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Passions in Poetry

Get Well Soon

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Alicat
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since 05-23-99
Posts 4277
Coastal Texas


0 posted 07-10-2003 01:16 PM       View Profile for Alicat   Email Alicat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Alicat

Restless and twitching
At least she sleeps for now
Tiny droplets beading
On her hot and fevered brow

Damp hair glistens
As I brush it to the side
I knew this could happen
When I signed up for this ride

So I sit by her side
With a cloth, cool and damp
And with gentle motions
Her heated brow I tamp

A shuddered catarrh
Then how still she lies
One final squeeze of hand
And I say my last goodbyes

Alicat
© Copyright 2003 Alastair Adamson - All Rights Reserved
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


1 posted 07-10-2003 03:14 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Ali, this is so sad. Exceptional work though...
Midnitesun
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since 05-18-2001
Posts 29020
Gaia


2 posted 07-10-2003 05:48 PM       View Profile for Midnitesun   Email Midnitesun   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Midnitesun

in silence, offering a heart hug
Alicat
Member Elite
since 05-23-99
Posts 4277
Coastal Texas


3 posted 07-10-2003 05:57 PM       View Profile for Alicat   Email Alicat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alicat

*smile* No worries. This one was not based off of any real-life instance, but simply from the pictures in my mind. Thank you both for your replies though.

LoveBug
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since 01-08-2000
Posts 5015


4 posted 07-12-2003 10:24 AM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

A very sad picture indeed... you did a very good job in potraying it to us, though. Sad and lovely write.

Oh, make me Thine forever
And should I fainting be
Lord, let me never ever
Outlive my love for Thee

Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-15-99
Posts 7276
Mobile, AL


5 posted 07-13-2003 02:14 AM       View Profile for Temptress   Email Temptress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Temptress

Definetely sad, Kitten.
I like it though...seems it could be about a child.

I hope things are going well for you. Its great to see something after so long.

You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL

Local Parasite
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since 11-05-2001
Posts 2929
Transylconia, Winnipeg


6 posted 07-13-2003 03:54 PM       View Profile for Local Parasite   Email Local Parasite   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Local Parasite's Home Page   View IP for Local Parasite

The title is misleading, but I like that.  It made the ending more real, the same way that experiencing the death of a loved one would truly feel... hopeful at first, and then shattered by the loathesome, anticipated truth.

You wrote the process well, Alastair... and it definitely had a profound impact on me.  This is something I wish I could learn to write.

Excellent work... and good to see you in Sanctuary.

Parasite

Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world.
~Percy Bysshe Shelley

Nicole
Senior Member
since 06-23-99
Posts 1896
Florida


7 posted 08-02-2003 04:49 PM       View Profile for Nicole   Email Nicole   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Nicole

I don't know how you do it, but you've done it again.  Every poem you have written, that I've either read or heard you read stirs some kind of emotion.  Much talent in you m'friend - take care you.

Hugs
Marshalzu
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since 02-15-2001
Posts 4465
Lurking


8 posted 08-02-2003 06:29 PM       View Profile for Marshalzu   Email Marshalzu   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marshalzu's Home Page   View IP for Marshalzu

Great writing

Andy
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