 posted 2007-07-25 06:23 PM


absolutly beautiful way to express.
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